Teacher gift collection

[Purpleturtle45]

Every year I organise a collection at Christmas and Summer for my kids teachers and usually buy vouchers for somewhere nice. I always make it very clear that any amount is welcome and of course only donate if you want to. Some parents might want to do their own thing, or nothing which is their decision.

Most parents are very grateful for this as it gives them one less thing to do and they probably get away with donating less for a joint present than they would trying buy something themselves for £5-£10.

It has come to my attention though that some local authorities are banning this due to cost of living and parents potentially feeling under pressure do donate. Wondering people's thoughts on this? I think people should be allowed to make their own choices on this and think a ban would be very unreasonable.

YANBU- Collections are fine as long as there is no pressure/set amount

YABU- Collections should be banned

I’m that parent this year, mainly because no one else wanted to do it but still wanted a collection to be organised and it’s always been easier for me to just throw in.
I didn’t give an amount or keep an eye on who’d donated because it was late in the day and I’m just not really arsed. Now I’ve thought about it I think for those who can’t afford to give anything it’s actually better this way than all the kids taking something in and giving to the teacher individually and them not having anything to give iykwim. I’m signing the card from the whole class so the teachers / kids don’t have a clue who’s put in or hasn’t and the teachers get a decent gift and not 30 mugs.

I’m not disagreeing that teachers work very hard and deserve to be paid better.

however, starting salaries for qualified teachers is £30k. Bang on average income. Therefore I think we can expect that the average classroom contains 50% of kids whose parents are on the same or less income than teachers.

If you have a large income and want to give great gifts - awesome. But £10 x 3 per child (to cover teacher and TA’s) is a hell of a lot of money. You get that there are people who can’t afford food or gifts for their own family right?

YABU. I absolutely hate the underlying thought process that a parent should purchase anything for a teacher for doing their job. At its most basic it is purchasing favour with a teacher and i do not believe any child/parent should be made to feel that they have to 'cough up'.

It stinks of haves and have nots, bribery and favouritism. If they need gifts/presents/rewards then join them on the picket line when they strike.

As a parent I think the collections are brilliant. We usually put in £5 for the teacher and TA (this year £6 so it was easier to split between a job share). If they didn’t do it I’d be buying each of them wine/flowers/chocolates and it would be much more expensive!
Our WhatsApp doesn’t put any pressure on and people don’t know who has contributed or who hasn’t and I’m just gratefully to the person sorting it!
My only disappointment with it is I’d like DS to be giving someone so he can see the value of it but he has made them pictures so hopefully that’s covered.

As a teacher, I never expect anything but some of my pupils love to give gifts so they do that and there’s a collection which some do. I’ve had children make me things and others tell me they don’t give gifts and I tell them that I am grateful to have all of them in my class and seeing them trying so hard and making our classroom a lovely place is what I really want!
A couple of years ago I received a card from someone’s grandma which was the loveliest thing I’ve ever read just thanking me so much and saying how her GC loves my lessons; it made me cry!

It’s so amazing that so many parents appreciate teachers and want to share that in some way. Just supporting us through the year is all we need but it’s also lovely that children want to give and show thanks - I’ve had lots of drawings and cards made this year too.

You have a point about teachers possibly subconsciously putting in more effort for children who have appreciative parents, but I think a parent’s attitude throughout the year is more likely to have an effect on that in primary schools where gift giving is much more prevalent and parents and teachers have much more contact. Primary and secondary are very different so the considerations are not the same. Primary is when parents need most support from teachers themselves so they may have genuine reason to be personally thankful, and it when parents should be teaching their children to appreciate the people that care for and educate them.

If anything, class collections would go some way towards preventing favouritism that could come from gifts because almost everyone has given the same or the staff are unaware if it if they haven’t. I have enough faith in teachers that I don’t believe a couple of gifts are going to make a difference to how they do their jobs.

I really wish the school or LA would ban this. Even when it starts with the best of intentions (no pressure, any amount acceptable, whole class on card etc.) it often ends up hijacked by the power mummy with the list; keeping track of all and chasing up via message and turns into a shit show.

Primary school teachers in the main are great, they do a tough job. However I don’t see them as more deserving of a gift than any other public servant role. Secondary teachers get nothing, neither do GPs, health & safety inspectors, traffic wardens (!), community police, planning officers - none of them.

Most roles have to report gifts to avoid allegations of taking a backhander. By all means get the child to give a card to a great teacher but please pack in this biannual farce at Christmas and end of academic year. I’ve no idea how it got so big, but really wish it hadn’t.

Conflict of interest? I have seen it all.
I have not met a single teacher who would favourable treat a student who offered them chocolates over someone who didnt, how does favourable treatment work anyways in your case? Exams are externally marked, we see kids twice a week. Would you mark a book better? Or smile more often? What a ridiculous idea.

Are you suggesting that any teacher would openly admit to favouring a child because their mummy gave them a gift. That would be an extremely stupid teacher. Doesnt mean it doesnt happen and is fundamentally the basis of BRIBERY LAW. You dont even have to have the intentions to be guilty of bribery.

Its been the case for decades that there are kids who are popular, invested in everything, able to attend everything because their parents can afford all the school trips, outside activities, usually quite clever because, surprise surprise their parents can help more, parents help out with school activities too because they have spare time etc etc etc. This is just an extension of that and another case of the have nots being put in their little box to keep quiet, tick the boxes and made to fight the system.

As i say, support the teachers next time they strike.

I always preferred to stick a tenner in a collection and not have to concern myself with additional gift buying, gift bags, cards etc.

