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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

or even immoral over house sale? Legal/ estate agent input especially welcome

96 replies

horsish · 19/03/2008 17:38

I have been trying to sell my house for months without much luck. Recently a potential buyer, mr X liked the house, had it surveyed, and said he was prepared to offer x amount (quite a bit below asking price), realised this was less than we hoped but wanted to be upfront BEFORE putting offer in.

We thought about it and agreed to accept an offer of that amount and told him so. He is currently overseas and emailed back to say he would indeed be putting in an offer for x.
That was ten days ago and i have not heard from him.

I was for taking it off the market but agent advised not to till legal offer received.

Meanwhile Mrs Y comes along , loves the house and offers Y which is ABOVE the asking price. Estate agent has ben trying to get a hold of Mr X ( who is NOT likely to up his offer anyway)but he is not answering any communication

AIBU to accept the higher offer having verbally agreed the lower ( which has not been made in writing)?

OP posts:
katwith3kittens · 07/04/2008 23:15

No, I would have sold to Mrs Y.

Whats happened ? How could you possibly be identified ?

Go on.... tell us ........

CarGirl · 07/04/2008 23:18

he had 10 days and you'd tried to get hold of him, if you accepted Mrs Y offer you were within your rights. Unfortunate that he'd paid out for surveys - offer him his money back for them if you want?

bran · 07/04/2008 23:18

Now I'm dying to know.

Is Mrs Y a bitter ex of Mr X? Is she stalking him around the property market and pricing him out of everything he would like to buy in order to exact revenge by keeping him homeless?

Elephantsbreath · 07/04/2008 23:18

Go with Mrs. Y.

It isn't gazzzumping sp? if nothing formal signed.

Original poster
horsish · 07/04/2008 23:19

Sorry , to explain more.

Mrs Y came by and loved the house saying I will offer Y

At that point we had two people telling us they would offer ( dif amounts) with no actual offer!

And we had told the first (mr X)we WOULD take their offer, but ten days after that conversation they had not been back in touch.

Estate agant basically said HURRY UP THEN to Mrs Y who got her offer in the next day, which we accepted.

Mr Xs offer did in fact come in a few days later , and was indeed much lower.

OP posts:
edam · 07/04/2008 23:19

I think most people have said of course you can accept the highest offer, particularly as the first guy never actually made a formal offer in the first place.

Original poster
horsish · 07/04/2008 23:21

There has been heated , indeed fierce criticism from a very unexpected source which has been a source of upset to me and dh.

OP posts:
Twinklemegan · 07/04/2008 23:21

This was a no brainer and of course you did the right thing. And I speak as someone who was gazumped in Scotland, so I'm pretty sensitive about these things.

edam · 07/04/2008 23:21

Well, he was too slow. Tough. He must/should have realised that if he fannied about, someone else might express an interest. He hadn't done any deals about taking the house off the market.

ShinyPinkShoes · 07/04/2008 23:22

I'd proceed with the higher offer from Mrs Y on the understanding that a survey is arranged and conveyancer instructed promptly.

edam · 07/04/2008 23:22

Your unexpected source is talking rubbish, ignore!

Original poster
horsish · 07/04/2008 23:24

Thank you all so much.
I consider myself to be a decent and moral person but this has really got to me

OP posts:
ShinyPinkShoes · 07/04/2008 23:26

Poor you

Ignore them.
Act in the best interests of yourself and your family and I hope all proceeds well

Original poster
horsish · 07/04/2008 23:32

SHINYPINKSHOES that is exactly what dh said but I fear we may have lost a dear friend over it .

OP posts:
ShinyPinkShoes · 07/04/2008 23:36

Did this dear friend make the lower offer, or know someone who did?

Unfortunately mixing any kind of business with friendship can often end in tears but when your family's future is concerned you have to take a businesslike view.

Hopefully they will come round in the end, but it may take some time...

Original poster
horsish · 07/04/2008 23:50

Ok here goes. The dear friend is the neighbour at the old house ( the one we are selling)

Mr X is a sort of friend of theirs, and very much the sort of neighbour they would like.We have moved 2 hours drive from the old house so despite being very close friends with former neighbours had notseen them in months . I can only presume they had heard thro Mr X he was to be their new neighbour. We all along decided NOT to discuss anything with any frinds (inc. neighbour) till it was more or less a done deal.

Mrs. Y , for reasons I cant say (and I dont agree with neighbours assessment) is NOT who they want as a neighbour.

I think they were gutted when they found out.

OP posts:
ShinyPinkShoes · 07/04/2008 23:55

I see.

As nice as it would be to be able to choose our neighbours it's seldom possible.

If he wanted the house that badly IMO he would have made his offer official, instructed a solicitor, and organised a survey.

He had the option to do all of those things but did not- therefore he was the less proactive buyer and may well have dragged his feet.

You've definately done the right thing

Original poster
horsish · 08/04/2008 00:03

Thanks again.That is exactly how we viewed things.

When mr X said he would offer x and we said ok ( and hurry up!)we asked our agent about taking it off market and she said NO WAY! That there was no such thing as an offer unless it was on our lawyer's desk.

I did think Mr X was foolish not to move fast at that point as he was getting house at a very good price.

Mr X actually HAD got a survey on the house,and now our old neighbours are making out like we did the dirty on Mr X.

I think their real issue is with Mrs Y who they REALLY REALLY do not want as a neighbour.

OP posts:
Original poster
horsish · 08/04/2008 00:04

I think the neighbour thinks we have chosen money over friendship.

OP posts:
ShinyPinkShoes · 08/04/2008 00:06

Maybe write your lovely neighbours a letter simply exlaining that Mr X had NOT actually made an offer and that you could not wait any longer.

Also suggest to Mrs Y that she present them with lovely flowers when she moves in hopefully that'll win em over

Original poster
horsish · 08/04/2008 00:13

Thanks again for your continued interest!

Thing is, neighbour knows all the details inside out!

Absolutley refuses to be any way other than mortally wounded by the whole thing .( "distraught " and "devestated" was their actual words )

The husband actuallly said to my dh today we should have contacted them and they could have got mr X to hurry up with his ( MUCH lower) offer !

Work that one out?!

OP posts:
Flibbertyjibbet · 08/04/2008 00:15

No need to explain anything to them. If they moan then tell them what the difference in price was and tell them that if they wanted him so badly as a neighbour they could have coughed up the difference
Anyway they are at the OLD house. Forget about them, if they were such good friends they would have told Mr X off for messing you around and going incommunicado at a crucial point in the housebuying process!
You have not chosen money over friendship fgs, you are not friends with Mr x and the neighbours had no financial part in the house sale. So the money and friendship issues here are completely unrelated!

Idiots.

uttertripe · 08/04/2008 00:15

accept the higher price.
whos retirement are you going to be living/paying for? mr X's or yours?

uttertripe · 08/04/2008 00:20

oh, now ive read thread... the neighbours are misguided. i agree with shineypinkshoes.

youve done nothing to be ashamed of.

Original poster
horsish · 08/04/2008 00:23

I love you all xxxx

You have no idea the sleepless nights this has caused me!

OP posts:
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