To be feeling so down about another failed attempt at potty training?

[Itsourtrain]

About to put the mycarry potty and training pants for a third time …

I know he’ll get there when ready but I hate changing nappies at this age (3) it feels like a nod towards a babyhood long left behind.

How long did you try for? My DS2 had lots of accidents for about 10 days before he got the hang of it.

How long did you attempt to train for and has he made any progress at all?

Also I'm guessing if he's 3 you also tried with the toilet a potty at that age is probably very uncomfortable.

Hi Op, attempting potty training with my 3 year old again today. We’ve had two accidents plus x2 wees and x1 poo successfully on the potty.
I haven’t been rushing her, but nursery staff keep making comments 😳

I have 2 children and when I decided to potty train I stuck to my guns, no going back no matter how long it took…..

I had heard that reverting back to nappies can be worse as children soon pick up on the fact that you will eventually put their nappies back on and give up.
I can’t say for sure if this is true or not as I never went back on the idea.

What seems to be the issue with having the accidents? Is he not noticing or just not bothering and prefers to go in the nappy?

DS1 was still in nappies at 7 and it turned out he had really weak muscle tone and core muscles so had to have physio and other therapies. That along with a special alarmed watch helped to get him toilet trained.
DD on the other hand fully trained herself in about a week before she was 2! They all do it at a different pace.

we tried just about every method going with DS1 and it would get really disheartening when it just wouldn’t work.

Just to add - we spent a good week in the house to get adjusted and also brought a potty with us everywhere for a long time after.

Neither of mine managed it until after 3, they just weren't ready - and niether of mine would use a potty, had to be toilet. It just kind of happened late but suddenly with both. Don't feel down, I think people can have unrealistic expectations based on a time when kids tended to get out of nappies earlier because cloth nappies were more uncomfortable.

I've done three. The first I did early, and it was painful and took a long time. By the time of the third, I didn't have the time for painful potty training, put it off until he was older. He mastered it much quicker and was dry at night sooner than the oldest.

He's clearly not ready yet. Save yourself weeks of heartache and put it off until the Summer. When they're ready they are often dry very quickly and the whole process is less of an ordeal.

We tried for over a month. I had to admit defeat when I had no clean pants for him.

He uses the portable potty but toilet other than that.

@LunchBoxPolice I’ve had (nicely meant) comments from preschool too … it’s making it v pressured though.

My two older kids were 3y6m and 3y4m when they potty trained and they just got it, so no “training” required. Pee and poo, day and night.

I tried my son at 2y6m and the only person getting trained was me.

I would read potty books to your son, and make sure he has nice big boy undies, but let him get there in his own time.

Aw sorry I didn’t realise you had been trying for so long - that is totally understandable then.
Maybe delay it another few months and wait until you feel that they are 100% ready.
Both my boys where over 3 before I thought they were ready x

You gotta just keep on keeping on. Ds is 3 and 2 months and I'd say he nailed it maybe two months ago, but it took a good six months to get there. I've read the potty train in 3 days book. Yet it took 6 months start to finish. The only time I lost my calm was a wee accident on the new sofa.

I don’t know whether or not to keep going. I’m worried I’m causing more harm than good, to be totally honest.

Agree with pp saying wait till summer.
Try the eric.org.uk tips but remember he'll do it in his own time.

Potty training nearly broke me. My youngest was 3 years 5 months when he cracked it. This was after many failed attempts and it wasn't easy even at that age, it was still torture.

I tried with DS when he was not long turned 3 and it didn’t work out and was also around this time of year. Too many layers and I don’t think he was ready. I waited until summer and honestly, was so much easier and he got it in less than a week!

I would have to agree with this

My ds was 6 before he was properly trained. It was awful. Picking him up from school in wet trousers. In the end I just realised that he didn’t care… he wasn’t bothered by being wet, or smelling…. But as soon as he did care a bit and got embarrassed he cracked it.

Absolutely agree with the wait until summer/Easter hols (if warm) posts. When my eldest was a toddler one of my friends had a very old school nanny who said that children were ready either the summer before or after they turned 3. (Obviously there were exceptions! but I thought it was a good rule of thumb.

What are the training pants for? They should be bare bottomed or at the very lease commando until they have the basics solidly down.

Going against the flow a bit here. Some children just don't get it until they're nearly 4. I would wait and let preschool/nursery do the majority of the work, peer pressure really does work with late trainers.

For two months? Lol. That’s only one method.

Is your child a perfectionist? It might be worth really reinforcing with them that accidents happen and it's no big deal we clean up and move on. Start with asking them to tell you when they've had an accident and praise that recognition (not the accident). Then work backwards.

Ha - I wish! Just doesn’t seem to care. It does get me down a bit.