to expect my son with tummy upset to be able to go to the loo in school?

[windygalestoday]

in short ....ds1 ds2 both have tummy upset ds1 is bad enough not to be at school ds2 chooses to go to school...after lunch he gets bad tummy cramp(hes 12 btw) and realises he needs the loo ,he raises hand and asks to go .....NO says the teacher you should have gone at lunch (hes never asked to leave room b4 for loo all term) realising hes going to to need to go ,he leaves the room saying i have to go miss ....goes to loo returns to class feeling shakey and a bit embarassed (tmi but smelly stools) the teacher immediately yells at him in front of class he says 'miss with all respect i needed to go i couldnt wait' this she informs him will get you in big trouble (it was an art lesson and no science experiment or maths problems were being explained) son leaves it unwilling to divulge to whole class why he had left the room ,at the end of the lesson he approaches teacher to explain and is told he cannot undo his 'wrongdoing' but miss he says needing the toilet isnt something i can help .......well later that afternoon about tea time i get a call from senior staff saying about this episode ....im appalled (and i told her this) that a teacher who is being paid a salary the same as you had you fone me up bcos my son went to the loo ,this happened in her lesson and its her problem to resolve,had she listened to him she would know and your time wouldnt be wasted foning me .....

i know she wasnt to know he was ill when he asked could he go, but can it wait or go now and see me when u come back surely would have sufficed?

This drives me insane - if a child has vomiting or diarrhoea they shouldn't be at school. It is totally irresponsible & inconsiderate.

If a child (and by child I mean 11-16 years which is the age I teach) has been bugging me like mad to go to the loo then I have been known to use my discretion. I always refuse permission first ask, but if a girl whispers to me that it's her period then of course I let her go. If any pupil quietly hissed to me that there was another kind of emergency then I think I'd give them the benefit of the doubt. The kids I don't let out are the type that when I refuse to let them go, shout at the top of their voices "Oh I'll just wet/poo myself then", but funnily enough, they never do!

But like I said before, if the teacher doesn;t see the class that often and she doesn't know the OP's ds then she's probably just being a bit of a jobsworth for the school rules. It's a difficult one. I think if it had been me, I'd have let him go but told him on return that I'd be passing his name and the time he left the class to the office after the lesson, to cover both our backs if there was some kind of incident out of the room (like a theft).

He shouldn't have been in school with a bug, as others have said they are so easy to pass on. It's very selfish actually as other children could and probably will become ill because of this.

In my last school the toilets were kept locked during lessons due to vandalism. On the rare occasions I allowed a child to leave the class to use the loo, they had to take a pass, go to reception, get the key and return it afterwards.

You have to use your discretion as Moomin says. Just letting all requests go unchallenged would in many classes be enormously disruptive.

PLEASE read the whole thread before commenting and dont call me irresponsible til you know the full facts.

He probably shouldn't have been in school really because he would pass his germs onto others and then those parents have to take care of their sick kids and if they work this is a problem however I do not believe any child should ever be refused permission to go to the toilet during lesson time. Would the teacher do the same thing to a teenage girl when she has her period?? (totally show her up in front of other kids?) I once had a boss who wanted to know what I was taking into the toilet and made me show my tampon holder to everyone in the office (I was 16 in my first job). Tummy problem or not some children need to go straight away and the school shouldn't hold this against them. My daughter has said the same thing to me before at her school and I keep saying to them respect your teachers but if you need to go then go and I'll deal with the stroppy phone call!