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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To pop off to the pub after work

55 replies

toyoloit · 21/12/2023 18:06

Is it normal? Have I the right to be a bit annoyed?

my DP would sometimes go to the pub after work for 2-3 hours this would happen sometimes once a week sometimes once a month , although there has been times where he has came home and said he hasn’t been to the pub but I later found out he intact HAS been to the pub, he works a job where everyday he finishes at different times there’s no really set time tbh but never usually after 4 in the winter , so for all I know he could be there everyday ???

I’m currently on maternity leave as our baby is 4 months old , I haven’t even as much got a shower today as I need to wait for dp to return home to watch baby

It’s now 6pm I can’t get a hold of him , I know for a fact where he is , AIBU to be annoyed? I think I’m more annoyed that I stay at home all day and can’t even as much as get a shower but he can finish work and pop to the pub . I’ve discussed this with him before and he said it’s a lad thing he’s allowed (immature I know)

I’ll be very interested to see if he denies being at the pub - he is 100% not at work it’s 6pm there’s a serious storm and he works outside in the freezing cold it’s too dark

anyone else’s partner do this ???? Is it acceptable???? Am I being ridiculous?

OP posts:
notacooldad · 22/12/2023 07:25

Good god, can we please stop piling on the poor woman about the shower situation?! It's not what the post is about!
It's a side issue where the op has created a problem that needn't be there. It is something that is bothering her as well as dh going to the pub.

amylou8 · 22/12/2023 07:36

Mine ex was like this. Considered it his right to peruse his hobbies, out multiple times a week and away frequently. Meanwhile if I wanted to anything it required several weeks notice and him being such a martyr it just wasn't worth the effort. I remember going to a friend who had just received terrible news, only for him to insist I had to get home because he needed to go to some club or another. Needless to say we divorced when the youngest was 3. Things didn't improve, contact, whilst regular, was completely at his convenience.

Lucytheloose · 23/12/2023 11:50

toyoloit · 21/12/2023 18:33

@notacooldad are you serious 🤣 maybe id much rather not have my baby sit in steam ? But I also would much rather ENJOY my shower instead of feeling the need to rush , so I would obviously much rather dp watch her whilst I can take a shower without worrying ? Btw when I say steam I mean STEAM like the whole bathroom is steamed it looks Smokey you can't see

Can't you open a window?

toyoloit · 23/12/2023 15:41

He ended up coming home at 10pm, clearly very drunk but stated he didn't go to the pub he went to the town centre to Christmas shop but came home with no shopping 😳 baring in mind he was SEEN at the pub by a friend of mine. This issue runs a lot bigger than me not 'being able to shower'

OP posts:
ginasevern · 23/12/2023 16:41

OP, if he wants to live like a lad tell him to pack his bags and do just that. He can't be a lad and a dad. Tell him to make his choice or you will make it for him. Immature pricks like him make me sick.

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