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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

A parking one, felt threatened.

121 replies

ParkingAgain · 11/11/2023 19:18

Apologies for the length
Years ago our street was made a clearway so no on street parking. The houses were awarded residents parking on various nominated nearby streets. We also have room for one car on our driveway.

We have a small manual car that our children share and use for learning to drive etc. that we park on a nearby street with a residence disk on display.
For various reasons the kids haven’t used the car for about 6 weeks so it hasn’t moved.

Today a rather irate man arrived at my door. I recognized him as a Dad of a kid in one of my kids activities about 10 years ago so I said hello.

He was firstly annoyed that my doorbell didn’t work. But then told me I needed to move the car as it was parked between two spaces. I was genuinely confused because there are no individually marked out spaces on the street. Both left and right side are both marked as one long continuous parking area.
I said this to him and he said there was a half car space either side of mine but this is just the way other cars happen to have parked after me.
He then said he knew the car was registered to my daughter who is studying abroad this term therefore it is abandoned and needed to be moved.
He added that he was fed up of coming home and having to park up the street and to park outside someone else’s house.

But what upset me was he kept saying “ I am asking you this nicely” I felt it was being said in a threatening way.

I just said I would think about it and closed the door.

My phone immediately buzzed with a text from a neighbour about a man acting suspiciously at our house and was everything ok?

Anyway spoke to neighbour after he left and decided to say it to police because I felt threatened.

Police said because the threats were not explicit it wasn’t an offence but they would call around and speak to him.

I am now worried that I over reacted. I could just have moved the car. I have moved it other times when people have asked me to if they are getting a delivery or something and want the space outside their house clear. I always move straight away.
I am also worried that I will have antagonised him and made it worse.
Car isn’t actually outside his house but it close but neighbour I spoke to said she thinks he has multiple cars so needs more than just the space outside his house.

Was I being unreasonable?

And yes I will add a diagram.

OP posts:
Lovingitallnow · 11/11/2023 19:20

What did you think he was going to do?

AlphaB3tty · 11/11/2023 19:31

You're not being unreasonable. Just ignore the bloke.
I'd move back or forth about 6inches. Then you can say you moved it.
It's not worth worrying over unless he becomes more of an issue.

QuantumMottle · 11/11/2023 19:32

If it's going to be parked on the street long-term, it would be neighbourly to move it once a week at least. I'm sorry he seemed threatening to you though, you don't need that.

PuttingDownRoots · 11/11/2023 19:34

Drive the car occasionally... it will do it good. Then park elsewhere on returning.

Girlsjustwannahavefundamentalrights · 11/11/2023 19:35

So you now know your car is taking up too much space, go move it. He's probably had 6 weeks of struggling to park around a car belonging to someone who lives on a different street, that's not even moved in 6 weeks and that is taking up 2 valuable parking spaces. I can't believe you wasted police time on someone just asking you to move your car.

Just move the car.

olympicsrock · 11/11/2023 19:40

He does sound like he was unnecessarily aggressive. Clearly people park in a certain place meaning that even though your car was there first is takes two spaces.
You did perhaps overreact a bit given that this was a first contact and could have prevented this by moving the car every few weeks so as not to inconvenience the same person / people all the time.

RunningFromInsanity · 11/11/2023 19:51

YWBU to call the police

ParkingAgain · 11/11/2023 19:54

Apologies for the poor image.

What did I think he would do? Damage the car.

It’s not taking up two spaces. Lots of people who park there have various size cars and vans so sometimes when you park you are tight between a car and large van but when you come back the van has been replaced by a car so there is some space. It’s not consistent.

I might move it up a half space but there is no guarantee that it will stay that way depending on who moves their car around me.

A parking one, felt threatened.
OP posts:
Yourebeingtooloud · 11/11/2023 19:55

It sounds like he was a bit grumpy about it but he’s probably been getting slowly more irritated for 6 weeks. Calling the police was way ott. If you’d normally move it if asked, I don’t know why you wouldn’t move it now.

ParkingAgain · 11/11/2023 19:59

Police station is closer to my house than my car is so I popped in and said it at the desk because I was very shaken.

OP posts:
frenchfries111 · 11/11/2023 20:00

Where I park there is space for about 5/6 cars. Some people come and park with awkward gaps to you can only get 3 cars on there.
i could move my car along so another car could get in, or I could leave it and expect the people who park next to me to do it properly in the first place. It’s not your problem to keep moving your car to fill in gaps.

Poppyseed14 · 11/11/2023 20:01

I don't think you were unreasonable to be annoyed and taken aback by him but calling the police was not how most people would deal with this situation.

TamzinGrey · 11/11/2023 20:09

If I had a car stuck in front of my house without moving for 6 weeks when parking places were scarce I'd be annoyed too. Can't believe that you complained to the police. YABU.

Lavenderhazee · 11/11/2023 20:12

You're entitled to park there so YWNBU for that but calling the police was OTT in my opinion.

EsmeSusanOgg · 11/11/2023 20:13

We have a neighbour who parks their small car taking up two spaces as you describe on a busy street. It is super annoying. Just move the car occasionally to ensure you are not hogging more than one space.

DodgyDiagram · 11/11/2023 20:14

YANBU, but if I was you I’d wait until a quiet day and then move it to the end of the row and park right up to the line so that it’s 100% definitely not taking up more space than it needs to.

PictureOfFlorianTray · 11/11/2023 20:14

I must admit that if a car was parked outside my house and hadn't been moved for months, I'd be complaining, sorry.

Sirzy · 11/11/2023 20:14

Personally I would park the car that isn’t being used on your drive

Zingy123 · 11/11/2023 20:14

Legally you have done nothing wrong. However I would be furious to have a car badly parked outside my house for 6 weeks. You should be more considerate.

Thedm · 11/11/2023 20:16

You went to the police? Grow up.

Greenshake · 11/11/2023 20:18

You involved the Police in this? Seriously?

creativegoblin · 11/11/2023 20:18

Erm ... you went to the Police ?! In the words of mumsnet, are you on glue? Give your head wobble .

Canyoudigityesyoucan · 11/11/2023 20:20

It is irritating when you’re trying to park your car and the spaces left aren’t big enough for you. Especially when parking is scarce.

I would have probably moved my car to the end of the parking row so your back wheels perhaps are to the back of the parking box if you knew it would be left unattended for a while. BUT I wouldn’t have done it after the guy was so rude and would have probably left it for a few days to piss him off

orangeicelollies · 11/11/2023 20:23

Although it's understandably quite annoying for him to see one car in a space big enough for two cars, he should have asked nicely. "Would you mind moving it along a bit please?" would have got the result he wanted straight away.

What would he have said if a massive bloke had opened the door? I've got a neighbour like this, happy to talk to women like shit but won't answer the door to their husbands.

Flavabobble · 11/11/2023 20:24

Leaving it parked up, unmoved, in someone's street for over a month is taking the piss. And I'm not overly concerned with where people park.

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