To be worried about my babies development?

[flappybits]

I've reached out to the health visitor with concerns at 8, 10 and now 12 months. I keep getting told that babies do things at their own pace and to not compare, and I do understand that but I also really do feel like my baby needs support.

I think his social skills are ok, possibly slightly behind? He doesn't have any words yet but he babbles, interacts, has good shared attention, follows where I point, passes me things, takes part in repetitive games like peekaboo etc. He doesn't point or clap. He has waved a couple of times but not consistently.

His motor skills I'm concerned about, he can sit independently but can't get himself into a sitting position from lying down. He can roll but he can't crawl, he can't stand, he doesn't appear to weight bear well at all his legs whether he can't or he isn't trying to, I'm not sure.

So yes, I am comparing to my eldest who by now had been crawling for 4 months, pulling up to stand and cruising around furniture and was two weeks off taking his first steps. My baby is nowhere near that.

AIBU to be worried? Or should I keep pushing for a referral?

My daughter was born at 8 months and her body was covered in blond hair, it came out with time.

Strange reply. I would expect a health professional to do a fair bit if parents are concerned about their child's development, especially since it is clear that he is delayed in meeting milestones.

OP. I have been here with my first two children. I remember the worry and trying to fight to be listened to well. So many well-meaning people telling me not to worry, they all develop in their own time etc. It just made me feel that no one wanted to listen to me.

I would definitely see your GP.

Sounds a lot like my DD who is now 18m. She didn't roll until 10m, didn't crawl until 12m or get from lying down to sitting. She isn't walking yet and it took her ages to cruise like other babies. She's only just in the last few days, started to take a few independent steps.

It's very easy for people to say "don't worry" and "enjoy it while it lasts" etc, however, it can be worrying and it's hard not to compare. DD is my first, so I only had the other NCT babies to compare to who all seemed to be budding adventurers compared my little potato baby 😂. It is most likely that there's nothing wrong, but I would ask to be seen again in a couple of months and go from there.

This is an example of what happens when he tries to crawl, he gets all sort of contorted

And a foot is always stuck under like this

Have you not had a one year review yet? DC1 was red flagged at his as he wasn’t pulling up to standing, and not bearing weight on his legs was of concern. Naturally, he started doing it the week after! He didn’t walk until 15 months but was crawling at one. I would also be concerned in your shoes - he does look bendy, for want of a better word. Keep pushing.

My daughter crawled like that! Not until 15 months though and she was also teeny and 7 weeks early. She walked at 18 months. Does he bounce on your knee standing up? If he's using the walker, that's some weight bearing, and they only cause issues if used for extended periods of time.

Your eldest sounds very advanced, and of course you will compare we all do. But I work in child development and nothing you say it concerning me. Triggers for referral are no words by 18 months and not walking by two, both of which you have months to go before then. My ds is 17 months, not walking and not talking. He is under OT due to health concerns as a baby and they are not concerned about his development whatsoever!

He absolutely sounds more like a 35 weeker to me (I’ve spent time working with prem babies) so if you correct him back 5 weeks he’s 10.3 months not 12.

We were told to wait until 18 months for a physio referral in similar circumstances even though DD was marked low for gross motor skills in the 1 year HV visitor review. It only warranted a follow up phone call a few months later where I was told to call back at 18 months if still worried. The GP has told us not to worry and she might just be in the slow range of normal. She still can’t pull to stand, cruise or go from lying to sitting by herself at 18 months and never crawled but eventually started bum shuffling at 13 months.

Have you been offered a 1 year review or spoke to the HV or GP today OP? Looking at the pictures, the one with his foot stuck under is common in trying to crawl, suddenly they work it out and they’re off.

in the others it looks like he is ‘w sitting’. It’s not a problem in itself and most children do it in some form and amount.

Your worrying is going to make you stressed and anxious, he needs to be reviewed either to identify and problem through observation and physical exam or to find no issues and put your mind at ease

Not yet. I've been trying to get him seen for a while. I've phoned 3 times over the last few weeks to try book in his 12 month check but they don't actually have one in my area, they get sent down from a city a couple of hours away and I can't get a date out of them. I will try the GP.

@DogLover24 that's good to know 😊

@flappybits any update on your DC? How are they now?x