I think the arguments against collections mostly stem from how they are done rather than their existence altogether.

The Department for Education mandated that all schools keep a register of gifts to staff & schools will be questioned during their annual audit about it & specifically about any large gifts.

I suspect that the large teacher class gifts are more private school where there are less constraints and more money.

TBH I think most staff would happily accept a ban on student/parent gifts as we'd rather the money went on yhe children - a card, letter or picture is fine.

Name changed for this as outing. This year at DS’s school a new parent organised the gift and basically put that she wanted £100 per parent. Whilst this is a private school it is also a school with very high numbers of bursary awards and military children. Collection was for 2 teachers so each got £1500. It was genuinely sickening. DS is there on a 100% bursary and we didn’t contribute because we literally didn’t have £100 to give to it.

I think it's much nicer to gift individual cards and little chocolates and things, because then the children can give their teachers these things themselves and wish them a merry Christmas and have the teacher say thankyou/merry Christmas back individually. You bypass that child/teacher moment by just handing over a fiver to someone on the pta.

Having said that I don't agree with an actual ban on a collective gift.

If it's a conflict of interest then surely group present is better as the teacher doesn't know who has contributed what

I worked in secondary for 10 years. Across 4 schools, if there was any favouritism, it had nothing to do with getting a mug someone may or may not have got for Xmas. I kid you not. Still would love to see how favouritism in Maths, Geography or Science lesson would look like, have not seen many examples.
I also saw hoardes of kids from very deprived backgrounds doing amazing, getting main roles in school plays, winning competitions and whatnot. The fact a minority of teachers in some schools (private I presume?) favour kids whose parents help out does not mean it's the 'norm'. It's such a petty view that all teachers do it I am still laughing reading those posts. Except it's really not funny.
It's just sad that even at this time of the year teachers are being bashed because a few parents feel a bit sour.
Are you feeling inadequate as a parent? Do you have inferiority complex?
If the answer to both is no, it should not matter to you that some teacher out there will feel appreciated while enjoying. a box of Maltesers given to them by a student.
If yes, then dont project your feelings onto others.

There’s nothing stopping you from giving a card or small gesture to any other role you see fit, unless it’s illegal for any reason in their particular job. I have a friend in hospital this week and I’ll be taking in chocolates and biscuits for the nurses. I also tip the postman, milkman, window cleaner, if we saw the same GP more than once or had a local police presence I’d certainly give him/her a Christmas card and box of chocs.

That said, as much as traffic wardens and planning inspectors etc are valuable, they don’t care for people’s 5 year olds on a daily basis! You can’t compare.

YABU. Why on earth should teachers receive any kind of gift from parents? They are doing their job when they aren't on leave, strike, INSET days, Occasional days, broken boiler days. Do you have a whip round for the caretaker/cleaners/lunch staff too?

Christ that’s a bit miserable. Why buy anyone a present then?! Why buy your mum a present, isn’t it just her job to be your mum?
Teachers care for your children 6 hours a day 5 days a week and you begrudge them a box of chocs at Xmas?

As far as I understand there is at least one local authority in scotland that does this and another that considered it and yes it was in a paper daily mail headline style if I remember correctly.
No school boards here for state schools, all schools run by local authority.

A wonderful mum does ours.

A fiver each or whatever you can afford.

Occasionally a few parents say (or don't say)That they'll do their own thing, I have once. Absolutely no pressure.

Result: teachers and TAs over the years have received vouchers/ favourite chocolates or a bottle of something /one special mug etc.

It's sooo much more affordable than buying bits of this and that from each family, and a daresay nicer for the staff, and less wasteful.

Some people can really suck the joy out of things!

I stopped donating to the group presents after I heard how much was collected (I also didn't like the way it was split between the teacher and TAs). It was such a huge pot of money, it suddenly seemed a bit tasteless. I get that it saves the hassle of buying individually, but I'd rather my kids pick something small and take pride in giving it to their own teacher, than some voucher for an eye-watering amount being presented. It kind of misses the whole point.

I’ve organised it a few times - I’ve never known who has put in what and just do it from the whole class. I’ve learnt over the years not to over think it! If someone want to do their own thing that’s fine too.

Teachers aren't corporate employees.

Christ that’s a bit miserable. Why buy anyone a present then?! Why buy your mum a present, isn’t it just her job to be your mum?
Teachers care for your children 6 hours a day 5 days a week and you begrudge them a box of chocs

Mums don’t get paid. Surely teachers aren't comparable to the children’s mothers? That’s like saying that your road should do a whip around for the binmen?

We’ve had some really bad teachers. It is galling to be asked to effectively tip them. A nice homemade personal card should be sufficient to say thank you to teachers who go above and beyond.

It should be written into all school’s policies that personal gifts are not allowed. Contribute a box of pencils or books to the school library if you really feel the need to send something into school.

When my kids were little, we always did a teacher collection. It was not obligatory and the suggested donation was $5 or less (which is very reasonable). There were usually about 25 kids per class, so allowing for a couple of people who did their own thing or nothing, we’d usually have about $100. I actually had one teacher tell me ahead of time to just give her the money! I got a chuckle out of that and was happy to do so as it saved me the bother of trying to figure out what she might like. Also, teachers don’t tend to be rolling in dough, so she probably could use the extra.

I’ve always been happy to buy for my children’s teachers-I enjoy giving something towards them having something nice. If I didn’t want to, I wouldn’t do it.

Sometimes I’ve paid into a class collection, other times we’ve got them wine. Plenty of people over the years have bought gifts some years, or not at all-that’s their choice, but I wouldn’t want the option removed.