Rude kid/sleepover

[sweatband]

Have a child staying over tonight from sons school, age 9.

He's already made a fat mum joke multiple times (yes I am on the portly side so have taken offence), and he's been incredibly offensive and rude on other levels, non-stop showboating throughout about his Nike airforce this and his foreign holiday that, even asking my child why he always wears the same trainers (he doesn't but that's beside the point).

He has made me realise how polite my kids are though, every cloud...

I just don't know how to control my annoyance at such a rude brat. AIBU to never allow another sleepover again?

Just tell him calmly but straight to the point whenever he makes a rude comment, e.g. "it's unkind to comment on people's bodies", "not everybody cares about the latest trainers or holidays" etc.

I'd not invite him back again and I'd tell his parents about the fat jokes.

I think you can adress the fat mum joke regardless. It's terribly misognynist (sp) and I suspect his father might crack this sort of joke. "We don't make jokes about peoples bodies" or whatever language you think the brat will understand.

Happens again and I may lose my sh1t, but for now I'm going with not parenting them for the evening, OH can deal with it, not that it's his fault but the brat won't be staying again

Just say “no Thankyou” to every negative comment. Trust me he’s heard it at school 😂 Does he have older siblings? You should have had your child’s back here. You’ve flaked though.

I secretly love a sleep over when I can get my hands on my dc’s friends and pull them up on their shit. Endless complaining? Not on my watch. Stupid voices which makes it impossible to understand what your saying? Talk properly or you get nothing. Mad picky eating? I don’t care, here is the food available, I’m not getting involved in your daily meal based melodrama.

embrace it! Sometimes kids need to be told.

This makes you sound absolutely mental and makes me feel better that I decided my kids won't be going on sleepovers.

My super picky eater actually prefers that. She's never terribly hungry so she can easily go without or just pick bits and pieces from what's available. It's the parents that give her a lot of (fancy) options ,make a big show and dance about it and keep drawing attention to it that upset her.

This!!
My dd has made a new friemd at secondary school who calls for her every morning and expects me to give them a lift! On the odd occasion that l do, she nevers says thank you. But the good thing is dd thinks she is quite rude too so glad she realises

I had a boy from my sons class over for a play date with 2 other boys (they been previously and no issues) but this boy was an absolute nightmare, he was AWFUL! I genuinely felt so traumatised once he left. I was honest with his mum and said how incredibly rude he was. He
speaks to her like shit so she didn’t even tell him off, just looked really awkward at me and left. I told my son that I would not tolerate being treated like that by him so I wont allow it from another child and that he will never be allowed back round. This was about 5 years ago and he’s never got through the front door. Disrespectful little shit.

This is just quite weird and scary!

How horrible OP. You shouldn’t have to put up with that. And your poor kids must have been so embarrassed.
When my son was little one of his friends took the mick out of the way I pronounce something. He was so upset I found him upstairs shaking with anger and crying (and he was such a placid lad). He was always so protective of me, was just us from when he was 1-12.

Only 1 child has never been invited back to my house because he was an absolute nightmare. He tried to take dds iPad off her, called her a spoilt brat for having one and told her Santa wasn't real. He was upstairs in ds room and came downstairs to take it off her. I phoned his mum to collect.

He's never been back.

Op, I sympathise with you. Just chalk it up and don’t have him over again.

I know it's not the main point but neither I nor my kids have more than one pair of trainers. Kids especially grow out of them so fast!

Pull him up on it, little brat! Tell him outright that he is being really rude and bad mannered and you will be calling his parents to collect him if he doesn't show some manners. And follow through on it! Tell his parents exactly how he has been behaving. Hopefully they will be utterly mortified and knock some class into the little shite.

I wouldn’t hesitate to tell his parents exactly what he’d said and did, and I’d never have him back.

I don't understand why you won't tell him to pack it in!

He's only 9!

As for the showing off, he is only 9 and might need people pointing out that showing off is not fun. Speak up, in a polite mentoring type of way - this is how children learn. So many harsh and silly responses, who is really going to text ‘hi, your child has been showing off all night and he’s going on my nerves so please collect’

Tell him the ghost gets a bit cross when kids get lippy.

(Joke. Don't do that).

I've had this before with a playdate. DS friend came round and was an utter shit all the time he was here. Teasing my youngest, running around, being really rude to me and my husband. We felt like strangers in our own home it was horrible. He's not been back on his own since.

What a little shit that kid sounds

Urgh I hate it when you come across a kid like that. Like you say, it does make you appreciate how nice your own kids are! My DD in particular, is definitely a parents favourite.
The fat mama jokes would piss me off (he's in your house, the rude little horror) and I have no time for the bragging.
Don't let him back for another visit and don't say "Oh he's been fine, good, lovely" etc out of politeness, to the parents at pick up!

I secretly love a sleep over when I can get my hands on my dc’s friends and pull them up on their shit.

I'm sure you didn't mean this to sound as disturbing as it does.

But all the same, your poor kids must be mortified.

I don't get why you just don't tell the kid off.

Ive had this once..

I generally hand it back i guess? I dont take offence as i guess its the showing off, pushing boundaries thing.

Like i had a kid swearing trashing the place, and i had a birthday card from my hubby with a joke on it on the table (nothing super rude like a baked bean joke card indicating a fart no words just a hint image)

She started pointing at it going omg so bad, how horrid, your all disgusting. I laughed and said nothing compared to whats been coming out your mouth..then she went quiet and didnt make a rude peep again.

I dont know if thats the right tact..but i gather that if they are testing their environment you have to assert yourself so they know you are the grown up, if you remain mute they think they are ruling the roost. But also cant be the parent. So its frustrating.

Im still learning, ive been quite shocked how mean kids can be 😅 i dont remember it being so intense when i was a kid.