Weird thread, but if your pets would proudly gift you one present for your birthday...

[SpeedbirdSquawker]

What would it be?

Mine would be very excited to give me a tube to run through (I have excitable rodents). They absolutely love their tubes with all their hearts and get excited when theirs is returned after a cleaning out of their living quarters.

A tennis ball! The grubbier and stinkier the better (cocker spaniel)

Just pure adoration, sadly. My dog isn't motivated by anything other than my approval, so I think the biggest gift she would think I would appreciate would be to follow me around, trying to sit on me whenever I sat down, and cuddling up to me at all times.

I very much fear she thinks every day is my birthday....

A soft fleece blanket. Ddog 4yo rubs her face right in like she did as a dpuppy when we first got her home.

My cat would gift me a ball of screwed up tinfoil to chase around the living room. Or a dead field mouse, which is the last actual present she brought in.

Lick-e-lix, if she could bear to part with it

A warm blanket. We both love a cuddle so I'm sure she (cat) would think we could both benefit from it. She's not entirely altruistic so there would have to be a joint benefit to 'my' gift.

An antler

Childhood cat : a half eaten butterfly.
Previous parents cat : a fart in the face and lots of hair.
Current parents cat : some purring.
I ❤️ them all so much.

A yak chew from the dog and a toy mouse from the cat - he particularly likes the one he got for Christmas that runs when you pull its tail - or a few dead rats that he likes to leave in odd rooms around the house

Probably a bag of mealworms. It's their favourite treat.

I'm certain that if mine could walk into a pet shop and buy a live squirrel in a cage he would think that was the perfect gift.

I'm also certain that he would enjoy the gift more than me.

A pack of Dreamies. Probably one that she's already half eaten.

She'd persuade me to get on my hands and knees to sniff disgusting things like poo, which she thinks is heavenly and I'm convinced secretly wishes I would come to appreciate if only I gave it a try.

Dog is a retriever so anything that I could conceivably fit in my mouth because oh the joys of bringing some random item to a human! Or alternatively a puddle - the muddier the better.

cat - the headless body of a rabbit. Don’t know why he does that but it is particularly disturbing and he seems inordinately proud of himself dropping it at my feet and expects pats and scratches as congratulations. If you fail to give enough affection and walk away he will pick it back up and follow you.

Anything edible. However only to look at as he would then eat it. He would never dream of seeing a piece of food eaten by anyone other than him.

Well that would be the ultimate fantasy @Grimchmas! She did catch one once and was so surprised she immediately spat it out. She loves flushing out pheasants and likewise once cornered one and they looked at each other not sure what to do next until she lost interest. She would be a rubbish hunting dog.

Cat 1. A mouse. Or more realistically a mouse's gallbladder after he brought me the mouse and then decided he was peckish.

Cat 2. Would not understand the concept of something not being hers. Might give me a hairball.

My border collie - a chuck it with a ball & energy to play all day.

My golden retriever pup - a soft toy, or the threads, stuffing & remains of a soft toy.

My cat - anything edible. She loves her food, & everyone else's.

Some cheese, only it probably isn’t very good for me so perhaps give me one crumb and she will eat the rest. See how I like it.

(IME cats LOVE cheese, and mice aren’t bothered, at least if you are trying to catch them)

A McDonalds teddy. He loves them so much, I put a plea out on FB for any that people didn’t want and he was gifted about 30 of them! I’ve put some away but he has at least 10 on the go dotted around the house and they must come on walks with him. Alternatively, a dead bird off the beach (he’s also a retriever).
And a birthday dinner of alllll the food (he’s a Labrador).

I’ve been ill with a rotten proper flu for a week.

Mine keeps finding and bringing me his blanket.

Not the quite nice new fleece one he got for Christmas mind (he’s yet to fall in love with that one) but the manky, tattered, smelly scrap he adores and takes everywhere.

Big dog - a tennis ball at the best stage of terminal squeak.
Small dogs - a fluffy blanket to snuggle under with them.
Feline - too aloof for presents, too selfish to consider the feelings of a human.

If asked today my cat would give me a Sainsbury's Christmas pudding toy with a red feather on it.

Or cat treats

A frog.
I have lost count of how many frogs my 3 cats insist on bringing in through the cat flap and l have to keep returning to nearby woods.

An empty paper bag.