Selling a birthday gift

[Neodymium]

Need opinions.

We have an oculus quest. DS (almost 13) bought it just after his 11th birthday. For his 11th bday I can’t recall everything he got but I know he got a really good mountain bike. He had a bunch of friends over for a sleepover party and one of them brought his occulus. DS loved it and wanted to use his bday money to buy one. But he didn’t have enough. I paid for the other half. I don’t remember exactly how it was phrased but he says that I just bought it for him for his bday. I thought that I just paid half and so it’s half his and half family.

2 years on he barely plays it but DS14 likes playing it. DS12 wants to sell it as he wants to buy a computer instead. Note he has a laptop for school but wants a gaming PC. I have said he can’t sell it as DS14 likes playing it and I own half. He claims that I don’t own half and I just bought it for his bday, and therefore regardless of DS14 he has the right to sell it.

AIBU to say he can’t sell it?

Virtual reality gaming thing that you use over your eyes

Common sense isn't dead yet.

You are being unfair.

It was a gift.

I'd be interested in how you'd feel about your presents coming with conditions.

I'm pretty sure when you made up the price difference you didn't make clear this was now "family" property.

It's not your child's job to subsidise their siblings entertainment. If your younger children want the same thing then they get their own or you buy back the present if they want to sell it to re-gift (at an appropriate price re: used goods).

You also don't get to dispose of their things to wider family for free.

That handbag you rarely use - how would you feel about your child "gifting" to their aunt for example without permission when you could sell it or gift it yourself to a friend?

This isn't "sharing" it's stealing.

One word: boundaries.

You need to teach your children and yourself to have them.