Man in Tk Max today …

[Millymollymaisy]

I popped out alone today to my local Tk Max ( don’t know why it’s usually a failed visit but needed some time out the house ) I was browsing the bedding isle and a man came to the entrance of where I was standing and said more to himself but also to me ‘ oh wow she’s a lovely looking girl so lovely , yeah really nice ‘

i knew what I heard but dismissed it and didn’t look at him and he walked away. When I came downstairs to the ground floor he was there again in front of me and repeated almost talking to himself the same kind of things ‘ she’s so lovely wow she looks lovely what a lovely looking girl ‘ this time we locked eyes and walked past to the till.

I really don’t know why but it disturbed me ! I felt amongst scared ! While lining to pay I was looking to see where he now was and was worried about if he would come near me again or worse me waiting outside.

im 40 so not a girl. I’m attractive but never had an experience like this ( normally just looks but that’s normal for me wherever I go ) Any tips on what to do if this happens again? He never pushed it further or tried to directly talk to me it was more talking to himself about me out loud . Bizarre

Just ignore and avoid

I doubt something like that will happen again, just ignore, there's lots of oddballs out there.

WhT was his speech line in but more detail? was he muttering, speaking in a normal conversational tone etc
wondering about MH condition or medication side effect hence asking - also as it was unusual and weirded you out .

Have you never encountered a bit of a nutter before? Just ignore and move on, as you did.

Unsettling, definitely, but I don’t think there was anything else you needed to do.

I would also say, I’m sure you are attractive but I don’t think the type of things people like that mutter are always directly linked to the reality of the person they appear to be addressing, iyswim. Especially if it’s a repetitive form of words, or similar phrases again and again. So it’s maybe something he would have directed at quite a wide range of women, regardless of attractiveness or age (hence ‘girl’).

What I mean is — it probably wasn’t personal, although of course it’s still legit to feel uncomfortable. But you don’t need to internalise it as a genuine comment on you. It’s likely just his rambling.

Sounds like a common or garden nutter- don't give it any further thought.
There have always been people like this and there always will be. If it wasn't you he will have said it about someone else. Just blank it.

I was asked out in TK Maxx once, across a crowded clothes rail. I had to let him down gently and tell him I was married. It's the only time it's ever happened!

You're not wrong to have felt scared. Our instincts are there for a reason.

If it's never happened before in nearly 40 years it's not exactly likely to happen again.

This is in no way a comment on you OP because nothing in this scenario is in the first place but if anything it just sounds like he was unwell really and/or not really with it for whatever reason - drugs,mental illness, other difficulties. You just happened to be in the proximity. It even sounds like he's talking about someone else or something in his mind.

The staff will always assist you in a shop if you feel unsafe in the future.

Next time do a loud fart or turn around pulling an unattractive face or bark, that gets them to fuck off.

When i was a student, i was once followed around a large shop by a man holding a largish dead fish (wrapped in paper, but with head and tail sticking out) who would occasionally point it at me and say “FISH”.

i mean, he was right, but i’m not sure that helped the situation.

People can be odd. Just be happy you’re not them and can walk away from the odd.

In those circs you could have mentioned to the staff that there was a man saying inappropriate things at you. They have security. He may have been hanging around spouting that at a number of women.

No wonder you felt alarmed. Yes we’ve all encountered disturbed/boundary crossing people, and you have every right to feel freaked out by it.

@Sandia1 I was in TKmaxx in Manchester City Centre about 10-12 yrs ago and a random man proper kicked off being charged 10p for a bag- 'that's good ale money you are trying to charge me!! Cashier took the items out of the bag and said- take them as they are then! so he stomped out with his new pants in his hands.

He was probably ND, and/or suffering with mental health issues.

If you've quoted him verbatim, that sounds like he might have something going on - I've had a schizoid affective disorder - experiencing friend who would mutter things like this to himself as he was walking around. Its worrying, when it happens to you. If I hadn't known my friend at the time, I'd probably have freaked out. I was able to call his family and relay what was happening and it all contributed to his being seen and sectioned and diagnosed.

Did he have headphones on? I've started mumbling along to a song before without realising it and freaked out a random passerby.

Was he maybe wearing one of those earpiece headphones and talking to someone?

I think it sounds like MH issues too. If he'd been a regular sleaze (or possibly an OK guy trying his luck), he would have approached you; but talking about you in the third person when he must have known you'd be near enough to hear him does suggest some kind of vulnerability.

Exactly right!

Oh here we go. Man behaves inappropriately so someone sees fit to align predatory behaviour with autism. Just stop it.

Sounds like he has a mental health condition. Ignore and go about your day

Creepy but probably harmless. Ignore but make sure he does not follow you or find out where you live.
Stalkers are sometimes stranger nutters who develop an obsession.

Considering he was talking to himself, I think it's a fair shout that he has a mental condition or mental health problem. It's literally a symptom.
That said, OP was perfectly correct and within her rights to feel weirded out/scared by it.

@Fionaville maybe. Maybe he was also trying to find covert ways to invade her space, knowing full well what he was doing. Whichever way you look at it, his behaviour was predatory. I am not surprised the OP was scared - I would have been too. In fact, I've had similar experiences before.

Any tips on what to do if this happens again?

Just ignore, as you did.

I’m surprised this is the first time it’s happened if you’re 40.

I was stalked by a man in the high street aged 14 and asked out in the high street by a man in his 30s when I was 15. When I told him I was 15 he said ‘So?’ 🤮