To think Super Nanny Jo Frost has lost the plot?

[Pekoe78]

Assuming she sanctions the views on her social media page. Jo Frost has shared this bizarre scary post claiming that an unclean home is the “number one sign” of child abuse. How is she getting away with such inaccurate information? Surely she knows the difference between abuse and neglect and that actual abuse can happen in any home. If a child is actually suffering from real neglect, simply telling the parents “clean your house” is not going to help a complex situation. So what is she trying to achieve apart from making parents terrified of being accused of something because they are behind with cleaning?!

I worked for a local council Child Protection department some years ago. A dirty house was seen as a sign of neglect. I’m not talking about a bit untidy. I’m talking about wading through filth.

Oh, that's really sad. Somebody tried to pull their shit together and make a lovely Christmas Day and then it fell apart irrevocably.

I would like to see the statistics on whether there is a correlation between dirty homes and abuse, before jumping to conclusions.

yeah I know. It's quite poignant.

I dont know what happened to the family because it was a real life case study being used as a learning tool. But I hoped things got better.

I then did go on to work in the legal side of child protection for 4 years. We had some wonderful success stories where people just needed a bit of a helping hand (not shaming which frankly doesn't work and is always counter productive) and things ended up being all fine and indeed worked out beautifully. Others not so much. But the failures were all complicated and multi faceted. Little of it was about how much they loved their kids.

I agree with her

I once reported an ex friend to social services as her house was so disgusting, not only seriously messy and cluttered but also filthy.
Her kids bedroom still haunts me tbh and it was years ago. an absolute filthy tip with a bare mattress and no bed clothes 😢

Apparently they did get a visit so I hope the kids were helped

She does have experience - she worked as a nanny for 30 years before she became "Supernanny".

Everyone seems to be forgetting that she's not a qualified parenting expert - she's a TV personality and her shows are, first and foremost, designed to be entertaining. Otherwise nobody would watch them.

She can't fix complex and difficult problems in 40 minutes of television and IMO it's a bit silly to expect her to. She's there to provide entertainment alongside families who have chosen to sign up to reality TV.

She clearly states dirty so I'm not sure what you're confused about op. Almost always, when you hear of those horrible abuse cases the home was an absolute shit hole. So she's definitely right about that.

Was it Aberlour, @CHRIS003 ?

I used to do shifts in a safeguarding team. We are not talking about the fact you havent bleached your skirting boards or perhaps would not pass the white gloves over the top surfaces test. The dirty homes we were called to could be smelled as you approached, there would be pet feces laying around - it was standard to keep some cheap trainers in the car so you could throw them away after being in the house. Once took a bottle of opiods off a baby who had found it in the mess on the floor. Fun fact - they often had guns too (it was overseas).

I bet your children are fed and bathed and have clean clothes and bedding?

I bet your bathroom and kitchen have at least had the surfaces cleaned and the plates washed?

No, she's not talking about you. Unless the above is wrong

No. Neglect is a type of abuse. Even if caused because the parent is too physically or mentally unwell, even if not intentional. If someone has serious mh issues that mean they do not look after their child properly that child is being abused, by tye absence of good parenting.

You seem to think only added actions can be abuse which would miss 90% of the abused kids on child protection plans right now.

I would like to see the statistics on whether there is a correlation between dirty homes and abuse, before jumping to conclusions

This isn't didn't get round to wipe the kitchen counters, had a busy week so the vacuum didn't get taken round, got a laundry backlog because there's no room or desire for a tumble drier and it's a pain getting washing dried. Nor does it assume that abuse and neglect doesn't happen in tidy homes.

One branch of neglect is failing to provide a safe environment for children. If a home is filthy, got trash lying around, isn't cleaned and the children are living in chaos that is neglect. A child is not safe or well cared for if they cannot wash or they're washing in a filthy bathroom, or they can't get clean clothing, or have filthy bedding so nowhere appropriate to sleep.

If a home has got to the point where the children are not being safely looked after, there's likely other risk factors around the parents as well (because most people don't find themselves living in filth).

The original tweet is poorly written and I suspect has been done as clickbait to get a debate started, but some people are really missing the point that filthy and chaotic environments are harmful to children.

The point is that children being made to live in filthy homes is child abuse.

I think nothing of the sort and am well aware that neglect can be a form of abuse.

Dirty houses are a predictor of a child being vulnerable.

The more vulnerable a child is, the easier it is for them to be abused.

As other posters have said, this isn't crumbs on the work surface, a teabag on the side, haven't washed up from last night's dinner dirtiness. This is animal/human faeces and urine on carpets and furniture; weeks/months worth of unwashed clothing/dishes; no edible food in the house because its mouldy; thick black grime everywhere; filthy bedrooms/bathrooms/living spaces...

Those children are being neglected which is abuse in itself.

But those children are likely to be experiencing other issues - severe parental MH issues; poverty; possibly substance misuse.

Those are the children targeted by gangs for County Lines and CSE. The children who don't 'appear' to come from loving homes; with parents who want to know where they are and who they are with; the children who can be manipulated with new phones or food. These children don't have parents who are able to prioritise them - if they did, the children wouldn't be living in squalor.

I make no judgement about her ability to be entertaining. I said that I don’t rate her advice as it’s based on very little and can be damaging. She may have experience as a nanny but that doesn’t mean her advice is good. She might have been a shit nanny.

YABU.
How many news stories have we heard about children dying at the hands of their parents/mothers' boyfriends etc etc and the state of their house is always mentioned or photographed?
It's generally indicative of parents who don't give a flying fig about their children's well-being and are prioritising other people and/or drugs/drink over their children.
A dirty house is a sign that something is wrong somewhere.

Maybe you should get off your high horse. Honestly what a rude assumption to make.

It can go the other way, a sterile house where nothing can be put out of place etc and no sign of children in it

I hated the naughty step. I used to watch her and I found patience and talking lots did well for me. My partner their father all he says is one word and that's it. I became comfortable with my parenting style and as long as they are not rude or out galavanting then I am cool. My girls are good girls but they had their challenges.

@Jollyoldfruit none of that denoted sqalar

@margotrose Jo Frost is 53 she started Nannying at 18. I have brought up 4 children over 20 years 24/7. I don't know everything because my children didn't present themselves as challenging. They had there moments but they were generally good. If I was to ever leave my children with anyone I would look at qualifications first then experience. I want the best nanny or tutor for my children.

I don't really get it.

If it is true (and I also would have thought a dirty house was more a marker of neglect rather than abuse), why is she telling child abusers to clean their house?

What's the point of that?

Surely telling them to stop abusing their kids would be more useful?

Although obviously a moot point because they're not going to do either based on a tweeted instruction from her (or anyone, really).

If it is true (and I also would have thought a dirty house was more a marker of neglect rather than abuse), why is she telling child abusers to clean their house?

Neglect is abuse.

I remember a thread on here about a year ago where someome was asking whether everyone should have some sort of basic safeguarding training.

Lots of people disagreed but, reading this thread, I think some people.would actually benefit from having a little more knowledge than they do.

But ultimately she's not there to give good advice, she's there to make good reality TV that makes money, gets lots of views and creates a bit of controversy along the way (which in turn will increase views and make even more money).

People seem to be expecting her to be completely up to date on attachment parenting, child psychology etc, but that's not her job. Her job is to present a reality TV show.