A parking one, felt threatened.

[ParkingAgain]

Apologies for the length
Years ago our street was made a clearway so no on street parking. The houses were awarded residents parking on various nominated nearby streets. We also have room for one car on our driveway.

We have a small manual car that our children share and use for learning to drive etc. that we park on a nearby street with a residence disk on display.
For various reasons the kids haven’t used the car for about 6 weeks so it hasn’t moved.

Today a rather irate man arrived at my door. I recognized him as a Dad of a kid in one of my kids activities about 10 years ago so I said hello.

He was firstly annoyed that my doorbell didn’t work. But then told me I needed to move the car as it was parked between two spaces. I was genuinely confused because there are no individually marked out spaces on the street. Both left and right side are both marked as one long continuous parking area.
I said this to him and he said there was a half car space either side of mine but this is just the way other cars happen to have parked after me.
He then said he knew the car was registered to my daughter who is studying abroad this term therefore it is abandoned and needed to be moved.
He added that he was fed up of coming home and having to park up the street and to park outside someone else’s house.

But what upset me was he kept saying “ I am asking you this nicely” I felt it was being said in a threatening way.

I just said I would think about it and closed the door.

My phone immediately buzzed with a text from a neighbour about a man acting suspiciously at our house and was everything ok?

Anyway spoke to neighbour after he left and decided to say it to police because I felt threatened.

Police said because the threats were not explicit it wasn’t an offence but they would call around and speak to him.

I am now worried that I over reacted. I could just have moved the car. I have moved it other times when people have asked me to if they are getting a delivery or something and want the space outside their house clear. I always move straight away.
I am also worried that I will have antagonised him and made it worse.
Car isn’t actually outside his house but it close but neighbour I spoke to said she thinks he has multiple cars so needs more than just the space outside his house.

Was I being unreasonable?

And yes I will add a diagram.

What makes his need greater than the OPs?

If it was a different car that had parked that day then you may actually be able to as it could park leaving a space free, not across two spaces.

I didn't say his need was greater did I? It just doesn't take much to move a car that isn't being used daily a little bit down the road to make life easier for people does it? Since when was doing something small that took little time and didn't require any great investment seen as a great hindrance? Sad and selfish.

If i owned two cars, I would have moved it

Well if it is legally parked there, taxed and parking permit valid, there's fuck all you can do or say about it. Irrespective of if you'd find it annoying.

Nothing to do with need he’s not asking for her to surrender her space so he can have it

he’s asking for it to be parked better so 2 cars can park rather than 1 car taking 2 spaces

Six weeks? YABU. Move it onto your drive, if the battery still works.

You really do need to be moving and driving that car at least every other week to keep it in working order. Drive it and park it elsewhere. Move it about regularly.

I can understand grumpy man’s frustration to be honest. A car has pretty much been dumped there and makes parking for residents of the street harder. Doesn’t mean it’s ok for him to be aggressive though.

It doesn't have to be outside his home for it to be a PITA when a car is taking up 2 spaces for weeks on end.

All the posters bleating on about "oooh, it's taxed/MOTed/legally parked should consider that just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.

The car is causing a problem now other cars around it have moved. just go and shift it

I live in a terraced street with unmarked (and also no need for a permit). If I come home late I usually have to park away from my house - either further along the street or in a neighbouring street. I always go and nice it nearer to my house as soon as I can because I feel slightly guilty that it's preventing someone else from parking near their house. Something like a skip which doesn't move for weeks is annoying but can't be helped. A car can be helped. You can't park it near your house, no, but you could move it about a bit or park further away where parking isn't so much of an issue.

Why not just take it out for the weekly shop once a week then move it to a different space?

Get the police to have a word with him. It is not acceptable for men to intimidate women. I bet he would not have been like that if the car was a mans. Regardless you should not let the car sit for 6 weeks. It needs a 10 minute drive at least once a week but ideally twice in the winter.

I would be a bit annoyed with a car parked for 6 weeks in the same place. Probably not enough to merit saying anything though.

