Employee feels micromanaged if I give her tasks with deadlines

[calmama]

I manage a person who is generally difficult. She objects to… well everything and undermines me at every chance she gets.

When she first started working for me we sat down together and established a work plan to get our job done and keep us on track to meet deadlines. We agreed I would assign daily tasks and we would meet weekly to discuss progress on projects along with anything new we had to take on, along with any business changes, leave, etc.

Weeks down the line she exploded at me for colour coding priorities, saying the urgent (red) tasks were ‘very unfriendly and freaking her out’. I took the red out.

A few weeks later she exploded at me for ‘micromanaging and bullying her’ by sending her daily priorities, despite this being agreed upon from the very start. I asked for an alternative way of progressing projects. She had none.

Today she exploded at me for setting deadlines because they ‘stress her out’. Again, I asked her for an alternative way of doing things and she had none.

I’m at a loss. She’s doing honestly the bare minimum and can’t seem to cope. I’m having to pick up her slack because otherwise my team looks bad, yet I’m still copping the brunt of her rage and there’s no end in sight.

AIBU to throw my hands in the air and take a long vacation?

The employee has left her manager no choice but to do this (call it micro-managing if you want). Those of you criticising the manager are as bad as the employee.
and those of you criticising…. What do you propose instead?
the employee needs a PIP
OP - im sorry this is happening. Lazy direct reports are such an energy drain.

Sign me up also! If expecting someone to do in a week, what would take an intelligent person a day to accomplish is micromanaging, please, feel free to micromanage me for money! 💲💲

RanpantIvy unlike you have a life outside of mums net so I’m sure this makes the highlight of your day and your very invested clearly . See you off out to a birthday party in London enjoy mumsnet

I agree with oth @midtownmum too. She’s clearly not capable of this role.

op, you haven’t responded to any mention of HR involvement (unless I missed it) - perhaps you’re embarrassed that you haven’t been able to sort this out alone? If that’s the case you are definitely making yourself look like a less competent manager in the long run.

she sounds incompetent and she is getting away with it by making excuses, disrespecting you and then being aggressive. You are not being unreasonable as she is not the competent professional many on this thread seem to be assuming she is. Speak to HR , document everything; set her clear goals and if she fails to meet them ask her what is stopping her, remove all blockers and excuses, if she doesn't improve put her on a PIP and mange her out. It's hard work but not as hard as working with this idiot and picking up the slack.

Talk to HR, follow the disciplinary procedures, give her a warning and let her go if she doesn’t improve

If she is struggling to make phone calls and email suppliers by deadlines then she is in the wrong job.

Go to HR as you have evidence where she claimed she emailed but hadn’t.

Ofcourse she doesnt trust her! The employee doesnt do as asked; she lies about doing it; she makes up stupid implausible excuses; she agrees to things then buffs when they happen!! 🙄 This employee should be on competence/performance procedures!!

My husband behaves like this with stuff at home. He has severe ADHD so actually can’t do a lot of stuff so it’s his brain trying to get him out if doing stuff or buy himself time. His outbursts stem from an emotionally abusive childhood where his mother ruled the roost by exploding to cover up her terrible parenting.

im guessing your direct report also has some kind of issues like BPD or a difficult childhood whereby she has none of the tools needed for adult life. If you only know anger and chaos as the tools to solve a problem in childhood, you arrive in adulthood with only those tools in your toolbox.

she needs to be in a PiP asap so you can manage her out

OP is at risk of clouding legitimate management action to resolve the situation by providing grounds for grievance. You cannot resolve capability or misconduct issues by micromanaging people into submission. The employee is an adult in a contractual relationship. With HR support, expectations need to be clearly reiterated, consequences of not meeting them explained, and employee given reasonable support and usual professonial courtesies. If they can't meet the standard on this basis, the defined consequences follow. There is no place here for micromanaging.

What a way to say nothing in lots of words! Micromanaging is not illegal! It’s not grounds for a grievance! Any grievance investigation would find the direct report to have a bad attitude and to be failing to do basic tasks.
micromanaging is not a long-term management solution but it is certainly necessary in short term situations to understand what’s going on before raising a pip.
theres an awful lot of people commenting here who have clearly zero management experience.

let me guess @calmama is she early 20s?

😆

What a way of saying nothing with one emoji because you don’t know what you’re talking about!
the employee is accusing her boss of micro management as another deflection tactic from the real issue (her inability to do the job). The manager might be using some aspects of micro management to get to the root of the problem as she has no other option. Others would argue this isn’t micromanagement at all.
micro management is not just about control, and it’s not always negative.

😂

She obviously cannot do the job and need to leave or be fired for incompetence.

Fire her. You're not a bully, you're not micromanaging, you're just doing your job but she isn't.
Maybe she does not like your management style but I assume everyone else on team is OK with it?

I gather from your comments you work in events so can understand why tasks come up daily and she wouldn’t know them unless you told her.
I'm sorry I don’t have a solution for you, she sounds useless at her job. I just want to have your back, some roles do have this level of task management involved, and it’s not always appropriate for every team member to be copied into the client emails (it makes your company look unprofessional to have every Tom, Dick and Harry ccd in - the client is expecting to liaise with only one or two people and for you to delegate tasks internally.
ugh I hope she either improves or you can get rid of her. YANBU

My sister's friend is exactly like this. Literally a handful of similar tasks. Can't do them for some reason. Can't get started. Then snapped at boss when boss started piling the pressure on.

This friend has bipolar disorder though, which is part of it.

