Rude people are the Theatre

[MadeleineMummy]

I hardly ever go out but a friend and I decided to go to the West End to see a sold out version of Macbeth. There was an affluent couple behind us who just talked loudly and heavy petted all through the first half while kicking our seats. It was a small theatre and it was really distracting. I kept on looking back at them but they did not seem to notice. I finally spoke to them and told them I could not hear the actors. The woman then haughtily said with a smile, “Well I won’t speak louder than the actors then”. Then proceeded to talk louder. It was not just them, it seemed as if there was a buzz of talking around the whole theatre.

During the interval, I spoke to an usher and she said she would have a word and she did speak to them twice but it did nothing to dissuade them for speaking. Is it just me or have people lost all sense of decorum and decency? The play was a hot ticket with famous names and I would assume that people who came out would have some appreciation for the theatre and be lovers of Shakespeare but it seems not to be the case. This is the second time this year that I have been to a show and people have talked all the way through.

I really hate going out because most venues seem to have ignorant rude people. I am inclined to stay in more because I know that I will have my night spoiled by horrible people.

Is there anything I can do to step people from behaving so horribly?

It’s grim isn’t it? I’ve encountered more of it in recent years. Nothing as obnoxious as that though - more a lack of awareness.

I had to ask a woman in her 60s (sat behind me) to stop singing along with Les Mis. She was out of tune, out of time and deafening me. I didn't pay to listen to her shite singing. She was also very cross and tutted at me for the rest of the performance. Her husband wasn't impressed I'd asked her to stop either.

Utter wankers.

I'm sorry, I couldn't get over 'affluent couple'?? 😳🤣

But YANBU at all. I go to West End productions a lot and I've noticed a real decline in manners over the last few years.

The last show I went to, an 'influencer' (apparently) spent most of her time twisting round in her seat and taking selfies with the stage in the background!

I was once right next to someone at the ballet who hummed and tapped along to the music. It was a bit annoying. Part of me thought though that there are other theatre cultures and ways of enjoying shows which are more interactive, and that helped me find him less annoying. Like i went to Beijing opera in China, and people were chatting and cracking sunflower seeds throughout.

Having said that heavy petting sounds awful- and although audiences were more interactive in Shakespeare's time, they engaged fully with the show, just in a loud way. Sounds like this couple didn't even watch it - what a waste for them and horrible for those around them. You have my sympathies.

I'm sure people behave poorly in the theatre irrespective of being affluent or in their 60s.

I hate this behaviour, I've noticed it at music gigs too.

Oh this would drive me potty. What's the point in buying a ticket to the theatre to have a chat with someone? Just go to a fucking pub.

How was Macbeth though? I'm going on Saturday and really excited

This sort of behaviour is really frustrating and very common. I sympathise, OP.

Write to the thwarted and ask what their policy is on annoying behaviour?

I haven’t come across this - but sometimes in the pictures when it’s half empty you get an really tall person plonked in front of you so you can’t see - just rude

People chomping their way through loud snacks / crisps at WE shows / plays.
WTF is that all about? I think people forget they’re not in their front room. It’s bloody awful when you’ve paid a lot of money to go and see something and are surrounded by arseholes.

People like this should be shot.

I would pay more for a silent performance where the extra fee went to big old bouncers who would throw people out for any minor infraction. Everyone else could go to a normal show and there should be an idiot specific performance for people who want to chat.

Im normally very relaxed but not about this.

I’m less bothered by rude people themselves than the fact there is no sanction. As a society we seem to have caved to self-centred boorish behaviour.

There would be no problem here if the obnoxious couple got booted out when they ignored the usher. Or if speaking to them once had got them to behave. The problem is they get away with it, are affirmed in it and more people join in as they see that actually there are no rules.

I don’t find it consoling to think noise and disruption is ok in other cultures. This was something I liked about this culture and something I continue to like in certain others too.

it was very good despite the distractions. The setting was intimate and really captures the atmosphere of the language.

I am hoping that your description of heavy petting doesn’t match my understanding of it.

Of course YANBU.

I remember a few months ago, at the cinema, there were a group of women who were scrolling on their phones for the majority of the film and chatting amongst themselves. One woman in the group kept clearing her throat really dramatically and doing that sound just before you spit out phlegm. It was gross 🤢

I don’t know why these types of people spend money to go and watch shows and films if they’re not even going to concentrate and be respectful of others.

If you're up for starting a campaign on this, I will gladly join.

Maybe not the shooting (except as a last resort). But all the rest of it.

There was an affluent couple behind us who just talked loudly and heavy petted all through the first half while kicking our seats.

Heavy petting? As in committing sex acts?

Did you tell the usher that?

Email a complaint in op. Have been refunded cinema tickets twice in recent years after complaints.. Including a family of 2 adults and 3 dc including a new baby.. The dm stood 2 rows down in front of us shushing her dc during a pg film. She actually made up a bottle and fed it also. Was beyond the ticket stuff who said the usher should have refused entry...

I went to Stratford recently, and a boy who was (imho) too young to be there spent the WHOLE time asking his mum what was going on. She answered every question and follow up question painstakingly. Which was lovely, but completely the wrong place. It was so frustrating

Would it have been any different if these people had been described as council estate types?
🤣🤣

@Nosingreindeer I'm with you. No snacks for sale. No one who can't behave. Yes I'm not being inclusive.....but it's one performance a week. Happy that they also have other styles of performance too.
I went to Jesus Christ Superstar recently and a couple behind me came in late, half cut with 2 drinks each.....maybe if they hadn't been to the bar they would have been on time. They had noisy pringles. Got drunker and kept talking. I gave them my best Paddington hard stare.
Then he came back from the interval with more drink. There was an ominous crash at one point.....on the one hand I wanted it to be his drink all down him, on the other hand I didn't want the cleaners to have to deal with it.....I never did find out.

No, that's my whole point! 🤣🤣

Oh, I hate this!

I think some people just lack all manners and common decency, to be honest and really don't care that they're ruining it for other people. They have the mentality that they've paid for their tickets so they can enjoy the show/film/concert as they wish.

I went to see Mariah Carey a few years ago. Lifelong fan of hers and it was the first time she'd toured the UK in well over a decade. So it was my first (and to my knowledge at the time) and last opportunity to see her live. I was so looking forward to it. Paid extra for the best seats that were available.

As soon as I got seated, I noticed a woman stumbling in, drunk off her face, and falling to her chair right behind me. Not great start, and yes, I know it's a concert-but it wasn't even half 7 at this point-and throughout the concert, all I could hear was her screeching the songs like a demented banshee in my ear and if I looked at her, she'd just get uppity that I was "being miserable."

I'm not saying don't drink and have a dance, and a bit of a sing-along, but don't screech in someone's ear and ruin the show for other people. Have a good time, but make sure it's in your bubble, not crossing into other people's.

And I won't take my mum to see any musicals because I know she will start singing along and clapping and won't see anything wrong with it. She's the type that would think someone was miserable and spoiling her good time if they complain! So I avoid that like the plague 😂

My dgd takes dancing lessons and the dancing school like to put on a show once or twice a year.
Several men. dads I think,start shouting their daughters name loudly.
One was quite annoyed when his child wouldn't acknowledge his shouting.' ,Don't look at me then you little shit,.'
Disgusting and embarrassing for the kids in question.

@Scarletttulips how is it rude to be tall? If the place is half empty just ask if you can move! Wearing a big hat is rude, being tall is not.