To wonder why you are spending Christmas Day alone and how you feel about it?

Whathappenstomyal · 2023-12-24T20:03:46+00:00

I’ll start :- In my fifties with no children NC with toxic family (Mother and siblings. Father is dead) Recently separated from partner of 20 years No friends. I feel fine about being on own this Christmas after a lot of miserable ones in recent years with ex-partner. No Christmas food in so just planning to go for a walk and then catch up with the housework. How are others feeling about being on their own tomorrow?

Original poster

Whathappenstomyal · 24/12/2023 20:14

I’m the only one then 😭😭

OP posts:

Dazedandconfused10 · 24/12/2023 20:16

Everyone else has alternative plans... I'm looking forward to a day of rest, eating shit food and watching shit TV

Christmasdistress · 24/12/2023 20:20

No living family.

My partner failed to tell me about which days he has his DC over Christmas despite me asking repeatedly since October, and their mum being an amicable co-parent who likes to plan ahead.

So I couldn't make a plan for an adult friend Christmas dinner party, as I usually would, in case the young DC were there, and couldn't plan for DC because I didn't know when they'd be here. I've bought DC and him a bunch of presents, he's bought nothing as he's hugely in debt and been unemployed for over a year.

On the 22nd, still not knowing, I asked for clarification, to which he got angry and escalated everything, pushed me into a wall, stormed out and stayed out overnight, and then finally, after much texting from me, said that he's now in a city 2 hours drive away with his DC at his brother's.

So I'm completely alone at Christmas, in a lot of pain because being pushed into a wall fucked up an old back injury, and now single because I sure as hell am not putting up with that behaviour.

We've lived together 2 years and been together 4.
Arsehole.

AddictedtoStarmix · 24/12/2023 20:23

My first year totally on my own and looking forward to it!
Children are adults and spending the day with their partner/other parent.
My mother is spending the day with my brother so all accounted for. I have been invited to several places for the day but have little time off work this year and relishing the time to rest.
I will head down to the local pub at lunch time to say hello to a few people, but will otherwise enjoy the solitude and please myself for the day.

IKnowAPlace · 24/12/2023 20:25

Broke up with my ex in the summer, no family nearby, close family travel every Christmas.

It's my second time ever but I feel okay about it. Maybe next year I'll take the dog to a hotel!

Original poster

Whathappenstomyal · 24/12/2023 20:26

Christmasdistress · 24/12/2023 20:20

No living family.

My partner failed to tell me about which days he has his DC over Christmas despite me asking repeatedly since October, and their mum being an amicable co-parent who likes to plan ahead.

So I couldn't make a plan for an adult friend Christmas dinner party, as I usually would, in case the young DC were there, and couldn't plan for DC because I didn't know when they'd be here. I've bought DC and him a bunch of presents, he's bought nothing as he's hugely in debt and been unemployed for over a year.

On the 22nd, still not knowing, I asked for clarification, to which he got angry and escalated everything, pushed me into a wall, stormed out and stayed out overnight, and then finally, after much texting from me, said that he's now in a city 2 hours drive away with his DC at his brother's.

So I'm completely alone at Christmas, in a lot of pain because being pushed into a wall fucked up an old back injury, and now single because I sure as hell am not putting up with that behaviour.

We've lived together 2 years and been together 4.
Arsehole.

Sorry to hear that @Christmasdistress, he definitely sounds like a total arsehole and you are better off without him.
I hope you can enjoy a relaxing day anyway xx

OP posts:

Laguinda · 24/12/2023 20:26

I will be alone, looking after my very recently spayed dog. Am fine with this, haven’t ‘done’ Christmas for years. Best Christmas ever was when recently separated from ex, and blasted through endless Dickens novels. Would usually go for a walk, but not possible this year. Will snuggle on the sofa with dog and book 😊. Have a lovely stress-free Christmas day OP.

