Anyone else sick of this already?

[Shameless989]

just a rant really. I’ve done literally everything- food shop, bought and wrapped all gifts . Everything. Kids arguing non stop. Husband hasn’t even bought be so much as a candle. I look forward to this every year and I wonder why. Organise nice days out everyone ends up arguing. No one wants anything other than a screen. Anyone else?

Stop doing it

Easier said than done with 3 young children to attempt to make it nice for.

I hear you OP. All I want to sit by the fire eating toast and reading my book. Fuck the turkey TBH

I want to cancel all plans tomorrow. Been pissed off with DH the past two days over Christmas crap and I'm no longer look forward to tomorrow and just want it over

How old are DC?

Op its hard your right. My kids much older but my mother can be awkward. Then moods. Im exhausted after it all.

I hear ya and I feel ya @Shameless989 I have always done everything. Just fell into that trap - been married nearly 30 years.., Did 90% of the childcare, and the shopping, cooking, cleaning, washing, grunt work, life admin, and always everything at Christmas.

My 2 female adult DC sent me a notice of the internet the other day that said...

...growing up and realising all along that the Christmas magic you were always in awe of, was really just a mum who loved you very very much working hard in the background quietly, to make sure things were magical...

I showed DH and said 'awww isn't that sweet?' He sulked for a few minutes, and said 'anyone would think they preferred you to me.'

I said 'oh do grow up! They say this/think this because it WAS me doing every-fucking-thing, while you were sat on your arse watching TV, out partaking in your hobbies, or out with your mates.'

Yep men may not be arsed with the kids when they're little, but it does bite them in the arse later on, when the kids are much closer to their mums!

tl;dr not much help - and I don't think there is much you can do about it, as this behaviour has been pretty much set in stone by you. But your DH will regret it later on.

Thank you @FreshWinterMorning feeling a bit tearful this evening as it never lives up
to what I think. I can’t cope with the kids constantly arguing it just drains me.
they are 8 7 and 4. What a lovely
quote for your kids to send you x

If they are always arguing I certainly wouldn’t be taking them anywhere special. Can do with running round the park but that would be it. I would also throw them at DH and go and have some peace

Same, @Shameless989

Kids are 7 and 4 and I'm just so done with this.

The 7 year old has been awful all day. So much crying. I just don't have the energy (or the inclination) to placate him anymore.

I try so hard to create the "magic" but really they don't give a fck about the magic. They just desperately want presents to open. Presents to open and then instantly forget and barely look at again.

After the stress of last year I said was going to keep it simple this year. It's as simple as I could make it but they are still so wound up about it and I just hate it.

There are so many of these threads. I really hope all these posters rethink next year. It does not have to be like this. You don’t have to keep doing this to yourselves. Where is YOUR magic? Next year…..focus on and find it.

I hear you. I do 95% of everything Christmas related. Right now I am looking at the tree decorated by me, all the presents bought and wrapped by me, the hand made wreath and lights created by me. The fridge is full of food bought by me,the cake baked by me ....

I lost my shit esrlier when l caught dh chilling in his chair. Said VERY loudly it's my Christmas too and he, my sister and daughter all jumped up and helped. I mean in an ideal world, it would never have got to that point but they all got tue message and l won't be a martyr tomorrow! Mark my words!!

Sending good wishes and good vibes your way @Shameless989 I hope Christmas is still good for you.

Yep…and sad because I love Christmas..or once did

Totally with you, OP. Slightly lost my shit with the kids tonight as they were literally bouncing off the walls screaming and carrying on while I was trying to usher them up to bed. I know they are excited so it's unfair of me. I'm just tired. It really is all a bit thankless until they are old enough to realise the magic was down to you. Mine are 7, 4 and 1 so that's decades off yet. I do 100% of the gifts, food, activities while DH does nothing. That probably doesn't help things.

Mines worse

If I ask him to help, I usually regret it

That's family life though isn't it? A bit of chaos, kids bickering.

You need to ask hubby to step up and start helping but aside from that, perhaps lower your expectations and try to enjoy the little things.

Relax and stop pretending Christmas happens by magic.

I hope you’re not giving his presents, OP? Return them and buy yourself something you love.

Don’t do anything special for him, concentrate on your kids and give him lots of jobs, like all the washing up.

we’ve had a bit of a rubbish evening, despite efforts. Dh and dd arguing, the dogs eaten something it shouldn’t. Toddler’s constipated, whinging and overtired. Luckily dh more than pulls his weight but he’s grumpy. We’ve had a difficult year with bereavement and ill health in the family. So much pressure to make everything magical. Will try again tomorrow

Lovely of you to make an effort for your children, they’ll remember it.
Is your husband always a miserable git?! Mine isn’t a huge lover of Christmas but he does all the running around and cooking. He also did an alcohol and snack run earlier.

Could you play some board games with the children? Do they always have a lot of screen time? (Not judging, we’re all busy) but if they are used to screens it’s hard if you expect them to ditch them one day of the year.
If it’s just you doing everything then perhaps you need to scale things down a bit- it’s a ton of pressure otherwise.
Have a bath, glass of wine or a cuppa and relax. Hope you have a lovely day tomorrow.

I can completely relate OP. The years of creating a magical Christmas has drained me to the point where there is no joy. The last few Christmas' have been full of dread and I just get through it reminding myself it's one day and as one human being I can not live up the the social media expectations that are feed to kids.
It's very sad.

I ditched my DS's dad a long time ago because he was useless. I'm nobody's skivvy and will not live with a man who doesn't do anything. Christmas and life in general is much less stressful being single.

I think Christmas gets worse each year. I don't know if it's because of social media and the pressure to have a 'magical Christmas ' living up to Instagram standards. Christmas Eve boxes, matching family PJ's , elf on the shelf etc. Women doing all the present buying, decorations, shopping, wrapping, cooking etc whilst the men do sod all (not generalising but seems to be a common theme judging by most of the posts). Relatives falling out, worrying there's not enough food for what is essentially one day, arguing about who has bought what, what they didn't get, didn't want etc. Does anyone actually enjoy it really?. I remember Christmas as a kid (I'm 52) and I had a stocking with soap on a rope, a yo-yo, sweets, stickers etc and I was delighted! I realise times have moved on from the 70's ! But, Christmas wasn't nearly as stressful as it is now because we didn't have social media rammed down our throats of what the perfect Christmas was meant to look like. Anyway, on that cheerful note... Merry Christmas everyone 😉🎄🎅