Toddler given marshmallows at nursery

[ginonthebus]

DS (18 months) has returned from nursery this evening with a cake he's 'made'. Was slightly concerned to see that it's decorated with a full size marshmallow on top. His nursery are usually brilliant with safety etc, but aren't these a major choking hazard? Can't tell if I'm being a bit PFB about this or if it's worth saying something to nursery. DH thinks we'll be 'those parents' if we do...

Oh for goodness sake! People have died choking on bread, that doesn't mean don't allow toddlers bread. You can literally choke on ANY fking thing!! We'd literally eat only air and water (even that can cause people to choke!) if we banned toddlers from eating every thing that could make them choke. Yes YABU and definitely PFB.

This is ignorant rubbish. Yes everything can be a risk, but some things are bigger risks- why not mitigate them where you can, especially if it's not something that takes any sacrifice? A child will be fine without large marshmallows until they're 5. Cutting up grapes is hardly an endurance sport, you can teach them to chew properly as well. I've worked in paeds for a fair few years and have seen several children who have had whole grapes lodged- I honestly don't get why any responsible parent would risk it?

Yes you can, but the risk of and the process of removing the lodged food to save someone's life or to try and avoid oxygen deprivation to the brain which causes major issues is very different for different foods. I'm not sure why some people can't grasp this, it's not complicated.

When I read the thread title I assumed that it was going to be about a vegetarian toddler being given a marshmallow. I didn’t know about the choking hazard and am glad I now know. I’d send an email with link to the government advice up thread as the nursery probably just don’t know (long time ago I was a nursery teacher and I’d have wanted to know). At least they should include a note with the cake warning re cutting it up maybe. It would be awful if another family who didn’t know about the risk had a child who died from choking on a ‘cake’ made at nursery , however small the risk.

One of my DC choked a lot on apple, meat etc when younger, later diagnosed with dyspraxia, I got so used to a swift sideways hand hit to their back but other people around generally looked shocked. Yes, lots of things are a choking hazard and kids need to learn to chew food but not sure I’d risk it for something that’s not really food at that age.

Do not feed your toddlers marshmallows!

They are impossible to dislodge, unlike other foods people are reeling off. So yes, of course you can choke on anything, but you can dislodge most foods, unlike marshmallows.

Tit

Finally a sensible answer!

But isn't the point that a DC could eat one without staff being aware during the activity and also that parents might not be aware of the safety issue and thing the cake is fine to give their DC as it was made at nursery. Definitely, politely let them know of the issue.

It's not about teaching them to bite and chew. They can still cause a safety issue.

It's not though is it? An early years setting sending food home endorses that the food is fine for the children. Lots of parents aren't aware of the risk of marshmallows, or as seen on these threads don't take it seriously. I'd suggest the nursery is ignorant also and that'd be concerning. The issue with marshmallows is that it isn't about learning to chew properly, they are difficult to chew in small mouths and if even its not swallowed whole but a chunk of it is it can expand when swallowed. Your job as a parent is to teach children to eat yes but it's also to protect them from known dangers. I don't mean remove anything dangerous as that's not feasible and they do need to learn how to navigate things; but a marshmallow is in no way shape or form essential or could use the mini ones.

A child should not be around any food which could choke them in a nursery setting. I say that as an ex nursery nurse. Please do mention it OP, just say 'the cake was lovely but i was concerned about the marshmallow being a chocking hazard?'. Then let them answer you, don't fill in the pause...you're paying for their services, woman up x

If I were a manager of a nursery/preschool, I most certainly wouldn’t be giving out large marshmallows. Not all parents are as cautious as others and I wouldn’t want to be responsible for an accident.

However, treat it as a life lesson for your own child about sitting while eating, biting, chewing etc. You won’t always be able to control what they choose to eat at preschool, parties, friends houses etc.

It’s true that kids can die choking on bread but it’s also true that foods range from very safe to an unacceptable choking risk for under 5s.

Marshmallows act differently from most other foods if lodged in the windpipe. Blows on the back and chest thrusts solves choking (usually) by dislodging the food, but marshmallows expand and cling to the windpipe so can’t be dislodged in the same way. They’re a specific type of risk that most other foods aren’t.

How would you know if your DC already ate one at nursery?

How is that sensible when the issue is not learning to bite and chew?

The 2 incidences of adults choking on marshmallows that I can find were both cases where the adults were taking part in a competition to see how many they could fit in their mouths in one go. One of the women suffered from ‘locked in’ syndrome following a stroke years earlier. There is also an incident of an 8 month old baby choking after being fed a big marshmallow.
So the first 2 we’re choking due to overfilling their mouths, whilst the 3rd was a case of parents giving their baby a totally unsuitable food.

And don't give toddlers whole grapes !!!!

People underestimate choking. They think it’s a few coughs and splutters, a pat on the back, a sip of water and it’s all over but it’s really not. It’s totally silent.

I choked on a piece of chicken in a restaurant about 4 years ago. My husband was sitting opposite me but was completely engrossed in his meal so I couldn’t get his attention. I had tried a drink of water which came straight back down my nose. I had to bang, hard, on the table, as I stood up which got everyone’s attention. DH is first aid trained, so he started back slaps, but it didn’t move, the waiter (we were on holiday in Spain) came running saying “the stomach, the stomach”. Abdominal thrusts got it up, thankfully, and I had to be checked over by a doctor.

I have never been so scared in all my life. I thought I was going to die. It’s not about teaching your children to eat something safely, we all try to do that. If something is a choking hazard, it’s a choking hazard so it’s negligent to give it, especially by a nursery.

I’m assuming he was supervised when he made the cake? So surely it’s a bit of a none event, apart from you getting a lovely cake made by your ds. If you had made it at home with your son next to you, it’s the same kind of scenario. Supervised both times.

I'd regard it in the same way as a toddler accessing balloons in a nursery. Some people will say my children always played with balloons and there was no issue whilst I'm haunted by memories of a neighbor's child who couldn't be saved after swallowing a balloon particle at a party.
We minimize risks in any way we can and id be gently pointing this out to the nursery.

Older people choke on marshmallows when they do the "how many can you cram in your mouth challenge." Maybe even if they've toasted one, stick it in their mouth while and inhaled at shock when it burns them, but not when taking small bites of one melted on a cake.

Much like grapes, you prep them and teach them rather than avoid them.

The choking risk will be why they sent the cake home. I don't let DS eat anything he's made at nursery as children will be coughing, sneezing, touching the mixture and it's too many germs.
But as they've sent it home you choose. Cut it up or bin it.

@ginonthebus - ignore the ignorant comments. YANBU or PFB at all. Nursery should not be using marshmallow's!

Unfortunately this is just the beginning of people who you think are well informed about children's health and safety giving your child choking hazards. Drives me nuts. I wouldn't complain, just wouldn't allow DC to eat it whole.

What’s your problem?

Last time I checked this is a PARENTING site where people come for advice and support. Why are you showing unnecessary aggression when the OP has actually come on here to ask whether she’s being U in saying something to the nursery. As opposed to going there all guns blazing.

Some people are so rude and miserable on here for no actual reason. OP it is a choking hazard and I’d say something to the nursery the next time that I was there