Rude people are the Theatre

[MadeleineMummy]

I hardly ever go out but a friend and I decided to go to the West End to see a sold out version of Macbeth. There was an affluent couple behind us who just talked loudly and heavy petted all through the first half while kicking our seats. It was a small theatre and it was really distracting. I kept on looking back at them but they did not seem to notice. I finally spoke to them and told them I could not hear the actors. The woman then haughtily said with a smile, “Well I won’t speak louder than the actors then”. Then proceeded to talk louder. It was not just them, it seemed as if there was a buzz of talking around the whole theatre.

During the interval, I spoke to an usher and she said she would have a word and she did speak to them twice but it did nothing to dissuade them for speaking. Is it just me or have people lost all sense of decorum and decency? The play was a hot ticket with famous names and I would assume that people who came out would have some appreciation for the theatre and be lovers of Shakespeare but it seems not to be the case. This is the second time this year that I have been to a show and people have talked all the way through.

I really hate going out because most venues seem to have ignorant rude people. I am inclined to stay in more because I know that I will have my night spoiled by horrible people.

Is there anything I can do to step people from behaving so horribly?

It does put me off going places. I hate when people in front are on their phones as it’s so distracting as the light of the screen draws your attention. It seems a pretty common occurrence in cinemas

Went to see Tina Turner show in the West End a couple of months back and a drunk bloke in front kept talking loudly, drinking from a bottle in a bag, then fell asleep and started snoring, then woke up and started being derogatory about the show. When their neighbours asked them for the 3rd or 4th time to be quiet the bloke lashed out physically and had to be dragged out by security and then his wife started hitting the people who had asked them to be quiet too.

It was appalling.

My personal bugbear is people messing with their phones in the cinema/theatre. I took my kids to the cinema recently and the woman in front just would not stop messing with her phone. If she had been closer I’d have asked her to put it away. Why do people do this? It’s so distracting. I’m with you op. I hate rude people and it would upset me if the theatre was ruined by bad manners.

Who are these people though? I've never met or even heard of anyone who thinks any of this is acceptable behaviour, who are these crazy people paying a fortune to go to shows they're clearly not interested in so they can ruin them for everyone else? And not just the occasional oddball but enough of them to fill up many forums with complaints about them? Unless it's always the same small group of people and it's their very weird hobby...?!

Oh yes! And when I was a child I remember the sweets were sold in 'theatre boxes' and included things like fruit gums and chocolates.

I'm a regular music gig goer and behaviour from other punters has become so bad lately I'm finding I don't enjoy it anymore. I usually get standing tickets to heavy metal gigs, and people are rude, walk through you, talk through sets, spend most of the gig on their phone. I'm 5'4, so most people are taller than me at gigs, the vast majority of men are well over 6 ft, so I regularly get trodden on, elbowed in the head, or the tits, pushed out of the way at the bar, or have drinks spilled on me because people are drunk. I make a point of staying as far out of the way as possible and it still happens. The worst are the guys who come and stand directly in front of you so you cant see a thing, and they don't give a shit even if you ask them to let you see. I spend ages looking for a good vantage spot before the gig starts are guaranteed 9/10 I'll have a taller man in front of me by the time the headliner starts.

This behaviour has become much worse in recent years, especially after Covid. I've no idea why.

Don't be ridiculous! You sit in your allocated seat (yes, even tall people) and then once you realise certain seats aren't going to be used, if you're not happy, YOU move.

The onus is not on tall people to preempt, before the film has started, who may or may not arrive to sit in certain seats. Otherwise they may end up constantly moving as people arrive to sit in their allocated seats.

‘Don't be ridiculous! You sit in your allocated seat (yes, even tall people) and then once you realise certain seats aren't going to be used, if you're not happy, YOU move’

Do calm down dear. Fortunately there are plenty of tall people ( like DH and I) who are considerate enough to think of other people. Increasingly rare in this wonderful society we live in. Next thing you’ll be admitting you take McDonalds to the cinema as well 😉

Yanbu. I went to see a Shakespeare play 6 yrs ago and I was surrounded by people scrolling through their phones and rustling sweet packets. They were oblivious to the effect it had on other audience members and actors.