OP, I feel for you. I’ve been in a similar situation. Are you getting support from above? Because you do need to be moving to a PIP and getting to the bottom of this. I fear a health diagnosis plays into this here and there’s a thin line between adjusting for that and simply her incapability. A PIP would at least identify the issues formally, show you are reasonably addressing them, and then move to a more formal route.

I have to be honest, as an employer I'm shocked that you don't know how to handle this situation. If it is your job to manage an employee, you should know the company processes & procedures in place for these kinds of things. So it sounds to me like yourself & the employee are not properly trained or experienced within either of your positions. This is a recipe for disaster & not a good working environment. A professional in your position wouldn't be complaining about an employee on net mums nit knowing how to handle this simple situation. You would revisit your company procedures or consult with your HR/Upper management so you know how youre supposed to handle this.

The way you've explained her reactions as 'exploding', but giving no actual real context of what she actually physically or verbally said or did, also is a huge red flag. Employees shouldnt make statements like this either about or to their employee. Exploded to you can mean something completely different to somebody else. You should describe the actual physical or verbal actions that are inappropriate or not. She shouted or she was physically or verbally abusive, or simply she responded to your email saying she wasn't happy & why but used a few too many exclamation marks for your liking..

So its hard to answer your question without actually knowing how she has really handled these interactions..

When you say she 'exploded' at you several times, can you clarify exactly what she did/what you mean by this?

Exploded, to me, sounds like she shouted/slammed/acted physically or verbally aggressively... If that's true that is not allowed in a professional environment, so the first time incur a serious verbal warning, along with revisiting her agreed duties & confirthat was what was agreed & that is her job. Second time would be a written warning, 3rd time dismissal, because shouting & agressive behaviour just isn't acceptable in the workplace.

If she did not verbally or physically show aggression, but she has stated that she isnt able to work as agreed, then you need to arrange a private 121 meeting with her, as her employer, bring along the meeting minutes or written agreement or job description that shows where you both agreed to these terms of workings and kindly but firmly remind her that it was agreed upon. Then discuss this together until the agreement is either confirmed, or if she is nit willing to do her agreed job then she is breaking the contract by not doing her job.

However as I previously stated, it's pretty clear that you nor her are properly trained or experienced enough to handle these basic situations/your jobs, so it's no wander that she is frustrated.

Theres nothing worse than having an incompetent manager or being put in a role that you aren't ready for or suited to.

I have to be honest, as an employer I'm shocked that you don't know how to handle this situation.

You shouldn't be. Bad managers are ten a penny. It's almost inevitable when one gets promoted to manager because they're good at doing something else, and usually it means being taken away from the actually good on-the-ground work they were doing. Like a bookbinder who binds books so well, he gets promoted to head of the bookbinding department...but now he's doing the completely different job of managing bookbinders, and he's not binding books himself, or at least he's doing it a lot less, even though he's supposedly the best at it.

I can see how it happens but it is a bit of a faulty system. There are also too many pointless management positions filled by people who have to create work to justify their existence.

Not saying OP is one of these people, but pisspoor management is common for a reason. It's a pretty specific skill and I don't think many people are great at it.

A colleague of mine once had to manage an individual who sounds very similar to your member of staff. This person had a track record of being moved sideways from job to job within the organisation, being ineffective in every role they were placed in then playing the harassment/bullying card and going sick with work-related stress. Every time reasonable objectives were not met was explained by medical issues that required adjustment to frequent changes of medication. My colleague had the option of picking up the tasks assigned to this individual or seeing them not done/done to an unacceptable standard, so I do understand your pain!

You said that you agreed that you would assign daily tasks - was that your solution, or hers? Have you tried defining what needs to happen and by when, then getting her to come up with the how to go about it and agreeing an action plan - including milestones/checkpoints? What are the consequences if she misses her objectives and does she understand them? Is she your only member of staff - and if so, are you having regular 1-2-1 meetings with all of your team and how do those go? Have you discussed the matter with your manager, and what sort of support are you getting? If she's really not meeting her objectives (and if she's done nothing, what is she doing all day?) then she needs to be on some sort of performance improvement plan and to understand the consequences if she doesn't meet the requirements. Document everything you agree with her.

1. What is her job? Is what you are asking her to do reasonable/within the job description?
2. Micromanaging is not always acceptable, can be oppressive and it is unpleasant to have nothing but dashboards in your working day. They are irritating and often unnecessary. If anything, it’s a sign that people, including the OP, cannot deal with simple tasks without breaking it down into such tiny fragments and recording it (during which you could have done the task) that you might find yourself being rated red for forgetting to breathe. Get a life. Just ask her in an email to do something by a certain time. If she doesn’t do it and she hasn’t forewarned you/given acceptable reasons in advance/it’s not a capacity issue, gather it as evidence. Once you have a few and it is having a deleterious effect on things, put her on a PIP (unless she has less than 1 year and 51 weeks’ service at the point of dismissal) in which case dismiss.
3. Proper exploding, with raised voices, is unacceptable and that you have excused her is a performance issue on your part. First occurrence if not too major, informal warning in person followed up by email. Second one, formal disciplinary, which depending on the severity could a final warning. Next time - dismissal. You can foreshorten this process if she doesn’t have 1yr 51 weeks’ service.
4. Failure to manage and deal with it appropriately is a performance issue on your part.

I wouldn’t trust somebody who repeatedly lied about having done work when they hadn’t. Why on earth would OP trust a proven liar?