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Original poster

Please tell me age two onwards is easier than age 1? I’m not coping well

60 replies

jiarhadwbough · 05/12/2023 14:33

Just the title really. Lone parent to a one year old. I’m finding it so hard. I work four days then with her 3 days. I do have money for extra childcare but haven’t felt the need to do that yet. I will if it comes to it. Just wondering if two gets easier? I feel so fed up with it all.

OP posts:
Greensaber · 05/12/2023 14:34

Yes I find 2 easier than 1. It has its own challenges yes but at 1 you have to watch them non stop, they’re into everything and don’t understand danger! I find at 2 this gets a bit easier.

Didimum · 05/12/2023 14:35

I definitely found 2 significantly better.

DuploTrain · 05/12/2023 14:35

I found it so much more rewarding once DS was closer to 2… he could talk more, was more interested in things. Just better company all round.

Greensaber · 05/12/2023 14:36

I find the key is to get out every morning, home for lunch, nap. Afternoons drag a bit though.

sleepymama3 · 05/12/2023 14:37

18 months to 2 was lovely. Few hiccups between 2.5 and 3. 3 onwards is mostly delightful.

Cas112 · 05/12/2023 14:38

Have you not heard of terrible two's?

dotdotdotdash · 05/12/2023 14:38

Yes, it gets easier. 1 to 2 is hard as they have no sense of danger whatsoever, and as they can't talk, they screech a lot! Any family or friends nearby you can have a regular meet up with on your days at home?

Ponoka7 · 05/12/2023 14:38

Yes once they are walking, can go on the park/soft play independently, so get tired out, it's a lot easier. I'm my DD's childcare and I babysit a lot for people, it's the 9-18 months that are difficult. Don't worry about screens, when the time comes, as long as they are balanced out they are fine.

muggart · 05/12/2023 14:39

My DD is 2 and it's miles easier. When she started walking that helped a lot because we could just walk around and she'd be endlessly entertained. At 18 months, she started eating more, another big help, and she was talking a fair bit by that point too.

At 2, it is like having a little buddy who makes jokes and loves to cuddle you. Also, immune system gets stronger! That's a big improvement too.

TurnTheDamnedLightsOff · 05/12/2023 14:39

Yes it gets easier in that they hit milestones that allow you to have some rest and time to sit and have a coffee. It also gets harder because it's a new age and development stage you've not encountered before.

The first 4 years are relentless but they do settle down until about 10 or 11 (y6) when it ramps up again until 15 when it's at its worst then tapers off.

Get a good support network around you!

Overthebow · 05/12/2023 14:40

I didn't find age 2 easier than 1, but I have found 3 a lot easier than both 1 and 2! Probably depends on your child.

Myyearmytime · 06/12/2023 07:50

You are looking after a person than around every 6 months or so changes .It is hard work .
.

Raspberried · 06/12/2023 07:52

Yes I found 18 months the worst with both of mine. Gets much easier when you can have a proper conversation with them!

Beezknees · 06/12/2023 07:53

Yes. I found it easier the older he got. Also a lone parent. He's 15 now and it's a breeze. I know it's not like that for everyone though.

MoltenLasagne · 06/12/2023 07:53

2 has its challenges but I find it so much easier now DS has language and is at least capable of following instructions, even if it is a battle of wills as to whether he will actually do it.

gamerchick · 06/12/2023 07:55

It get easier from 4 imo. Walk their legs off for in between any chance you get.

Zanatdy · 06/12/2023 07:55

I remember with ds2 age 1-2 was really tough, and I was so worried 2-3 would be worse due to the notorious terrible 2’s. But it was easier, probably as he became verbal and was able to communicate better. It’s not easy raising kids alone, I have been a single parent most of my kids life, ds2 was at nursery full time and I remember one bank holiday weekend we were struggling (Easter) as he was tantrum after tantrum. Since he turned 3 he’s never given me a days trouble, even the teen years, 19 now and at Uni and such a good boy. There’s light at the end of the tunnel

ThreeRingCircus · 06/12/2023 07:57

I found it gets progressively easier and a bit less relentless. 2 obviously had it's challenges, as did all ages but they gradually get a bit of independence, sleep gets better etc. DD1 is now 6 and the perfect age in my opinion, I want to freeze her at this stage🤣. DD2 is now 4 and so much easier than she was at 1 or 2. No more nappies, they can dress themselves, they'll sit and play or watch TV quietly and I can have a cup of tea in peace, they sleep through, they're really good fun etc.

Hang on in there, it gets better.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 06/12/2023 08:01

I could have cried for joy last month when my youngest turned 3- no more toddlers no more toddlers!
I love my children of course but hated from 1-3, such a hard age, so physical, little comprehension.
Absolutely love a 3yr old- don’t get me wrong she still has her moments but as her speech develops and she’s controlled, no highchair, toilet trained- I love it!

Jellybean85 · 06/12/2023 08:08

I found it easier when they got better talking, they could articulate their needs and frustrations better so way easier

shivawn · 06/12/2023 08:12

Definitely easier and better and more fun! I have a 25 month old who is a budding comedian and makes me laugh at the stuff he comes out with everyday! Sleep is way better these days, it was always up and down at 1.

Obviously there's the temper tantrums etc to deal with now but they are short lived and don't bother me too much.

How many months is your one year old? I think things got much better at 20 months, that's when mine started having a language explosion and starting sentences.

BeanyBops · 06/12/2023 08:13

100%. My little girl was a very sensitive high needs (difficult, imo, although I loved her) baby and has gotten easier by the month! She's now 3. 5 and it's been an upwards trajectory the entire time. Hang in there!

HickoryStump · 06/12/2023 08:17

Yeah I got quite depressed in that 1-2 year. Particularly alongside going back to work. 2-3 has been much better, despite tantrums, we get on really well and I accepted I'm not an endlessly-facinated-with-my-child-supermum.
I'd def consider an extra day/half day childcare so you can have a few hours remembering you're not just someone's mum or just someone's employee or falling asleep. Will partner agree a morning a weekend where you're totally off the hook?

HickoryStump · 06/12/2023 08:18

Just saw no partner - parents? Siblings? Even if they just sit with her for nap time, you can go grab a coffee and read a book?

FallingAutumnLeaf · 06/12/2023 08:35

It gets different.
Whether the different is good for you or tough depends on the parent and the child.
For me, once he was moving it got easier, and then once he was properly talking, he was a delight. So, yes, my baby-stage hating baby was definitely a more pleasant toddler. And a delightful preschooler and onwards.

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