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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nanny christmas bonus

244 replies

Letsgetouttahere2023 · 17/11/2023 00:13

I love my nanny and want to show her that this Christmas. Been googling Christmas bonus for nannies and a lot of people say they give 1 week net salary as bonus, which for us would be £500. I just can't afford this!!! Nannies is this what you expect? For context I don't get a Christmas bonus in my job, hence not sure.

OP posts:
itsalongwaybackfromsorry · 19/11/2023 12:56

I do get that. I'm looking at it from the nanny's point of view. Nannies talk, and in areas it's hard to find a good nanny, it can be quite competitive to keep them.

HarrietStyles · 19/11/2023 13:01

Also, don’t break the bank getting an expensive gift/bonus unless you can afford to do similar every year. I nannied for a family that gave me £1k Christmas bonus two years in a row (which was obviously very generous of them and I very much appreciated it) but then on the third year they said on my last day before Christmas “sorry we couldn’t afford it this year, here’s a photo frame”……… when I knew full well that they were flying to California for a 2 week luxury holiday the next day!

Sunday12 · 19/11/2023 13:08

Letsgetouttahere2023 · 17/11/2023 20:58

Because I have to spend 2k a month on a nanny!! And eat!

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I can understand this and it’s not like having the spare money to afford full time nanny whilst you’re at home relaxing.( Although anyone who can afford help good luck to you!)
I think a gift or day off is lovely.
ive never received Christmas gifts from work and I’ve had lots of jobs. Would be nice though!

also I opened this thread thinking it’s another where grandma is not wanted for Christmas Day visit!

Notjustabrunette · 19/11/2023 13:12

ZenNudist · 17/11/2023 00:17

£500 doesn't seem a lot if you can afford a nanny.

That’s a bit presumptuous. Getting a nanny can be cheaper than nursery for more than one child.

TheKnittedCharacter · 19/11/2023 13:14

I think there's an expectation that nannies get good bonuses at Christmas (I know this from friends - we never had one). £500 seems to be the average, but if you can't afford it, you can't afford it.

Give her a bonus that you can afford. £250 would be ok imo.

Notjustabrunette · 19/11/2023 13:21

hattie43 · 17/11/2023 06:16

How can someone afford a £2k per month nanny and not be able to find another £500 Xmas gift . Makes no sense to me .

Would you be saying the same if they were paying 2k in nursery and school wrap around care? I think the fact that they are paying 2k would mean they don’t have spare cash.

Notjustabrunette · 19/11/2023 13:28

LuckySantangelo35 · 19/11/2023 10:07

What about a week in the Caribbean all exclusive?

i Would definitely be up for some of that!

KingofIthaca · 19/11/2023 15:18

Sunday12 · 19/11/2023 13:08

I can understand this and it’s not like having the spare money to afford full time nanny whilst you’re at home relaxing.( Although anyone who can afford help good luck to you!)
I think a gift or day off is lovely.
ive never received Christmas gifts from work and I’ve had lots of jobs. Would be nice though!

also I opened this thread thinking it’s another where grandma is not wanted for Christmas Day visit!

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Me too🤣🤣

Lifetooshort23 · 19/11/2023 15:19

Yeah… what?! I can’t think of any standard job that would be paying even £250 Christmas bonus! This is nuts!

Concannon88 · 19/11/2023 15:30

That's lovely, doesnt make it any less of a cringe present though

Concannon88 · 19/11/2023 15:31

And what's your point?

sensationalsally · 19/11/2023 15:41

You need to give one week's wages as a bonus. TBH, if you can afford to pay her £500 pw net, you can afford one extra week. If you don't want to, give her an extra week's paid leave. Same difference.

TravellingT · 19/11/2023 15:57

We give 2 weeks salary+tangible gift to all employees (nannies, housekeeper, gardener). We started offering 2 weeks holiday/2 weeks pay and they all chose pay so we went with it.

TiredMummma · 19/11/2023 15:57

HerkyBaby · 17/11/2023 07:23

I’m quite sure you can afford the £500. Imagine yours and the children’s life without her . This needs to be viewed as an annual retainer and please don’t leave us for a family that pays higher wages/ bonuses, travels extensively and provides a better car for the nanny. Just pay the £500 and thank your lucky stars that you have a decent nanny that you and the children love.

