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Original poster

Please tell me age two onwards is easier than age 1? I’m not coping well

60 replies

jiarhadwbough · 05/12/2023 14:33

Just the title really. Lone parent to a one year old. I’m finding it so hard. I work four days then with her 3 days. I do have money for extra childcare but haven’t felt the need to do that yet. I will if it comes to it. Just wondering if two gets easier? I feel so fed up with it all.

OP posts:
Pippylongstock · 06/12/2023 08:37

Of course tantrums are hard but nothing like the lemming stage where they put themselves in mortal danger all the time. Hang in there, get support when you feel overwhelmed. In general I’ve found parenting easier at each stage than the 0-2

thelonemommabear · 06/12/2023 08:38

It's different - not necessarily easier different but challenging in different ways. I became a single parent when my twins were 1 - have to say i find 2 pretty hard but that's probably because I'm outnumbered and they gang up on me 😂

booksandbrooks · 06/12/2023 08:39

Or the threenager, and the fecking 4s 🤪

I loved 2 and 3 but I know plenty who didn't.

With one reception she was harder, with the other it was so much easier. I think it depends on both of your personalities.

Which bits do you find hard OP?

I particularly like the sweet spot between not needing a changing a bag but still taking a buggy so you can walk fast and go further but don't need the big bag.

FallingAutumnLeaf · 06/12/2023 09:23

I particularly like the sweet spot between not needing a changing a bag but still taking a buggy so you can walk fast and go further but don't need the big bag.

See this is where they are all different. We were buggy-less by 2.5, but still had a chance bag til nearer 3.

Topjoe19 · 06/12/2023 09:24

I loved age 2 with mine.

Hopingforno2in2024 · 06/12/2023 09:25

Much easier ime. They can talk at 2 which makes things so much simpler.

Justfinking · 06/12/2023 09:26

I'm finding 2.5 so much harder, yes they're more self sufficient, but it also means they get into more mischief and need closer monitoring and more entertainment/stimulation

89redballoons · 06/12/2023 09:29

With both of mine I've found about 14 - 20 months really tough. They've got lots of opinions but they can't talk much and they can't focus on anything long enough to play by themselves even for 5 minutes. It does change. More talking doesn't solve everything (they remain completely illogical and hard to please for a good while yet) but I did find it makes things more interesting.

Redcrayons · 06/12/2023 09:32

As they get older, it’s not necessarily easier, just different.

What is it you’re finding difficult? Are you working and looking after your DC at the same time?

IgnoranceNotOk · 06/12/2023 09:41

It does get easier. There are set backs and tantrums when they’ve wanted a cut up apple so you’ve cut it up but they want it whole and the world ends but it is easier as they start to get older.
1-2 was hell with DS1 and DS2 was a dream until he was 3 and then he was a whingy pain!
but now they’re 4&5 they play independently, colour, bake!
I can get things done much easier whereas even with just DS1 he needed so much attention and I was so stressed just trying to do a meal.

hang on in there! They get easier and more fun to be with!

Badgerandfox227 · 06/12/2023 09:41

Definitely a hard age, and it does get easier. As other posters have said, they start to communicate and be more interested in the world around them. I very much found getting out the house every day for a few ours kept me sane. Go to the coffee shop or meet some friends or a soft play etc.

FairytaleChristmas · 06/12/2023 11:38

Every age has its challenges but I was told when my first turned 1 that the next 12 months would be the hardest. 2 children in and that's what I've found to be absolutely true.

Once they start talking and can really begin to understand a conversation a little, the challenges change but overall it's easier. They begin to understand the why behind things a little (again it's still a limited amount) and they begin to 'help', they dont want to be carried or held and they start using their imagination.

2 also has it's hard parts, so does every age but there's something to love about every stage too.

NewLevelsOfTiredness · 06/12/2023 11:55

Hopingforno2in2024 · 06/12/2023 09:25

Much easier ime. They can talk at 2 which makes things so much simpler.

Although it can be a few years after that that they learn how to stop talking...

Chipsahoyagain · 06/12/2023 11:56

Mine is 1 and I hate this age. The thing I hate, hate, hate most is carrying them. I cannot wait for her to walk. Also find this age so utterly boring, no attention span and I can't wait for the next stage.

MilkChocolateCookie · 06/12/2023 12:00

I found my DC hard at 1yo. Old enough to be "naughty" but not old enough to understand explanations and consequences.

Kattiekat · 06/12/2023 12:01

having been in that situation. I worked full time and. I it doesn’t get any easier.
but you get used to it. It takes a year or two to adjust.
the issues just change as they grow up.
getting them dressed problems will become dropping off and collecting to activities.

but that’s how it always has been and will be. Even if you weren’t a single parent. Always chalked just different ones.

i found that getting out as much as possible.
relaxing as much as possible in the evening
accepting that this is the way life is now
all helped me to adjust.

BeckyBoo1224 · 06/12/2023 12:06

I found two so much better than one. I realised struggled the first time round then decided to have another who is now 1 and has reminded me of how hard it is. Even with everything that being 2 can bring like tantrums etc it's still sooo much better.

ginandtonicwithlimes · 06/12/2023 12:08

Being honest? It didn't for my daughter. 2-4 were particularly difficult! My son is 22 months and is beginning to tantrum quite a bit. Some of that is due to not being able to say much yet. We always go out in the morning to toddler groups and come home for a nap.

Unfortunately it depends on the type of child you have.

DecemberSleet · 06/12/2023 12:10

For me every age has been easier than the last. I found age 1 horrific for each child. It has been easier and easier ever since...

4 year age gap between each child too!

ginandtonicwithlimes · 06/12/2023 12:10

Chipsahoyagain · 06/12/2023 11:56

Mine is 1 and I hate this age. The thing I hate, hate, hate most is carrying them. I cannot wait for her to walk. Also find this age so utterly boring, no attention span and I can't wait for the next stage.

Can't you put them in the pushchair? Yeah they can scream all they want, plank, smack but they are going in there. I don't have time on school runs for my son to practice his walking. Too bloody heavy to carry for long.

Ndhdiwntbsivnwg · 06/12/2023 13:21

Honestly the older they get the harder it is.

Chipsahoyagain · 06/12/2023 15:12

@ginandtonicwithlimes my baby hates the pushchair and absolutely goes berserk in her high chair. It's utterly draining. I am carrying her so much I hate it. I can't wait till she walks so that at least at home she doesn't need to be carried.

Historybooks · 06/12/2023 15:13

It's different. You say you didn't need the extra childcare yet you're fed up. Consider 5 days nursery to get time to yourself, to tidy etc..

Historybooks · 06/12/2023 15:14

Ndhdiwntbsivnwg · 06/12/2023 13:21

Honestly the older they get the harder it is.

I just think it's different. I found 2 harder than one. I found it got easier from age 3.

AngryBirdsNoMore · 06/12/2023 15:16

MUCH easier. Less boring and lonely, much more interesting. They’re engaging little people, walking and talking, rather than little babies.

I found one really hard. I’m really enjoying two.