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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask who pays?

55 replies

cuppaanyon · 19/12/2023 09:14

Two sisters

S1 23, works in a apprenticeship role, lives at home contributes a small amount to bills

S2 21, at uni had a part time min wage job, gets a small amount from parents

S1 had some Xmas presents in a bag near her door. S2 opened her door (aggressively in s1 opinion) knocked the bag, broke a £10 cup.

S1 feels S2 should replace as it's her fault

S2 feels S1 shouldn't have left a bag near her door

Who pays?

OP posts:
Ellie1015 · 19/12/2023 10:04

Person who broke the mug says they will pay. S1 says "dont worry it was an accident"

If they really cant agree then they split it.

Beautiful3 · 19/12/2023 10:27

Usually then one who breaks it, pays. However leaving a mug behind a door is careless. They could do half each?

eerilyquietthismorning · 19/12/2023 10:42

£10 for a single mug!! You can buy a whole set for that (and give her one back out of the set)

jays · 19/12/2023 10:44

S2? as that’s who broke it and it was stored inside S1’s room.

Verv · 19/12/2023 10:45

s2

Mumof2teens79 · 19/12/2023 10:47

The back story is irrelevant it was an accident.

S2 offers, S1 declines and says please don't worry.

They are adults ffs not teenagers!

TeaKitten · 19/12/2023 10:48

Pay half each. Bag shouldn’t have been left that close to door, sister 2 broke it but it’s an accident. I can’t see why it’s relevant who pays/receives what from your parents though. Maybe just get them to decide?

eerilyquietthismorning · 19/12/2023 10:54

If I broke the mug I'd replace it but if my dsis broke the mug I'd take a loss and also replace it or leave it depending on its importance.
I wouldn't fall out with family at Christmas over a mug, that's madness.

aubergineman · 19/12/2023 12:28

I think it depends where the bag was.

In a bedroom that the sister was entering, door opener is at fault for not knocking.

In any other room or hallway, eg public household space, then bag leaver at fault.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 19/12/2023 13:35

ShortColdandGrey · 19/12/2023 09:18

S2 needs to pay tp replace the cup and say sorry. Why is S1 contributing to the household bills but S2 isn't from her job? Is S2 golden child?

Edited

She's a student. It does say that in the OP.

Tempnamechng · 19/12/2023 13:40

This is why I love siblings, the pettiness doesn't stop when they reach adulthood. They pay £5 each, s1 learns to put away their stuff safely and s2 learns to open doors nicely. Make them write a note to each other too saying sorry. 🤣🤣

autienotnaughty · 19/12/2023 15:34

Tempnamechng · 19/12/2023 13:40

This is why I love siblings, the pettiness doesn't stop when they reach adulthood. They pay £5 each, s1 learns to put away their stuff safely and s2 learns to open doors nicely. Make them write a note to each other too saying sorry. 🤣🤣

Absolutely this 😂

ZombieGirl86 · 19/12/2023 15:35

S2

Saza123 · 19/12/2023 21:46

People in the world are dying and you’re arguing about a bloody stupid cup, grow up!

LaurieStrode · 19/12/2023 21:47

Tohaveandtohold · 19/12/2023 09:21

It’s her bedroom door, her fault for opening the door aggressively rather than knocking first and allowing S1 to take the bag out of the way first. Their financial situation is not relevant as S2 should pay. If she has no money then she can go and ask their parents.

This. S2 needs to learn to knock and to be more cautious.

Noglitterallowed · 19/12/2023 21:56

Both sisters need to grow up!!

Jf20 · 19/12/2023 21:58

Are you really squabbling over a 10 pound mug? Grow up and split it.

Neilsfavouritechilli · 19/12/2023 22:01

Aye, I'm not usually one for doing the whole "have you nothing else to worry about" thing but I'm playing that card here. Pay the tenner and get over it.

ChaniceKobolowski · 19/12/2023 22:25

No one, a cup is a rubbish gift.

wronginalltherightways · 19/12/2023 22:30

S2 broke S1's item via carelessness. S2 needs to replace the item.

THEDEACON · 19/12/2023 22:49

S1 had bag in her own room containing mug S2 opens door to room and breaks said mug S2 pays simples!!

Mariposistaa · 19/12/2023 23:08

How about neither replaces and they can just be a mug down. I’m sure it wasn’t the main present. These two obviously don’t like each other much, with this pathetic squabbling. I dread ti think how they will be one day when they have ti organize a funeral.

mezlou84 · 19/12/2023 23:08

S2 she broke it. It was in S1 room why is S2 barging into her room? Anyone heard of knock and wait or knock and ask to come in? It honestly gives off the vibe that S2 is favoured over S1.
I don't get why she's not contributing and getting topped up by you either. When I was studying and working part time at Asda, part of that went towards food it wasn't alot but I was still earning and still had to contribute and didn't get a top up either. My mam had 3 jobs to keep us so nothing left over for anything like that. If my sister broke something by going into my room she would have to pay. If I went into her room and broke something I would have to pay. Whether we were on benefits or a millionaire the other person shouldn't have to pay to replace just because in your eyes she has more spare cash. She could have plans for the cash and not afford to pay for a new present, rather than other sister not be able to afford it because she doesn't earn alot. If you took everything into account S2 will probably have more ready cash than S1. OP you will probably bail S2 out by paying for it I can see it coming just to save arguments.
My husband's mother and father is like this and it starts with stupid little things like this but because they expect to be bailed out they never learn and it turns into bigger things as years go on.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 19/12/2023 23:16

I think S2 should pay because it’s S1’s bedroom that the cup was in - if it had been left by , say the front door, I’d say maybe split it. But S2 shouldn’t be swinging doors intonS1’s bedroom or going in without knocking. And if she knocked, S1 would have had the chance to warn her.

BlueGrey1 · 19/12/2023 23:22

It was an accident but I think S2 should offer to pay half, she didn’t know it was behind the door so she shouldn’t pay full price, if she pays half and the present is for parents / family, they can say it is from both of them

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