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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Asked to wash hands before handling newborn baby?

213 replies

AliciaJohns · 19/03/2008 15:10

I am genuinely asking here. I went to see a friend the other day who has a week old baby. Her dh said (very politely) "would you mind washing your hands before you pick him up?"

I wasn't offended, just confused as I have never been asked to do this before nor would it have crossed my mind to ask people to wash their hands before handling my son!

My hands were clean by the way, in case you think they were caked in mud or something!!

Is this a bit weird? Or am I??!

OP posts:
southeastastra · 19/03/2008 15:33

it's a bit obsessive. we're becoming a very odd nation of hand washers

S1ur · 19/03/2008 15:34

You don't OO but I would want to stroke head/cheeks and hold hands blah blah. I don't think its a big deal and I didn't have a heart attack when someone didn't wash their hands.

Babies are going to meet all sorts of germs and fight them off, just one way of minimsing it in the very early days while feeding is being established and weight piled on.

And as I said, never would immediate family wash consantly that really would be nutziod.

S1ur · 19/03/2008 15:34

You don't OO but I would want to stroke head/cheeks and hold hands blah blah. I don't think its a big deal and I didn't have a heart attack when someone didn't wash their hands.

Babies are going to meet all sorts of germs and fight them off, just one way of minimsing it in the very early days while feeding is being established and weight piled on.

And as I said, never would immediate family wash consantly that really would be nutziod.

SheherazadetheGoat · 19/03/2008 15:37

imagine mumsnet before they discovered typhoid etc was water born. 'boiling water what a nonsense, tastes better straight from the sewer'

AdelaideJo · 19/03/2008 15:38

But the huge amounts of cases of Norovirus and hideous 'flu every single year are SURELY a sign that not enough people do actually take hand-washing seriously enough? Its not just enough to do it after you've been to the loo...my DP and I both work in hospitals and the second we walk in our front door we are washing hands and faces - who needs to paste bugs all over their home? Think of the amount of door handles people touch in the course of a day...lovely.

WowOoo · 19/03/2008 15:39

I offered to wash my hands when I last handled a new baby. This was bc I had taken my son's shoes off which may have had dog poo on them and I had just blown my nose. mother wasn't bothered either way, but made me feel better when she proceeded to chew my hands!!
Now, my son is another story. He'll wash his hands and then shove them down the loo to retrieve a toy car, then kiss the car - that is gross.

WowOoo · 19/03/2008 15:40

When I say she chewed hands I mean the babe, not the mum!

S1ur · 19/03/2008 15:44

lol wowooo,

Is it acceptable to lick clean the hands of people wanting to touch my pfb?

Or am I slightly weird?

LittleMissBliss · 19/03/2008 15:48

I made people wash hands when they handled ds for the first week, my baby my choice. And i make dp wash his hands and remove layer of clothing and have a drink before handling ds after smoking even now . His dad smokes and ds smells of stale smoke after hes been holding him eurgggh i can't stand it.

LittleMissBliss · 19/03/2008 15:49

I made people wash hands when they handled ds for the first week, my baby my choice. And i make dp wash his hands and remove layer of clothing and have a drink before handling ds after smoking even now . His dad smokes and ds smells of stale smoke after hes been holding him eurgggh i can't stand it.

LittleMissBliss · 19/03/2008 15:51

Need to puctuate!

AdelaideJo · 19/03/2008 15:52

Smoking PIL...I've got that joy to come and its making me feel ill just thinking about it.

Is there even a right way to ask someone who has just stubbed out their Mayfair to wash their hands/not breathe in the face of your baby?

cupsoftea · 19/03/2008 15:52

I(d be fine with this & would do it anyway as dealing with nose wipes, muddy shoes & such like.

jazzandh · 19/03/2008 15:53

Well Dh was in hospital for 3 months after he was born having aquired some gastro thing from the NURSES. It damaged stomach lining and took years to heal properly.

So he was really paranoid about hand washing with pfb and when you have experienced the extreme consequences - it seems far more sensible for the first few weeks to be cautious. Where's the harm in it?

scottishmummy · 19/03/2008 15:54

AliciaJohns - reasonable request. hands that look clean are far from it!

Dirty hands transport vehicle for amongst others
Clostridium difficile
Novo-virus
MRSA
Flu and common cold
Acinetobacter

all that is needed is hot water and liquid soap (NOT bar of saop as germs just multiply in it)

it is one of the single most effective actions to reduce germ tranmission. simple eh!

Original poster
AliciaJohns · 19/03/2008 20:53

Am amazed by (size of) response!! On the strength of this, I think I might ask people to wash their hands once #2 is born, if only just to annoy my in-laws...

OP posts:
ELR · 19/03/2008 20:55

a bit of grub and dirt does them good!!

S1ur · 19/03/2008 20:58

It certainly does ELR.

Just sicky D&V bugs which aren't so traditionally mud-pie-tastic!

pukka · 19/03/2008 20:59

pfb type parents.
the only time i was ever asked to wash hands was when visiting friends premie baby in the hospital.
i wouldnt bother visiting such rude people again.
having said that, i tend not to touch newborns, give them kissess etc. holding them through clothing is fine, but i just tend not to touch their skin . they dont really need the extra skin contact imo. but very very rude of the parents to order like that

PSCMUM · 19/03/2008 21:03

twiglett, you may hink they are a freak, but they'd be being pretty sensible i think, and its not exactly an over bearing burden is it, to run your hands under the tap for 2minutes?!

S1ur · 19/03/2008 21:06

Pukka they hardly ordered, OP said the dh asked very politely.

Wouldn't consider that rude myself.

pukka · 19/03/2008 21:07

the implication is that you are unclean and therefore unfit to be near our precious firstborn. so no matter how polite the tone, the actual act of saying so is rude.
so yes, he did order.

GColdtimer · 19/03/2008 21:09

Errmm, I always wash my hands before holding a newborn (she states boldly as if she picks up newborns ALL the time

Perhaps I am just a clean freak.

PSCMUM · 19/03/2008 21:11

the implication is not that you are unclean, but that their baby is very precious and new and they want to do all they can to protect it. nothing wrong with that.

PotPourri · 19/03/2008 21:12

Have never heard anyone saying this before - personally I think it is a bit anally retentive. A bit like the whole obsession with antibacterial handwash/cleaner/washing up liquid/air freshner - personally I think kids benefit from coming into contact with a reasonable amount of germs to build immunity. There are far too many sickly kids who live in sterile homes!

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