I can get over nonsense comments like this, some people are going into debt to cover the cost of a nanny just so they can get childcare. Why on earth would someone take a loan or use a credit card for a nonsense bonus no one has heard of? My nursery fees for two kids is over £2k. It's taking every single penny. If I was asked to do a Christmas present like this by the nursery I would be remortgaging. Buy her a card & a bottle of wine

VanityDiesHard · 19/11/2023 15:59

sensationalsally · 19/11/2023 15:41

You need to give one week's wages as a bonus. TBH, if you can afford to pay her £500 pw net, you can afford one extra week. If you don't want to, give her an extra week's paid leave. Same difference.

Are you having a laugh? Have you not read the thread and the OP's posts? This isn't something that is routinely given or expected at all. In rich households, maybe, in regular ones, not. Good grief.

TiredMummma · 19/11/2023 15:59

@MrsBennetsPoorNerves she literally says she can't afford it in the OP....

NuffSaidSam · 19/11/2023 16:01

willWillSmithsmith · 19/11/2023 10:19

Would it though? If a boss gave their employee the choice of a £500 bonus or a card would people really choose the card because it would be ‘worth more’. I can’t imagine any situation I’d rather be given a card over cash.

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In the scenario where they've made you choose, there wouldn't be a lot of love in the card! I'm not suggesting that literally a piece of cardboard is more valuable that £500. It's more about the sentiment.

Being valued at work is worth a lot ime (and according to research). People who really feel valued and appreciated at work, like they're making a tangible difference to someone's life have much better mental health, self-esteem, positive feelings about work etc. Everything isn't about money.

Obviously if you desperately need that money then it's different. If you're a well paid nanny then you shouldn't be desperate for cash, it's a lovely bonus but not a need.

willWillSmithsmith · 19/11/2023 17:09

NuffSaidSam · 19/11/2023 16:01

In the scenario where they've made you choose, there wouldn't be a lot of love in the card! I'm not suggesting that literally a piece of cardboard is more valuable that £500. It's more about the sentiment.

Being valued at work is worth a lot ime (and according to research). People who really feel valued and appreciated at work, like they're making a tangible difference to someone's life have much better mental health, self-esteem, positive feelings about work etc. Everything isn't about money.

Obviously if you desperately need that money then it's different. If you're a well paid nanny then you shouldn't be desperate for cash, it's a lovely bonus but not a need.

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I’d still rather have the money 😁

moomoomoo27 · 19/11/2023 17:24

we do £500 Christmas and £500 summer. that way it's not that far from something to look forward to, it's less of a tax hit all at one time, and people tend to like something in the summer to pay for holidays etc.

NuffSaidSam · 19/11/2023 17:28

willWillSmithsmith · 19/11/2023 17:09

I’d still rather have the money 😁

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Fair enough!

I guess I'm emotionally needy 😂

Blondeshavemorefun · 19/11/2023 17:35

I'm sure no one if being totally honest would turn down - if their boss said here's £500 cash or you can have a card with thanks

Obv nice to have both

Lorralorr · 19/11/2023 17:42

Namechange4234 · 17/11/2023 06:30

Why do nannies get so much at Christmas? I don't understand!

Because rich people have nannies!

MokaEfti · 19/11/2023 17:51

HerkyBaby · 17/11/2023 07:23

I’m quite sure you can afford the £500. Imagine yours and the children’s life without her . This needs to be viewed as an annual retainer and please don’t leave us for a family that pays higher wages/ bonuses, travels extensively and provides a better car for the nanny. Just pay the £500 and thank your lucky stars that you have a decent nanny that you and the children love.

This! A million times!

jesshomeEd · 19/11/2023 17:54

I'd definitely give a cash bonus, £100 if you can't afford £500.

The industry norm for nannies is a Christmas cash bonus. If you are in London then a week's wage is pretty typical.

ManchesterLu · 19/11/2023 17:58

I'd give a nice gift voucher for a shop you know she likes.