The obsession with children being loud in public and disturbing others...

[floweplantpot]

On here, is incredible.

I'm nearly 40 years old and I don't think any child has ever disturbed me while I was out in public. I just don't understand how easily irritated people on here get ?

Do we go to different places or something ?

Does anyone else relate to me or do others also often encounter children that bother them in public ?

Think, being on their iPads / phones watching ' very loud ' videos that have ruined your trip out to lunch, or kids running around places etc.

I've never really seen this or even noticed it.

Same on planes.. I've been sat near babies and they sometimes cried, but nothing unbearable.

On here it's like people absolutely despise kids out and about being loud/ existing and being kids...

The only people that have ever bothered me in public have been drunk adults who were threatening people in a tube carriage / a random man in the supermarket calling me a slut / another random man shouting at me for no reasons once when I was sitting in a parked car.. never kids..

Agreed. I often feel overwhelmed by noise but can’t even remember the last time a kid was being too noisy in public. I miraculously seem to go to restaurants and public areas with minimally disruptive children.

I have frequently heard children shouting, crying and shrieking in cafes and restaurants. I have also seen them tearing around the library and treating it like a play centre.

Exactly.

You wish.

Things tend to be said often because most people are dull and without wit or wisdom.

Obsession is a very accurate choice of word here.

Your post is very snarky so presumably that is a style you're familiar with.

I don’t think it’s an obsession. If it is you could equally say many parents seem to have an obsession that their children must be allowed to enjoy themselves at top volume regardless of the environment or needs of others. Let them be kids is all very well in a park, in the doctors surgery not so much.

Recently I took my DD to do a test for her drivers licence (not in UK and here you need to do an online ‘hazard perception’ test at the motor registry office). It’s a very large place with a big waiting room with rows of chairs and people waiting for their number to be called. DD was being given instructions for where to sit, how to log on, what to do if you accidentally pressed the wrong button etc. There were two young boys, not toddlers I’d say around 6 or 7, rolling around on the floor, climbing under the seats absolutely screaming with laughter, shouting etc. DD and the lady who was talking to her had to lean across the counter to talk to each other as you couldn’t hear anything above the noise of the kids. People were turning around looking, the security guard went and stood next to them trying to work out which parent was responsible for them and it just went on and on. Fortunately DD passed the test despite the racket.

Trains are the worst. I always have ear plugs with me now as I have been stuck so many times on a standing room only train near to someone who thinks their child is entitled to play some shit video at high volume for over an hour.

Anyone pissing around on a device in public without headphones is annoying. It's usually adults who do this in my experience but some kids do it too. I don't blame the kids though; surely every adult knows that listening to someone else's computer game/music/film while on the bus is hell.

Also screaming and whistling does my head in. It's like a knife through my brain. But again, adults are just as guilty of this as kids.

The only one that's specific to kids that I find annoying is when they run around in restaurants or other venues that are entirely unsuitable for running around in because they're potentially dangerous. Probably comes from all the years I did working in restaurants where I was terrified of spilling scalding hot soup on a child whose parents thought a packed restaurant was a soft play.

The recurring theme here is adults are annoying. I like kids; I frequently don't like their parents though.

Had a meal out spoiled by a child? Once in my life, and that was because the parents let their toddler watch Peppa Pig at top volume which made my kid cry because he didn’t have an iPad with Peppa Pig on it 😐

Had a meal out spoiled by loud drunk men boasting to each other or bothering me? Errrrr maybe 100 times, 200 perhaps more

Well lucky you. The rest of us seem to be aware that children's behaviour has been getting worse which correlates with the increase in ADHD, neuro diversity and all the other syndromes which are often an excuse to mask bad behaviour and poor parenting. Children don't have meltdowns they have tantrums

ODFOD!

I have lived in the UK and Norway and it is very apparent that tolerance for children in society is much lower in the UK, and that isn’t because Norwegian children are better behaved.

