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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To keep DS5 off school for last week before xmas

35 replies

Anono34 · 17/12/2023 20:29

DS who is in reception started with chicken pox last weekend and has been very tired and poorly with it all week. He has been absolutely covered in spots particularly on his neck and face. They have all scabbed over now (as far as I can tell) but his face is covered in scabs and he’s been quite sensitive about how they look. I’m a bit worried that the other children in reception will comment on how they look and it will upset him. AIBU to keep him off school for the final week of school before Xmas? I don’t work so can do plenty with him at home but I’m just unsure whether so much time off school is a mistake.

OP posts:
pizzaHeart · 17/12/2023 20:37

Yes, YABU. I would keep him at home for cold, cough, tummy bug and even for tiredness in reception but not for this. It’s very ridiculous idea, sorry.
Send him in, the last week is relaxed and fun, he will be missing out so much. Just tell teacher that he might be tired still so you can pick him up earlier if it’s the case.
Have a bit of time for yourself before holidays, you must be very tired after the chicken pox week.

missnevermind · 17/12/2023 20:42

Just make sure he isn't missing out on a party day or something fun.
Ask the teacher.
With one of mine his older brothers were at senior school and he was at school nursery, the older boys broke up on the Friday but he didn't finish untill the Weds. I double checked he wasn't missing anything too fun and kept him off. Just sent a message to the school to say the rest of the family had broken up and it didn't seem fair for him to have to go in.

DDivaStar · 17/12/2023 20:45

I wouldn't just because there will be fun stuff in this last week.

mynameiscalypso · 17/12/2023 20:48

My DS is a little under the weather but is so excited about all the Christmas stuff they have this week - some kind of Santa's workshop tomorrow, Christmas lunch, Christmas parties etc. It's his first Christmas at school and he's exhausted but absolutely thrilled by it all.

Darkenergy · 17/12/2023 20:49

I wouldn't, it doesn't sit right with me as a precedent, you need to empower him to deal with stuff like this in life not hide away.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 17/12/2023 20:50

The last week is usually fun, especially in reception. I wouldn’t keep him off in your shoes.

DGPP · 17/12/2023 20:53

I would, but not because of the spots (don’t tell him you’re keeping him off because of that). If he’s been ill then he might feel tired out. It’s reception, he won’t miss much

BendingSpoons · 17/12/2023 20:55

I don't think it's a grest idea. It will mean he has had 4 weeks off and may make it hard to go back.

Mariposista · 17/12/2023 20:56

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mintmagnum3 · 17/12/2023 20:56

If he's well enough, he needs to go to school.

I hope this doesn't happen, but imagine that he's unwell again after Xmas or early next year and needs another week off.. that'll be 3 weeks he has off. It soon adds up and if I've learnt anything about primary school it's that they're I'll... all the time.

Also liek others have said, this week is the fun week! It should be a nice pick 'em up after him being poorly.

You'll also soon regrets having a fortnight off school before 2 weeks school holidays 😂🙈

Hope he's feeling lots better though!

vanillaredbushtea · 17/12/2023 21:01

No sorry. This sends a terrible message. When he gets acne he'll feel he has to hide. Empower him.

vanillaredbushtea · 17/12/2023 21:02

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Rude. OP may be unable to work

Mariposista · 17/12/2023 21:03

vanillaredbushtea · 17/12/2023 21:02

Rude. OP may be unable to work

Show quote history

Maybe. But I’d bet money that’s not the case.

vanillaredbushtea · 17/12/2023 21:06

Mariposista · 17/12/2023 21:03

Maybe. But I’d bet money that’s not the case.

Show quote history

Doesn't really matter. She might be a millionaire and not need to work.

It's completely irrelevant to the thread

Hiddenvoice · 17/12/2023 21:09

I’d be torn too! I’d be more worried about them not being 100% and catching another bug so that would make me want to keep them home. On the other hand, that would be a lot of time away from school and he may then become apprehensive about returning after the holidays.
You could keep him home tomorrow and then see about the rest of the week? The last week is usually very easy going and he might have his Christmas party this week.