I'd be annoyed with a car parked for 6 weeks without moving, but I don't think I'd find and accost the owner over it. You should probably take it out a wee drive every now and then to keep the car right.
You can fit 7 cars in the spaces outside my house, I'd reckon on a good day there's about 4 parked, because no bugger around here can park, so I get the frustration about cars taking up several spaces and having to park elsewhere, but again, not enough to accost the owner about it.
I think reporting to the police was an overreaction, but they won't do anything anyway, someone put a brick through my rear windscreen in the summer and the police didn't even bother contacting me back about it.

But it’s not taking up two spaces, the OP wrote:
It’s not taking up two spaces. Lots of people who park there have various size cars and vans so sometimes when you park you are tight between a car and large van but when you come back the van has been replaced by a car so there is some space. It’s not consistent.

I might move it up a half space but there is no guarantee that it will stay that way depending on who moves their car around me.

If she moves it this time then they will expect it all the time. She’s parked lawfully. Every street has someone who thinks it’s their job to police the parking. Who made him the parking monitor? Would everyone be calling the OP selfish if she couldn’t move the car for 6 weeks because of an illness or operation? It’s irrelevant why the car is there, who drives it or when it’s going to be moving. It’s parked legitimately.

The first post says there was a half car space each end. The OP nay jot have initially parked it like that but with it not moving and other cars moving around it, it was then taking up two spaces. Half and half equals an extra space.

I would hate to not be able to park outside my own home because others from another street are parked there.

one Of the reasons we bought a house with a drive !

yabu to leave the car on a congested street for weeks on end

Why is he complaining about a car that isn't in front of his own home, even? I am guessing that the actual property owner where car is parked got fed up but is afraid of confrontations & OP.

So op goes and moves the car, it’s still going to be parked in the same street as that’s where the permit is for - as ops own street is a clear way. So she puts the car in a different spot - how is that any different?

car ownership by your logic is selfish, having an SUV would be selfish as it takes two spaces, parking anywhere but a car park.

Ok so she moves the car and during the week the other vehicles come and go placing the OPs vehicle in the position where again it appears to be parked badly. She can’t win which is why I would have said in the first instance to the neighbour that I m not insured to drive it and he’s going to have to wait until my daughter returns which is plausible.

I moved the car.

When I went to move it the cars near it had changed so there were no longer any half spaces empty near it.
Its outside a different house now.

I will try to remember to drive it occasionally for the cars benefit not for the angry man’s.

2 separate issues - the parking and the speaking to the Police.

1. The Parking - there is a difference between what you are legally allowed to do and what is neighbourly and considerate. Yes, it’s a road that you have a permit for, so you can legally park there. Leaving a car in one space for 6 weeks without moving it, when there is pressure on parking is un-neighbourly and selfish. I would move the car every few days. Fine to keep parking it in the road with the permits, but leaving it outside the same persons house for weeks on end so they can never park outside to unload shopping, small kids etc….selfish.
2. Speaking to the Police - sounds unnecessary. The man spoke to you and asked you to one. He might have been a bit annoyed but that’s not the same as threatening. He wasn’t wrong to speak to you about the issue.

These are issues about being reasonable and living in a community where you all have to park where parking is limited and based on permits. Being considerate is really important. That means not leaving a car for weeks in end that never moves outside someone else’s house. It is okay to speak to neighbours about issues that are making your life difficult. It is not okay to threaten, but it is okay to express frustration in a non-aggressive way. In life we cannot expect to never have someone speak to us and express frustration or annoyance or disappo8ntment about something we’ve done. We have to understand it’s normal and be able to cope with it. Wanting to report anything we haven’t enjoyed or found comfortable is just daft and suggests an unusually low level of resilience and perspective.

I think really OP knows reporting to the Police was OTT. I know the event has passed, but if you over-react,nit is possible to return to the Police and say that on reflection you over-reacted and don’t want further action taken. Better to do that and feel a bit foolish than to avoid losing face and let the issue with the neighbour escalate.