I do think it reaches the point of obsession when people demand that children should be banned from public spaces, such as restaurants and some planes.

Equally though, I think there used to be a social contract that some attempt would be made to keep your children quiet so they wouldn’t disturb others in public spaces, and like so many other social contracts, that one has been eroded as peoples have become more selfish.

I've got misophonia. I find high pitched noises painful. I imagine repeated squealing can be absolutely unbearable and meltdown inducing for some with neurodiversities. Yes, children will be children. That's why parents need to be parents. Consideration for others costs nothing.

I never noticed until I had kids because I never used to be in places where kids were.

You dont get a lot of kid noise during peak commuting hours or evening dining.

Take a bus during school hours to the local wetherspoons and you will see it plenty.

I agrée with you.

I mean on a plane you might encounter a baby who was in pain and crying but surely that’s understandable and you just feel sorry for them?

Much more likely to come across rude and loud adults, I agree.

💯

I once encountered a really obnoxious man on the bus who complained very loudly when my tired 4 year old ds was crying on the bus about where we were sitting.

“Well I don’t want to listen to you!” I suddenly heard a voice boom very loudly from behind us on the other side of the bus. It was this middle class man fiddling about on his iPad and glancing up at us.

I told him “He’s 4 years old and is tired. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m trying to soothe him and YOU are distracting HIM.”

He then told me his children never acted like that when they were children. So me and a couple of other women on the bus laughed at him at that point and told him he was being bloody ridiculous because all small children act up at times.

Fucking prick 🤦🏼‍♀️🤣. Adults are definitely the annoying ones.

Misophonia must be awful. But high pitched is just what most children sound like. Obviously repeated screaming is different but a squeal of excitement or joy is not a reflection of a parent not parenting.

I think it is more common here (I'm in Australia) it's extraordinarily child centric- but only my child. I find that the attitude here is fark all of you, my kid can do what it wants, when it wants, and if that's to the detriment of others, so what- a kind of survival of the fittest parenting does mean that parks and sometimes restaurants can be fun to navigate p, but once you accept that's just how it works, there is no point getting het up about it. iPads at tables don't bother me, I don't see it that differently than when you brought pencils etc, it's just the ,newer' way to entertain. I don't think the full volume thing, but equally, have just had to learn to live with it

Most of the time I like seeing kids out and about . Past twice I’ve been out in a local wine bar : 1st time 3 under 6’s running about standing on seats .
2nd time a toddler about 18 months listening to baby shark on a phone at full volume .
I don’t blame the children I blame the parents .
It’s also put me off returning to the wine bar .

I am generally more irritated by the parents who do not parent their children. Little Sophie will not learn any social skills if Daddy doesn’t guide her about what is socially acceptable!!

The only example I could think of was being at a wedding where a child screamed the whole way through it.

Same on planes.. I've been sat near babies and they sometimes cried, but nothing unbearable.

If you had sat next to DD and I when we flew to Sydney when she was not quite one you would probably have thought, what a delightful well behaved baby.

If you had sat anywhere on the same plane as us a year later when we took a very short haul flight from Manchester to Jersey you would certainly have hated us. It was unbelievably awful. The flight was delayed (all due to Diana's funeral) and DD threw such a spectacular tantrum the cabin crew had the steps brought back and I was "invited" to leave the plane to calm her down. When we got back on she continued to scream half the way to Jersey.

But actually when we got past the toddler phase she was pretty civilised and could be taken anywhere.

I totally agree OP. I’ve never been bothered in public by noisy children, never heard a blaring loud iPad either. Another one that crops up is “feral children climbing all over the place in a restaurant”. Never seen it.

Feral and loud adults of the other hand are ten a penny these days. And even worse - fucking dogs in public barking, licking things they shouldn’t lick and generally bothering people. Give me a kid with an iPad in a cage any day over a slobbering, casting, oversized and overindulged mutt in a cafe.

OP you're not noticing it because you're that parent who lets their kids run around like crazy and bothering other people.