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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder what the best way of reducing scrolling and time on social media is

93 replies

Fl100p555 · 30/12/2023 06:07

The default way seems to be to go cold turkey and just delete apps however there are good parts of SM I wish to keep and I think deleting isn’t necessarily realistic. Or is it?

I want to reduce my hours on it and scrolling hugely though.

Would setting a time and limits work? Has anybody got any suggestions or found anything that works? What is the ideal amount of time to allow in a day? I was thinking of maybe an hour.

OP posts:
Sylver75 · 30/12/2023 06:14

Saw this on Threads posted by Bressie (Irish musician & mindfulness coach)

Try it for 2024
Tier one - All social media apps on phone turned off between 7pm till 7am next day
Tier two - Tier one plus social media apps off 11am-1pm each day
Tier three - tier one and two, plus social media apps off between 3-5pm

Aim is to get to tier 3.

lljkk · 30/12/2023 06:17

Delete the MN App for a start.

Original poster
Fl100p555 · 30/12/2023 06:21

Sylver75

That sounds interesting.
Did he give any time frames and does he include other scrolling with that?

OP posts:
Loubelle70 · 30/12/2023 06:24

I don't know...i tried to limit time on sm...but in end i just deleted them all..not been in them for around 6 year and mentally i feel a lot better

Chowit · 30/12/2023 06:29

Just put your phone down and go do something else.

Jifmicroliquid · 30/12/2023 07:07

Following this with interest as I’m a dreadful scroller and I hate it. I can’t seem to stop, mostly at night.

biggreenboat · 30/12/2023 07:10

Just delete. I tried various methods of restricting it but no success. Deleted Instagram and Facebook on 1st Dec and haven't looked back. Screen time has gone from 4+ hours a day to around 2. I'd say my MN usage has gone up, but it doesn't have the same grab as the nice shiny videos do so doesn't seem as bad.

I only deleted the apps. Didn't go as far as deleting the accounts, so they're ticking over in the background should I decide to dip back in.

The annoying thing is that sometimes they were the easiest place to find information, for example opening times of local cafe over Christmas posted only on Instagram.

Earhell · 30/12/2023 07:13

At night time, either when going to sleep or if I wake, I put an audio book on. I find if I wake in the night my brain starts going and I would use my phone to distract me. I can fall asleep to an audio book better.
I have no answer to the rest. I tend to go for mindless stim games.

Original poster
Fl100p555 · 30/12/2023 07:16

It’s not easy to just put my phone down. I have ADHD. I wish I could just dip in and out as I do find some things useful on Instagram. Ditto MN however they probably cause the most scrolling.Would definitely not miss Facebook. Do friends know you’ve deleted. Is it just ticking away to come back as normal after shoukd you wish to? I am good with setting times/rules sometimes.

How much scrolling/SM time is ok?

OP posts:
Original poster
Fl100p555 · 30/12/2023 07:16

I’m thinking of charging downstairs and getting an alarm clock so when I go up to bed that’s it.

OP posts:
DustyOwl · 30/12/2023 07:27

i have deleted the apps and have a time limit but I just go online on a browser and I override my screen time blockers. I’ve blocked fb videos but I’m STILL on it and I don’t even know what I’m looking at half the time.
I’m fully addicted.
whatsapp is probably what I spend a massive amount of time on but I can’t delete that as so many of the kids stuff is on it.

So, new plan, charge the phone downstairs and get an alarm clock. I have new books to read at night. Log out of fb on safari. I’m really going to try to stick to my down time but it’s really tough. Wish me luck!

erinaceus · 30/12/2023 07:30

Two things helped me:

Can you bear to leave one platform entirely? I left Facebook about five years ago. This was a good decision for me. I deleted the apps from my devices for a bit and later on deleted my account entirely.

I try to have a screen free hour every morning (or at least I was doing this earlier in the year). I concentrate on doing something else and not impulsively picking up my phone during that hour.

Good luck, these apps are designed to be compulsive.