Longlive · 24/12/2023 20:30

DH is on a long shift so will be out by 6am and not home till gone 9pm. DS, DDIL & DGD are having Christmas at home this year as have a tiny puppy that can't be left and our old 13 year old staffy wouldn't put up with it.

We had Christmas yesterday before puppy arrived and when DH was off.

Will spend the day on the sofa watching what I want on TV munching on leftovers and chocs. Bliss

Original poster

Whathappenstomyal · 24/12/2023 20:30

Laguinda · 24/12/2023 20:26

I will be alone, looking after my very recently spayed dog. Am fine with this, haven’t ‘done’ Christmas for years. Best Christmas ever was when recently separated from ex, and blasted through endless Dickens novels. Would usually go for a walk, but not possible this year. Will snuggle on the sofa with dog and book 😊. Have a lovely stress-free Christmas day OP.

Thanks, You too @Laguinda
I’d rather be on my own than spend another miserable Christmas with bastard ex-partner.

OP posts:

Sarah2891 · 24/12/2023 20:31

Just want to wish you a Merry Christmas, OP. Everyone else in this thread too 😊🎄

Iknowtheyareusefulstorage · 24/12/2023 20:31

I'll be on my own.
DD with boyfriend's family, DS with exH and DP with his mother.
I have had invites from lovely friends but am actually quite looking forward to a relaxed day.
Going to make myself a mini Christmas dinner with the bits I like, I have bought a load of books from 2nd hand book shop and will raise a glass to all x
Merry Christmas everyone x

Original poster

Whathappenstomyal · 24/12/2023 20:32

Sarah2891 · 24/12/2023 20:31

Just want to wish you a Merry Christmas, OP. Everyone else in this thread too 😊🎄

Edited

Thanks @Sarah2891 😀

OP posts:

theduchessofspork · 24/12/2023 20:34

Christmasdistress · 24/12/2023 20:20

No living family.

My partner failed to tell me about which days he has his DC over Christmas despite me asking repeatedly since October, and their mum being an amicable co-parent who likes to plan ahead.

So I couldn't make a plan for an adult friend Christmas dinner party, as I usually would, in case the young DC were there, and couldn't plan for DC because I didn't know when they'd be here. I've bought DC and him a bunch of presents, he's bought nothing as he's hugely in debt and been unemployed for over a year.

On the 22nd, still not knowing, I asked for clarification, to which he got angry and escalated everything, pushed me into a wall, stormed out and stayed out overnight, and then finally, after much texting from me, said that he's now in a city 2 hours drive away with his DC at his brother's.

So I'm completely alone at Christmas, in a lot of pain because being pushed into a wall fucked up an old back injury, and now single because I sure as hell am not putting up with that behaviour.

We've lived together 2 years and been together 4.
Arsehole.

Well you know what you New Year’s resolution is anyway.

Have a great party next year

Peepshowcreepshow · 24/12/2023 20:36

DD is at her dad's. I'd rather be on my own than trying to fit into someone else's Christmas, not in a snarky way, just not my thing. Done it many times now, found my own rhythm with it (unlike my first alone when I cried for 72 hours...). Eat what I like, drink champagne, watch crap, read books. Very nice, and, really, it's 24 hours and done. @Christmasdistress I hope you will be ok, better alone than with what you faced xx

HannahinHampshire · 24/12/2023 20:42

I’ve spent the last 10 Christmases with my elderly mum in Scotland. Sadly she died just before Christmas last year. I thought that perhaps one of my (two) sons would invite me to theirs this year but they’re spending Christmas with their other halves families. I won’t lie, it stings - but I’ll be OK. Have posh wine and a piece of salmon for tea, looking forward to it.

CrunchyCarrot · 24/12/2023 20:45

You're not the only one OP! I've no family, my DP has gone to spend Xmas and New Year with his elderly mum, fine by me as she had a stroke and can't travel to us, I cannot travel there due to my health issues. I am absolutely fine with it, I am having a peaceful and relaxing time just doing my own thing.

Hope all of you others also spending it alone have a relaxing time!

