If there's just a few of you for Xmas how do you make it special?

[DungareesAndTrombones]

Due to loads of horrible stuff going on this year it looks like it will be me, DH and DS13 on our own for Christmas. Anyone else in the same situation what do you do to make it lovely and special? We've always had really big Christmas days in the past and I'm feeling really sad about it, but thinking I need to make an effort or I will spend the whole day crying.

Are there any other local families in a similar boat? We've had nice christmases with friends as well as with family.

It's Dh and I this year, it was a conscious decision because the last few Christmases have been incredibly stressful for various reasons.
We'll get our favourite food and some treats, visit MiL in her care home and weather permitting go for a walk to feed the ducks.
DH works in retail, with a lot of compulsory overtime and by Christmas eve he'll be totally shattered, both with work and taking care of me, because I'm disabled and can do very little round the house.

It Doesn't need to be special, it will be lovely as it is. Cook a roast, play a game, watch a film such as home alone, or trains, planes and automobiles, you eat anything and just relax and enjoy.

13 is about the age you can plan a slightly more grown-up Christmas but a lot will depend on what type of 13-year-old yours is. If the weather is good in the morning, plan a walk somewhere interesting even if it involves a drive. Does your child have an interest you could pursue with them? Are you near the sea? Would you dare go for a quick Christmas Day dip if the weather was good enough? Your child won't forget that. Take a flask of hot chocolate and some special nibbles and turn it into an adventure. Or go out for a bike ride together.

Late lunch (I'd just roast a chicken) and then snooze or play time, then a games evening. Make cocktails/ mocktails. Find a game or activity you can all participate in or play cards or start a jigsaw. Try to stay off screens. My best Christmas memories are of togetherness and getting attention from my dad as well as my mum. Have a lovely time.

It mainly been just me and my two children on Christmas Day for the last few years. We have a chilled out, no stress Christmas, no fuss and fancy, we just go with the flow. The only rule we have is we all spend all day together downstairs, no skulking off to their rooms. We do allow visitors now, but they have go along with the no fuss!
Do what means something for you all and ignore the bits you have done for others. Enjoy!

Some of the sillier games we play are 'skittling the elfs'. We each decorate some toilet rolls as elves with a marker then use an Xmas pudding (we hate eating them) as a bowling ball down our hallway and keep score very seriously like it is proper bowling. We do the suck and blow card game. Don't let the balloon touch the floor. Pin the carrot on the snowman. My son is incredibly dyslexic so our games are ridiculous and inclusive.

Just be silly. I do empathise OP. We are a gay couple with two kids. Unfortunately our wider family are not always that accepting. We have realised on Xmas day, we are more than enough.

Don't let the bastards grinch you down.

Oh piss off 🙄 there’s always bloody one!

@ManateeFair oh I'm embarrassed now. I genuinely did miss the bit about the horrible stuff. That'll teach me to read properly before replying.

@DungareesAndTrombones I do apologise for my post. I hope you have a lovely Christmas.

It’s really tough at first, OP but it’s mainly the thought of it. In the event, small Christmases have always ended up lovely and relaxed. I only do the food that everyone loves, but mostly we do everything we did before only on a smaller scale and it ends up being lovely and relaxed because there’s a whole lot less cooking! Hope it’s the same for you.

I don't know what your DS is like but my similar age DD can be quite volatile in her moods because, hey, she's a teenager. I think my concern would be that, if she's in a grump, that could bring the mood down. Normally, we would just give her some space but it would be harder to do that on Christmas Day as you feel like you should be together.
If she was on good form (as she is 80% of the time), I imagine we would have a really chilled day, doing what we want & when we want. The downside from my perspective is that no one other than me in my household likes some of the food & drinks I grew up with having at Christmas. If we've got my family staying, then I buy it all in knowing that they'll enjoy it too. If it was just me, I might cut back as otherwise some of it would get wasted.

Also, what did you do in those lockdown Christmases? We had never had Christmas by ourselves until then. I think that that was different though as most people were in the same position of just being with their households.

Let your DS choose some really lovely/fancy treats and save them for Christmas Day. Games! Jenga and 5 second rule always have us laughing. We tend not to watch telly Christmas Day, it just feels a bit mundane to all be sitting staring at the box?
A quiz/quiz game is always loads of fun too.
I’m sorry your family are treating you like this. I hope you have a wonderful day with your husband and son.

Sorry you’re not going to have the Christmas you’d hoped for.

I have a small one- just my 2 DC and me, for various logistical reasons.
If you haven’t got your tree up yet, then maybe wait and do it much nearer Christmas.
It makes it feel more ‘festive’ as a small household when it goes up close to the day (to me- I know everyone is different)

Charity shops for board games. If you’re into them. DS was a sore loser so we never really stuck to that, but it looks a cosy activity for the less competitive!

Keep dinner lovely, but simple. It’s rubbish clearing up a load of dishes.

Stockings for you all!

It’s not always a popular subject, but I’ve done Christmas Eve boxes since Dd was about 8 (she’s 24 now) because she’d always put her scabbiest pjs on and then be photographed in them Christmas morning.

They just have pyjamas, a mug, a book, and a box of biscuits in them. It makes Christmas Eve nicer and a bit easier alone.

I hope you have a lovely day, even if it’s different. 🎄

Funny old time Christmas. I think @DaphneduM said it best.
I love Christmas, but thinking back, a fair few have been awful! So I keep it very simple, I prepare the bits that make me happy and I feel gratitude for what I do have.
This year I think it may be just me and my Christmas pudding for 12!
Have a lovely Christmas sweetheart.

Bit of xmas music on, nice smelling candles, cook together (one of my happiest xmas memeories was sitting at my sisters kitchen table peeling veg and just chatting) go for a walk, choose a xmas movie. I’d go with making it feel cosy.

No mention of money, lunch out, days away lol. Just like any other day it will come and go.

I really truly hope that you’re not this miserable in real life. Especially if you have kids.

@wideawakeinthemiddleofthenightagain
don't know what your DS is like but my similar age DD can be quite volatile in her moods because, hey, she's a teenager. I think my concern would be that, if she's in a grump, that could bring the mood down. Normally, we would just give her some space but it would be harder to do that on Christmas Day as you feel like you should be together.
This is definitely an issue. The dynamic with just three people where only one is a "child" (whatever age) is so different from a couple of kids and one adult. And feeling that you have to make the most of it, although you are sad that other people don't want invite the three if you or call in, is very hard. No one needs to be told to go for a walk, watch Christmas films, play games, just relax. We can work that out for ourselves!

Aren't you a delight, bet everyday is super exciting with you around.