Original poster
Fl100p555 · 30/12/2023 07:41

I find endless scrolling about things I’m interested in just as bad and yes think I’d over ride hence wondering about time limits. I wonder how much keeps you not addicted iykwim.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fl100p555 · 30/12/2023 07:41

Yes could def cope with deleting FB.

OP posts:
usernother · 30/12/2023 08:21

I leave my phone upstairs which helps a bit.

Summerbee3 · 30/12/2023 08:28

The longest I’ve been able to stay off FB and Instagram was 3 weeks and I felt so much better, but I always go back. It’s so annoying. I’ve spend far too much time scrolling over Christmas, I so bad about it. I feel like I’m wasting my life.

Unmute · 30/12/2023 08:37

I put my phone display in greyscale when I need a break from mindless scrolling. There's an option under vision in the accessibility settings.

Without colour it's a lot less addictive.

LoreleiG · 30/12/2023 08:41

I had this quandary for years. In the end I had followed so many random groups and people on Facebook that it made it really unenjoyable and lost interest - I can’t be bothered to look now.

Mirrorballsocial · 30/12/2023 08:45

My problem is mumsnet and tiktok! For me it boredom. So craft activities are good. Things like easy knitting, cross stitch and sticker books. But I have to have them to hand.

I struggle when I feel low to motivate myself so yesterday when I felt very pre menstrual I had a lit of screen time.

kshaw · 30/12/2023 08:47

In settings on Android there's 'digital wellbeing', can set timers on each app to stop the app when hit the limits. I've just started and it's doing me good. I've included MN on that!

User562377 · 30/12/2023 08:49

I read the book How to break Up With Your Phone. I installed an app called StayFree which monitors how much time you spend on your phone. The first recommendation in the book was just to be aware of how much time you actually spend, how many times in a day you turn your phone on. I was horrified by my results. I'm now trying some of the other suggestions but seeing the numbers in front of me was a wake up call for sure.

Offcom · 30/12/2023 09:09

Diagnosed ADHD too!

I rearranged all my apps earlier this year and put Instagram and Twitter in a folder called Distractions along with other apps I enjoy, like word puzzles. Quite often opening the folder means I choose e.g. the crossword app rather than social media – I’m fine with that as I don’t really see the difference to doing a crossword on paper. Also just moving apps helps as it can give you a second to realise what you’re doing and make a more proactive choice rather than opening an app out of habit

On Instagram I turn off suggested posts for 30 days at a time so my feed is only who I follow and ads. I also mainly log in with my hobby account and rarely look at my original personal feed – fewer follows, less obligation to like/comment

Elon’s really done me a favour by making Twitter very unappealing – the app is still there but I rarely open it.

It could be worth clearing cookies on your smartphone browser so you have to choose to log in again to access sites – make that ADHD work for you by adding obstacles which might distract you for long enough to move on!

In January I’m going to try leaving my phone in another room overnight – I know it helps me sleep but so hard to keep it up. (Edited cos I was embarrassed at using FOUR [4] exclamation marks 😳)

Berl29 · 30/12/2023 09:12

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

SutWytTi · 30/12/2023 09:16

Chowit · 30/12/2023 06:29

Just put your phone down and go do something else.

I love these simplistic responses.

Like 'just stop smoking' or 'just stop drinking' or the best of all, 'just stop worrying'.

TodayForTomorrow · 30/12/2023 09:19

It's helped me to delete the worst apps; mine were instagram and mumsnet. Haven't had the Facebook or twitter apps for years. I can still access them via Safari browser but they're less
visible to me that way so I'm not prompted as often.

I've disabled all notifications on my phone apart from whatsapps and phone calls, including the red dots. I found that I was opening apps to clear the red dots and then getting sucked in.

I physically put my phone away from me when I want to concentrate on something else.

I'm using more audiobooks and podcasts with blue tooth earbuds as I can have my phone away from me and still listen to something interesting, whilst doing something else rather than scrolling.