Unrequited love, go cold turkey?

[Planejaneisstunning]

It's not confirmed, but I know deep down he doesn't see me in that way.
I wouldn't say I'm in love, but I have an emotional connection with him. I don't even look at him and think, wow he's fit.. I am just emotionally attached.
He sees me one on one and we talk for hours, no lulls in conversation. We laugh a lot and I swear there's a slightly flirty vibe.
I think he does find me attractive.
We've both said we're very similar and he said we have a lot in common.
No move in 2 months and I just don't think he's into me. Men usually make it known when they are..
I feel like I'd be an idiot to tell him how I really feel. It's rubbish as he's a really decent guy too, not sleazy or disrespectful.
It's just typical he doesn't want to be with me.
Shall I just cut ties and explain why?

how did you meet? and why all these 1-2-1 meets? is he your therapist?!

Could you give it a last shot? I think you need to say, 'Actually I'm developing romantic feelings towards you. Would you like to go on an actual date?'

If he declines you can then send the text to say, 'We're on different pages here, so I'm going to wish you all the best and move on'.

At least you'll know you tried.

We could do with more context here. Who is this person? Are you both single? Why are the one to ones happening? (As in, do you meet up as friends? Is this in work, during time he’s getting paid?). You mention 2 months- as in, you met him 2 months ago? Under what circumstances?

We met through a hobby, I've only known him 2 months but he's asked me to meet one to one.
If I don't talk to him for a few days he'll start talking again.
You're right, I should..I'm too afraid

We are both single and the meetups are in our own time. We can talk for hours
.

Right ok. Maybe he needs a bit of a push. Does he know you’re single and looking for love? If you can’t face asking him out, I would at least definitely mention you’re available and looking and talk about the future you envision when you meet your future partner. That’s his cue to say ‘me too. That’s the kind of thing I want’ or something like ‘I’m not interested in settling down and plan to remain single and go travelling’ or something! Either way, it’ll give you a clue where he’s at without you having to brave asking him out.

how old are you both?

what’s your relationship experience like?

We're both early 30s. All I know is that in one of our very first in depth conversations he told me he's trying not to put pressure on himself and it'll happen when it happens.
Tbh for all he knows I could be seeing someone but he knows I've not got a serious boyfriend anymore.
I've had a few long term relationships which have lasted a few years each time.
As for him, he's never really moved out from home and he doesn't seem to have ever had a serious relationship in the last 10 years or maybe a bit less. He's never mentioned an ex

Tbh for all he knows I could be seeing someone

that would be strange given the multiple hours of 1-2-1

As for him, he's never really moved out from home and he doesn't seem to have ever had a serious relationship in the last 10 years or maybe a bit less. He's never mentioned an ex

you’re brave Op to want to pursue this. Very brave

TBF there have only been a couple of times so far and it hasn't been that often, but yeah probably.
I think he moved out for uni and moved back in.. afaik he's just trying to save to buy a house, which I get is difficult.

so you’ve met up a couple of times alone? and spaced out?

We're meant to meet again this coming week, he asked me to. So wondering if I should say something then?

how many times have you met him 1-2-1 OP?

needn’t be a big declaration.

why not “fancy cinema and a bite to eat?”

Only 3 times up to now.. the thing is I did suggest something like a film, then he ended up busy and seemed to kinda pull back, so I pulled back too and tried to make out like I wasn't that fussed/only friendly (which is stupid I know) then he got back in touch and asked me to meet next week 🙄 so I just don't know.

Do this. Don’t just hang around wondering, and making yourself miserable.

The I think that was your answer right there. You asked him out and he backed off for a bit.

That's why I'm a bit worried he's only into the chase, which is odd in a way as it really doesn't fit with who he is and his personality.

Well that's what I thought, so I backed off too, but then he's come back asking to meet again so I don't know..

Tbh it doesn't really sound like you've spent enough time with him to know what he's like.

Xpost.
Ask him whether this is him asking you on a date. What have you got to lose?

Yeah, need to spend more time with him, I'll see this week I guess..

Honestly didn't expect him to ask again.
I think I'll go to this next meetup, see how it goes and then see if he asks again. If he does I'll say is it a date.

Just be aware that some men like the ego boost of hanging out with a woman who clearly has a crush on them, even if they don't feel the same way.