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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU or is this mad behaviour on a train?

304 replies

capermum · 05/12/2023 20:38

So today I have a meeting the other side of the country today and I get an early train, guy in my seat when I arrive but shifts over for me (it’s a table of 4)
I’m window forward facing
he’s aisle forward facing

But THEN! The guy reaches down into a carrier bag on the floor and pulls out a large bowl which he places on top of his laptop, then reaches down again and retrieves a box of cornflakes that he tips into said massive bowl and then pulls out a big bottle of milk, pours it on the flakes and proceeds to munch away while watching iplayer though headphones like munch munch munch right in my effing ear, it’s not first class or anything so the seats are very close to each other.

I wouldn’t even sit next to my DH to eat cereal that close let alone a stranger!!!

After about 2 mins of this I interrupted his viewing and say “You have to let me out! I have to move while you eat, this is so antisocial and I can’t bear it”
“But I’m nearly finished” he says agog
“But I can’t bear to listen to another mouthful!”

So i do indeed leave while he finished and read my book further down the train where I can, in fact, still bloody hear him munch-munching away…

Then when it’s safe I return to my seat and get back to work

Oh yeah and when I’d arrived I get out my laptop and set it up to work, he reaches right across me an plugs into the socket that would have been closest to me, before I have a chance to, the passenger across from me notes this and offers me his socket with a knowing look, so is this further proof he’s a without doubt a total psycho?

I think in the end I made him as uncomfortable as he made me by calling him out, so I guess we are quits (for now)

It’s quite out of character for me to confront anyone ever, so tell me, is this totally antisocial or am I being over sensitive? and if I’m you think I’m being too soft then, please tell me what’s the worst outrageous antisocial behaviour you’ve witnessed on a train?

My colleague just told me she watched someone clipping their toenails once with those clippers that fling the nails every which way. So that’s probably worse

OP posts:
Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 22:56

Seems to me like opinions quite divided - yes I’m probably a mad woman (totally with you all on that) and eating big sloppy bowls on a train is cool. So next time I’ll bring my spaghetti meatballs without a second thought?

Where do we draw the line?!

helppp!!!

OP posts:
Ormally · 05/12/2023 22:59

Things I have found weird on a train:

  • Group of kids doing laughing gas from balloons (about 3pm)
  • Person doing coke off the back of seat table in front of them (first class carriage, late at night)
  • Well dressed man with rucksack on (very drunk, it turns out) walks up the centre aisle to the articulated space between 2 carriages and has a wee in the space (about 8pm).
  • Several instances of people loudly purchasing something on the phone reading out their credit card numbers, expiry date, and 3 digit code on the reverse to the whole carriage.

So no, having breakfast at breakfast time on a busy train, not so disturbing to me.

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:05

NotMeNoNo · 05/12/2023 22:23

I know we would all ideally wait for the destination but when you are in a four or five hour journey that means leaving home at 5am and short changes that don't have time for a leisurely lunch, the train is the only place you can physically sit down to eat. Repeat on the way home where you are in transit from 4pm to 9pm. Not everyone is on a 20 minute commute.

I nearly always have a coffee and something non crunchy like a croissant or sandwich and I'm not a messy eater. But eating on trains has been a thing ever since there were trains.

I don’t disagree with you eating on trains is a necessity of life
I guess this wasn’t really a commuter train though: 8:40 leaving london so not super full either and I got up just before 7 and had time for a shower breakfast with the family and an hour across town to make the train. I bet it’s tougher on a commute when you leave at a really early hour and there’s no chance of breakfast before hitting your desk

OP posts:
Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:06

Ormally · 05/12/2023 22:59

Things I have found weird on a train:

  • Group of kids doing laughing gas from balloons (about 3pm)
  • Person doing coke off the back of seat table in front of them (first class carriage, late at night)
  • Well dressed man with rucksack on (very drunk, it turns out) walks up the centre aisle to the articulated space between 2 carriages and has a wee in the space (about 8pm).
  • Several instances of people loudly purchasing something on the phone reading out their credit card numbers, expiry date, and 3 digit code on the reverse to the whole carriage.

So no, having breakfast at breakfast time on a busy train, not so disturbing to me.

Wow you win

did everyone jot down the number ?!

OP posts:
Ormally · 05/12/2023 23:07

It wouldn't surprise me! Sometimes they repeat the long number too.

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:10

Ormally · 05/12/2023 23:07

It wouldn't surprise me! Sometimes they repeat the long number too.

I remember Lenny Henry doing this live on comic relief by mistake demonstrating how easy it was to donate and dawn french pointing out he now has to call the bank to cancel the card !!!

