Compared to other threads, this is all very first-world problems but I feel like I've lost all perspective on this so please let me know if IABU.
I found out a few days ago that my favourite band is playing a one-off gig in London this month - the day after my birthday. They were on hiatus for many years, but they played a small comeback gig in Scotland (where I live) earlier this year, and which my DP and I attended and loved. For info, I've been to almost every gig they've ever played in my city, always with DP, and I've loved them for decades.
So when I learned they were playing the day after my birthday, I thought it was a total no-brainer as a birthday present. Nothing else would have lived up to it. Especially as we actually travelled several years ago to Ireland for my birthday, where and when the band played a gig. I thought we could make a mini-break out of it in London, like we'd done in Ireland. Easy.
But my DP is Not Keen at all. He says there's no point, that we've already seen the band this year. They're releasing a new album soon, so in all likelihood will be touring next year with a good chance of being in our city again. He says there'll be too much rushing around for trains, that the venue is in an awkward place to get out of time-wise, if the gig ends at 11pm and our train is at 11.45pm. It'll be expensive if we also stay overnight, there'll be too much walking around in the cold to kill time, and taking time off work might be an issue. Frankly, he's been a workaholic all year - not really his fault, he's been placed on a big project at work - but we haven't been on holiday, and did nothing for a milestone anniversary.
I thought this plan could rectify all of these things by giving us a mini-holiday. I've never seen London at Christmas. So I said, well, if we're staying overnight, we'll do something special the next day that you want to do. Every time we've gone down to London before, because it's such a trek, we usually see two shows/attractions, one for each of us. So he took a look online but said nothing appeals. I just don't think he enjoys London. He says he only went to the Ireland gig because he'd never been to Ireland before. He said he'd have been more likely to go to this gig if the band had announced a one-off gig in Berlin or somewhere we've never been.
By now, I'm very exasperated. This is my favourite band, this is my ideal present, nothing else would compare frankly. So I say fine, I'll go down by myself. This alarms DP. He says that if I went down on my own for my birthday, then he would feel incredibly guilty and he should be there with me to celebrate. I shrug and tell him that sounds more like his problem. He's now very sad and having a bit of an existential crisis over it, says it's all he's been thinking about. I don't think he'd forgive himself if I went down alone, but also... I just want to see the band?? And if we both went down, I have a feeling he'd be so stressed about travel that he wouldn't make it the most enjoyable experience.
So now we're at a sort of stalemate. DP and I very rarely disagree on things and usually manage to hash something out. I don't know if I'm doing the equivalent of screaming I WANT A PONY and should get over myself, especially as DP only had a modest cinema/restaurant birthday this year, or if I should just LTB, etc.
Maybe the tickets will sell out first and we won't have to make a decision??