VanityDiesHard · 17/12/2023 21:11

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What do you mean 'get back to work?' That isn't what the OP was asking about. I agree that she probably shouldn't keep her child off school if he is better from the chicken pox, but her being a SAHM is irrelevant.

Original poster
Anono34 · 17/12/2023 21:17

Hiddenvoice · 17/12/2023 21:09

I’d be torn too! I’d be more worried about them not being 100% and catching another bug so that would make me want to keep them home. On the other hand, that would be a lot of time away from school and he may then become apprehensive about returning after the holidays.
You could keep him home tomorrow and then see about the rest of the week? The last week is usually very easy going and he might have his Christmas party this week.

This is exactly it, I completely agree with PP who said it sends a bad message but then I think he’s probably not 100% yet (he was very poorly) and he isn’t going to miss much academically in the last week but it is a long time to have off school if he doesn’t go in and I keep going in circles 🙈 DH thinks keep him at home tomorrow and see how he is too

OP posts:
Belltentdreamer · 17/12/2023 21:22

Seems I’m in the minority here but… He’s 5 and has had chicken pox - keep the poor kid at home, rest him up. Have him go back happy, healthy and well rested in January

you also don’t want him knocking or itching off the scabs at school and risk infection/ scarring

Bloodyhellmate · 17/12/2023 21:22

I work with reception children and I would say if he has been very poorly recently and you still think he's not quite right let him have tmrw off and see how he is then.

pizzaHeart · 17/12/2023 21:35

Anono34 · 17/12/2023 21:17

This is exactly it, I completely agree with PP who said it sends a bad message but then I think he’s probably not 100% yet (he was very poorly) and he isn’t going to miss much academically in the last week but it is a long time to have off school if he doesn’t go in and I keep going in circles 🙈 DH thinks keep him at home tomorrow and see how he is too

Show quote history

You’ve said in your post that you are worried that other children will comment how the spots look and it will upset your son and that’s the reason for not sending him in . You didn’t tell that you were worried about another bug or your DS not being well enough.

Original poster
Anono34 · 17/12/2023 21:42

pizzaHeart · 17/12/2023 21:35

You’ve said in your post that you are worried that other children will comment how the spots look and it will upset your son and that’s the reason for not sending him in . You didn’t tell that you were worried about another bug or your DS not being well enough.

Show quote history

Sorry I probably wasn’t very clear in my initial post, I am worried about the spots, I’m also worried that he may still be run down (as I said he was really quite poorly), I’m also worried he will scratch or knock the scabs off, I can remind him not to scratch at home but a teacher obviously can’t when there are 30 children in the class. But the flip side of that is sending the wrong message re appearance (although I obviously haven’t commented on it and have reassured him when he has), the amount of time off school and the fact he will be missing the fun stuff with his friends.

OP posts:
Jijithecat · 17/12/2023 21:49

I wouldn't go in with the mindset of them not returning to school this week. I would take each day as it comes.
Chicken pox can be horrendous. My DC caught it, was off until everything had scabbed over and caught a sickness bug by the end of the first week back. Their immune system takes a battering with chicken pox so I can understand why you are wary.

booksandbrooks · 17/12/2023 23:04

I'd happily keep mine home, but we had chicken pox during covid online learning. Though thinking about that now, I wonder where we got it from.

That said, I'd take it day by day. Keep up the oat baths and poxiclin- one of mine loved this stuff and the other you couldn't get near an oat and the one who embraced the products and baths healed better.

Original poster
Anono34 · 18/12/2023 06:56

booksandbrooks · 17/12/2023 23:04

I'd happily keep mine home, but we had chicken pox during covid online learning. Though thinking about that now, I wonder where we got it from.

That said, I'd take it day by day. Keep up the oat baths and poxiclin- one of mine loved this stuff and the other you couldn't get near an oat and the one who embraced the products and baths healed better.

Thank you, this is good advice. Luckily he loves an oat bath so I’ll keep going with them!

OP posts:
Original poster
Anono34 · 18/12/2023 08:36

He’s actually woken up with a high temperature this morning so won’t be going to school anyway 😕

OP posts:
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