Well that is interesting…

OP?

Conversely we went to a children’s theatre show recently, aimed at 0-8 year olds, and there was no talking through it or people getting out of seats or rustling crisp packets.

Maybe the people behind you had expensive watches, but money can’t buy you class.

Went to theatre and person behind was banging seat, they did apologise when I looked round, but still carried on.

Also the rustling of bloody sweet papers, can anyone not go anywhere for a few hours without eating.

Very rarely go to the cinema, if I do then I wait until the film has been out for ages, so there's not many people in there.

It's probably the minority rather than the majority still annoying though.

I have to admit, I am the Arsehole. The couple were annoying me so I left for a breather while DT was on. Sacrilege, I know but I could not enjoy the play with idiots.

I possibly annoyed people as well with mt tutting and turning around.

I had to tell a couple to stfu at the cinema last night, sitting there talking like they were jn their living room.

They did shut up thankfully. Last time I had to do that they called me an ugly fat cow as everyone else clapped me!

Anyway, cinema is bad enough, but at the theatre is a whole new level. I don't understand why people just don't go to the pub if they want to talk.

Oh OP. Sacrilege!

I went to see Sarah Millican a few weeks ago, Guy in front was loud, waving his arms to try and get her attention (not a hope from where we were sat) and eventually gave up to have a long conversation and a full on snog fest with the woman he was with.
I’m partially deaf and so that night was wearing a hearing loop which happily filtered him out, though his waving arms were irritating, but I thought my friend was going to kill him. She’s a high school teacher as well so I thought she showed great restraint.

What?? Surely people sit in the seat they have purchased the ticket for ? As a short-arse I would try to move if possible if I couldn't see round the person in front,
but I wouldn't expect them to move to a different seat just because I happen to be short .

Cinema and theatres are full of anti social people for who the performances are of secondary experience to it being about them and they will do what they want to do. People cannot stop drinking, eating or talking. Anti social behaviour that impacts other's experience should be stamped on by the establishment, not other customers. But someone upthread works as an usher and ushers are not allowed to eject people. Their employers, the big theatre chains, want people to pay extortionate money for alcohol, so they don't care that the drinkers annoy others. Going to the theatre is an expensive treat, but one that is hit and miss in terms of enjoyment.

Hell is other people.

I had to tell a teenager off for eating crisps when I last went. She put them away pretty sharpish, my DD said I’d scarred the kid for life!

I went to our tiny little local cinema by myself last week to see 'Napoleon'. It was a full house and the cinema has 47 seats. The other 46 people there couldn't shut the fuck up for longer than two minutes and had to rustle food packets/wrappers constantly as though they'd starve to death if prevented from eating for the duration of the film. It was infuriating. The couple behind me were especially irritating, chatting away as though they were sitting in their own house. Fuckwits who can't be quiet in a cinema or theatre should be blacklisted and banned!

Is this the production of Macbeth where the audience all wear headphones to experience 3D sound?

I hear you OP. Times have changed, it’s so sad. I remember as a child having to be so quiet along with everyone else, you could hear a pin drop. It allowed you to be transported along with everyone else in the auditorium to a magical world of make believe.
Unfortunately, nowadays it’s all about the people sitting around you.
Most people don’t eat with their mouths closed these days either. Such a shame and completely revolting.

It's isn't snobbery, it is how invested people are in the production they are seeing.

im not surprised it was affluent people in cheaper seats not paying attention. They have made no investment in seeing the production is my point.

Of course not all people who buy cheaper seats talk in thestres, but some will as they have sometimes decided on a whim to watch it or judt gone to tick off another show.

I've never come across the opposite as not many would search out the best seats and then talk.

Boxes are to be avoided too in a lot of venues, larger companies often have their own boxes to entertain clients etc it's common for those inside them to be disengaged.

Need more of this!

This is how loud they were.