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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DH doesn't think critically about a recipe as he's making it

257 replies

shaniahoo · 04/01/2024 20:35

I desperately need to rant about my lovely DH, but not to his face since he's just made me a really lovely dinner and I am grateful for that. I am.

But when he cooks from a recipe he sometimes does something really weird because he read it wrong but doesn't notice that it might be wrong and question it.

So this evening we planned a new recipe from a Jamie Oliver book and I left it to him because I was out at an appointment. I said just follow the recipe. Jamie said use frozen mixed onion, carrot and celery but we don't have that nonexistent product so I got those vegetables in fresh. I didn't mention that to DH, didn't think it necessary. He decided to use the frozen mixed veg that we do have in, which is peas, sweetcorn, carrots and green beans. I don't understand why you would see "frozen onion, carrot and celery" and choose to use a frozen mix of completely different vegetables, rather than the same veg but fresh, and also apparently have never at any point considered that might be wrong. See it's not just misreading the recipe, it's also the fact that this veg is getting sauteed in oil and then add some vinegar and cook it off before adding chopped tomatoes. That's a REALLY WEIRD thing to do to peas and sweetcorn and he never considered that it was weird. He does more than half the cooking in our house and regularly makes pasta sauces that start with onion carrot and celery!

The meal was really nice anyway so I limited myself to a brief indignation then shut up about it and enjoyed the dinner.

There have been other times...like one time he made brownies from a jar recipe, and it said to mix together the dry ingredients then add eggs and bake. So because it didn't explicitly say to mix the eggs in, he poured them on top of the dry mix and put it in the oven like that. He said he was just following the instructions and they should have said to mix, but come on you're making brownies here, brownies do not consist of chocolate powder with baked eggs on top.

His visual memory is really bad, like he's a proper "kinesthetic learner" and doesn't seem to picture stuff in his head the way I do, which I've always struggled to understand and I wonder whether it's because when he's doing something he doesn't picture the end result as he's doing it, and therefore doesn't "see" a dish of powder with baked eggs on top of it, or pasta sauce with peas and sweetcorn as a base. Would love to hear from people whose brains work in the same way his does and who can fully understand making this type of mistake!

OP posts:
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FayCarew · 07/01/2024 11:53

@GlomOfNit , there's the complete opposite though. The cook who will add a strong flavour they like to something that doesn't go with it. It's usually something like cumin, cinnamon or chilli.

Cupcakes2024 · 07/01/2024 11:54

With google at our fingertips, it helps advance a recipe

FayCarew · 07/01/2024 12:47

@Cupcakes2024 . What do you mean by it helps advance a recipe?

It would help if the DH had looked up what the frozen medley was, but it wouldn't have told him to not use frozen mixed veg

Cupcakes2024 · 07/01/2024 13:14

FayCarew · 07/01/2024 12:47

@Cupcakes2024 . What do you mean by it helps advance a recipe?

It would help if the DH had looked up what the frozen medley was, but it wouldn't have told him to not use frozen mixed veg

I should of added more context, in the ops case her dh should of followed the recipe, with correct ingredients, then using google he could of researched improvements that could be made or added to improve the recipe, rather than pickling the recipe.

FayCarew · 07/01/2024 13:47

I don't think he would though, unless the recipe said why the base mix was used. I pretty much use a base mix (in my case, carrot, leek and celery) in most stews. I haven't really thought of why I use them other than they add flavour/sweetness/colour. I don't use onion so the leek is an onion substitute - boiled onion is rank and I rarely fry anything.

If I did a search for soffrito I'd get a list of supermarket mixed veg, frozen or fresh. The how to make your own would be near the bottom of the list.

The search added to following the recipe probably complicates things. You shoudn't need to if you are using a decent recipe.

StragglyTinsel · 07/01/2024 13:54

Cupcakes2024 · 07/01/2024 13:14

I should of added more context, in the ops case her dh should of followed the recipe, with correct ingredients, then using google he could of researched improvements that could be made or added to improve the recipe, rather than pickling the recipe.

The OP said it was nice - so the substitution clearly worked OK.

Maybe he thought it was an improvement. 🤷🏻‍♀️

BrightGreenMoonBuggy · 07/01/2024 13:57

I’m so sorry OP as this must be really frustrating but I really did laugh at him pouring eggs on top of the brownie mix and shoving it in the oven like that with no sense that his cake would be topped with several baked eggs…

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