EnterFunnyNameHere · 24/12/2023 20:46

Christmasdistress · 24/12/2023 20:20

No living family.

My partner failed to tell me about which days he has his DC over Christmas despite me asking repeatedly since October, and their mum being an amicable co-parent who likes to plan ahead.

So I couldn't make a plan for an adult friend Christmas dinner party, as I usually would, in case the young DC were there, and couldn't plan for DC because I didn't know when they'd be here. I've bought DC and him a bunch of presents, he's bought nothing as he's hugely in debt and been unemployed for over a year.

On the 22nd, still not knowing, I asked for clarification, to which he got angry and escalated everything, pushed me into a wall, stormed out and stayed out overnight, and then finally, after much texting from me, said that he's now in a city 2 hours drive away with his DC at his brother's.

So I'm completely alone at Christmas, in a lot of pain because being pushed into a wall fucked up an old back injury, and now single because I sure as hell am not putting up with that behaviour.

We've lived together 2 years and been together 4.
Arsehole.

Enjoy your Christmas present to yourself of your freedom from this utter wanker and your peace of mind moving forward. Sending you the best of best wishes for 2024.

DontListenToWhatYouveConsumed · 24/12/2023 20:56

I choose to be alone Xmas day.
Son in law is an aggressive, gaslighting arsehole and I'd much rather do my own thing.
DD & kids come another day & do our Xmas.

ArseyAnnabelle · 24/12/2023 20:56

I'm spending Christmas on my own too. No family and I split up with my toxic ex earlier this year.

I've stuffed my fridge with party nibbles and wine. Looking forward to snuggling with the dog and relaxing

tearsandtiaras · 24/12/2023 20:58

Im ill and wasn't up to the drive to see extended family. I sent DD there today to enjoy the festivities. I will try to join on boxing day. Never spent xmas day alone before. Will see how it goes. Hopefully easily

IjustbelieveinMe · 24/12/2023 21:00

This is my second year spending Xmas on my own with my dog. Last year I volunteered but this year I am going to walk my dog, go for a run, cook a chilli concarne with tortilla shells and a bottle of red wine and watch Maestro.
No pressure and all on my own time and agenda. It's not a big thing to me at all. All my family are on the other side of the world.

But sending love and hugs to those who are on their own and might be struggling

PostItInABook · 24/12/2023 21:00

My dad is recovering from cancer treatment and is really, really frail and has realised he can’t cope with the 4 hour journey to mine. Mum doesn’t want to leave him.
I don’t have anyone to look after my cats at short notice and feel bad asking anyone at Christmas so I can’t go to theirs.
My brother and SIL are having their own family Xmas.
I haven’t told any of my friends I’m going to be on my own in case one of them feels obliged to invite me and creates unnecessary stress for themselves.
I’m fine though. Quite looking forward to a chilled out day with some champagne, a new book and a lovely, long bubble bath, plus we all managed to get together a couple of weeks ago at my mum and dads so it’s not like we haven’t seen each other.

MichaelAndEagle · 24/12/2023 21:04

Peepshowcreepshow · 24/12/2023 20:36

DD is at her dad's. I'd rather be on my own than trying to fit into someone else's Christmas, not in a snarky way, just not my thing. Done it many times now, found my own rhythm with it (unlike my first alone when I cried for 72 hours...). Eat what I like, drink champagne, watch crap, read books. Very nice, and, really, it's 24 hours and done. @Christmasdistress I hope you will be ok, better alone than with what you faced xx

Same sort of thing here.
I feel the same about being at someone else's house especially with their kids.
Ditto, about the first one being the worst.

ArcticBells · 24/12/2023 21:17

On my own out of choice as I'm burnt out from work and need quiet time to recharge. I'm fortunate to enjoy being alone

GinBooksChocs · 24/12/2023 21:41

On call for work. Have nice food in and will do some phys.

I'm looking forward to it.

To those of you in tough situations, I hope they improve in the new year.