OP posts:
Shuggie1234 · 05/12/2023 23:11

Weird!
on the train the other day woman in 40s flossing her teeth with one of those bit of floss on a plastic stick things, taking it out intermittently to examine the blood etc on it for an entire hours train journey. Totally disgusting 🤢

Lifeomars · 05/12/2023 23:12

Not train related but still public transport, one of my mates witnessed someone shooting up smack on the top deck of a but in London

Martha645 · 05/12/2023 23:14

Many years ago on a train for London City. Middle aged businessman wearing smart dark suit, white shirt and tie, reading the Daily Mirror. On approaching the station he reaches into his briefcase, gets out The Times, tucks it under his arm and gets off the train leaving the Mirror on the seat.

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:19

Martha645 · 05/12/2023 23:14

Many years ago on a train for London City. Middle aged businessman wearing smart dark suit, white shirt and tie, reading the Daily Mirror. On approaching the station he reaches into his briefcase, gets out The Times, tucks it under his arm and gets off the train leaving the Mirror on the seat.

😂

and I wonder where he is now… maybe in parliament !

OP posts:
theilltemperedclavecinist · 05/12/2023 23:21

A long time ago it was considered rude to eat in public, and almost everyone was thin. But that wasn't making money for anybody was it? Now you can't go twenty paces without encountering a food outlet.

OP YANBU but you might have been happier in the 50s. In this respect anyway.

Comtesse · 05/12/2023 23:23

I saw someone clean their ears with cotton buds and then drop them on the floor of the bus. Bleurgh.

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:28

theilltemperedclavecinist · 05/12/2023 23:21

A long time ago it was considered rude to eat in public, and almost everyone was thin. But that wasn't making money for anybody was it? Now you can't go twenty paces without encountering a food outlet.

OP YANBU but you might have been happier in the 50s. In this respect anyway.

Yes! I think I would too. Nice and tidy.

( Apart for the bit about living prior to the second wave feminism)

OP posts:
CrapBucket · 05/12/2023 23:29

My son has misophonia so I’m annoyed by noisy eaters on his behalf (even if he’s not with me) - your fellow passenger was defo a Cereal Wierdo. I was curling my eyelashes on the train the other day wondering if I was being anti social when I saw a woman clipping her finger nails, felt repulsed and relieved at the same time…

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:30

CrapBucket · 05/12/2023 23:29

My son has misophonia so I’m annoyed by noisy eaters on his behalf (even if he’s not with me) - your fellow passenger was defo a Cereal Wierdo. I was curling my eyelashes on the train the other day wondering if I was being anti social when I saw a woman clipping her finger nails, felt repulsed and relieved at the same time…

😂

this made my evening “repulsed and relieved”

OP posts:
ShiteRider · 05/12/2023 23:31

capermum · 05/12/2023 22:30

I agree!

Show quote history

You agree that you are more strange than him?

unsync · 05/12/2023 23:31

When you commute daily you see, hear and smell all sorts. People are gross and inconsiderate, especially those that don't use the trains regularly.

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:39

ShiteRider · 05/12/2023 23:31

You agree that you are more strange than him?

Show quote history

Or equally? Like, we are all weird humans, I found him odd the other posters found me odd, all are valid opinions I agree in that sense that yes they are right

OP posts:
Katbum · 05/12/2023 23:39

This sounds a lie but I swear on my life it’s true: I once watched someone floss their teeth with strands of hair they pulled out their head and wrapped into a stronger kind of rope-device on a train. People are absolutely wild and there is no sense to it.

SingleMum11 · 05/12/2023 23:40

This is so annoying. I honestly don’t know how anyone could just be ‘chill’ with this!

But maybe I’m just an intolerant person, it actually causes my mind pain and I would have to move. Probably saying ‘ffs sake’ under my breath.

It’s also really bad manners.

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:41

Katbum · 05/12/2023 23:39

This sounds a lie but I swear on my life it’s true: I once watched someone floss their teeth with strands of hair they pulled out their head and wrapped into a stronger kind of rope-device on a train. People are absolutely wild and there is no sense to it.

Stop!!!! Like for real?

that’s a good (bad) one

OP posts:
Katbum · 05/12/2023 23:42

I swear. Nutzoid

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:44

ilovesooty · 05/12/2023 21:19

So it was pretty minor then? Not worth creating a drama about?

Show quote history

I think calling him a word that offended another poster was indeed an overstatement as I was calling into question whether I was myself overreacting

OP posts:
leachesleachesleachesleachesleaches · 05/12/2023 23:45

welcometothnuthouse · 05/12/2023 21:04

Why don't you look up what a psychopath is before you label random strangers OP? As a low level diagnosed psychopath I find your comment about his behaviour offensive.

I’d much rather be associated with cereal man than a serial killer.

Original poster
capermum · 05/12/2023 23:46

Prettypaisleyslippers · 05/12/2023 20:56

On most trains in the morning there are people drinking coffee, eating pastries etc, I sometimes buy a yoghurt with that cereal on, is that as bad?

Not at all! That’s not a big sloppy noisy mess plus it’s available in pret.

although someone did post that you can buy cereal on trains with milk so I’ve probably lost the plot for sure…

But then I doubt you can buy massive bowls full of it

seriously like 25cm diameter

OP posts: