To ask how much you spend on adult relatives at Christmas

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I’ve done my parents a little stocking each, with several low-value items (a nice book, some warm socks, sweets they like). I have really struggled for ideas this year but don’t want this to look like a sad effort. Is it enough? I suppose I could also maybe put in a voucher for their favourite restaurant for them to enjoy together, or buy DM a voucher for the local spa to have a nice massage. They deserve the world and I can’t think of a main present idea! Both have said they think Christmas is over commercialised and would prefer to just spend time together which we are going to do.

I have no idea what’s normal these days with cost of living and what most other people do. We earn average incomes definitely not minted but not struggling either.

We don’t do presents for ourselves, parents, siblings etc. The DC are adults and live in other cities so we used to do presents only in the years that we saw them at Christmas, but when we finally suggested a no presents rule they were very happy as no-one wants more stuff. We spend our Christmas budget on fabulous wine and food that we all enjoy together.

It sounds like they want to spend time together - so do that! Plan a family day out over Xmas that's your treat

I don't buy for many adults. Myself & my 4 brothers chip in on an annual membership for a local house & gardens amenity for my parents. They love the place & it has beautiful walks & a cafe so it's what they want every year & they use it a lot. It costs us each approx €30. I have over the years also got my parents a Christmas decoration with all the grandchildren's names on. This year there was a new grandchild so I've got them a new dec.
My brother in law & his partner get a €25 Just Eat voucher & a bottle of wine & my mother in law I spent €30 on a handbag in a sale that I know she'll love.

That's it's. Every other present is either for the children I mind, friends children & my own children.

Please restudy "comprehension skills"

Where did I say they give me £50 back 🤣

I said I spent lots of money on them throughout the year.

This being buying them a house, car, holidays etc. The £50 is a mere token

So I spend around £20 on my aunt. My adult cousin and husband don’t have kids and spend a lot on mine so I usually spend about £40-50 on a joint gift for them. Usually for my my around £30 but I’ve had some inheritance this year so I’ve spent extra as she deserves more than I can usually afford. My sister and her husband are usually around £25 each but again this year I’ve maybe increased that with the inheritance. The extras this year are a one off though. My other adult cousins I don’t by for and for one I just buy their kids. But that’s the sum total of who I buy for on top of my own children. I single. Oh I do usually by the ex something from the kids too but £15 this year.

X

We do Secret Santa with DH family, his parents, 2 Dsis and BIL, this year we have also added in adult kids as niece and 2 nephews are now over 18 and spend £50 but provide a wishlist, still buy for younger kids
we have also introduced secret Santa using the same rules with my family as we also buy for our adult cousins and their DHs that live near as well as DB and partner, this has massively cut down our Xmas spending and also know the gifts are more what the person wants due to the wishlist element

The grandparents then get chocolates or shortbread and a calendar of our young DC from their grandkids

£100 per person on siblings and parents.

I think it depends. On parents and grandparents, anything from £50 to £150, depending on what we want to get them. I dont really know what my dh has spent on his dad, probably close to or over the £200 mark, but dfil helps us an awful lot. I don't set a spending amount as such, just buy what I think they would like within reason. To me it's about buying them a nice treat, rather than putting a price on it and having £x to spend on each person. They are very generous with us so we like them to have something nice.

If there's something I know they will like then I may spend more such as a nice air fryer one year or jewellery or wireless ear buds but otherwise this year we plan a sort of food hamper with things like fruit, nuts, some nice M&S food and snacks as they say they don't want loads of sweet things and they'll get plenty from other people.

We spend more on the children (£150-200 each) and how much we spend on one another also varies depending on whether there is anything we actually want. I spend around £100 on my siblings. For around 5 aunts / uncles and cousins I spend around £20 each on some nice chocolates or biscuits, sometimes something like handwash and hand cream.

I don't think there is a right or wrong. Spend what yo can afford to spend and what you want to spend.

Around £25-£40 on parents, siblings.
£10 each on older more distant relatives.

£40-£50 for DH family (3 people) and we do a secret Santa for mine with a value of £40.

We've stopped doing presents with friends and instead go out for a lovely meal together.

I'd second Freddie's Flowers if you want to go down a flower subscription route. Much bigger, better quality and all-round more lovely than Bloom and Wild, but the box doesn't fit through the letterbox.

I do monthly flowers for my mum, so that does work out at a few hundred over the year, but it's her birthday, Christmas and mother's day present from me and she absolutely loves it.

For Dad this year, I'm going with another subscription, to Pie Club! 6 months of handmade pies delivered to the door, which is £200.

Between my two siblings and their partners, we do a £20 budget Secret Santa.

I spend somewhere between £100- £400 on my partner, depending on what he'd like. His birthday is Christmas eve, so it's a combined present. This year, it's around £200.

Me and my sister usually go in on gifts together
but we always find it so hard to get them anything

this year we are gifting my mum a day out in London with afternoon tea at the ritz
that will be about
we usually say £150 on each parent between us

we don't buy for each other or each others husbands

£50 on each parent £15-20 on a little treat for a friend or two. £20 on niece and nephews. Roughly. We don't buy for adult siblings but we still do birthdays for them throughout the year 😃