Slow clueless people holding up queues

[AuntyMargeAuntyFlora]

What is it with these people?

My latest experience was at a walk-in centre. Only two women ahead of me in the queue to book in. Goodness knows what they were doing, most of it seemed to be standing there looking at each other before saying a few quiet words to the receptionist who had to keep explaining the same things to them (that they had missed their appointment and needed to go immediately to another hospital if they wanted to see x department). Then they'd stare at each other again. Occasionally one would half-heartedly search in a bag or look at their phone. Absolutely no sense of urgency at all, and apparently oblivious (despite glancing in our direction several times) to the massive queue gradually building up behind them. By the time the queue had almost reached the door, another member of staff was called to come and help book everyone else in, and these two women were still slowly doing nothing.

I don't mind if someone has genuinely got a difficult query/situation that takes ages to unpick, or if they are perhaps elderly/overwhelmed/etc and these things take longer. But its usually these people who are first to apologise for holding up the queue or even suggest others go ahead!

What I'm talking about is the entitled people who don't seem to register that other people exist, and who ponder and confer at a snail's pace, oblivious to any sense of urgency of the queue building up. I can imagine someone coming in with a serious injury, and these two women glancing over periodically as the person bleeds everywhere and slowly collapses, as they carry on with their inane time wasting non-query...

YANBU with most of these. I've worked in retail- you can usually tell who needs a little time, space and help and who is just plain dozy. It's the plain dozy people that do waste time and do test the patience of others and who are being complained about here, although I do try and stay patient with queues at the GP etc as there obviously lots or reasons why people may take some time or need help - and our receptionists are pretty good at keeping things moving.

in terms of danger, people who stop dead in train door ways, the ends of escalators etc are both annoying and a bit dangerous. I tend to be a little more forgiving of driving hesitancy at roundabouts after seeing some people signal or position themselves for one thing and do something else entirely!

Retirees can obviously do as they please but I do take objection to those that do then choose to come at what common sense must tell you is a busy time and complain about it. My friends mum is a pensioner and she called another older lady out on this. She'd popped into M&S for milk around 1pm on her way home from an appointment & was happily waiting her turn, when she saw the other lady with a full trolley complaining that she had no idea why all the YOUNG people insisted on coming out at this time- it was ridiculous how busy it always was. Friends mum sharply and loudly asked how oblivious one had to be to shop in office lunch hours when you clearly had lots of free time and then complain about people clearly using their only free time.

Similarly whilst I do appreciate that some people may have their only real interaction of the day with a cashier- read the room. If its 12:45 and there's a huge queue behind you, it is staggeringly self absorbed and selfish to keep inanely talking at the cashier. I had to wait ages behind someone in Boots a few years ago because of this. She'd finished their transaction and wouldn't shut up. Her daughter tried to shuffle her along. The cashier tried to wrap it up. She said goodbye and then started all over again. Her daughter eventually said "mum, there's a queue!" and she gave a tinkly, mumsnetty laugh and finally left. No apologies to anyone. This was a busy town centre around lunch time and this woman was wasting my very precious free time- in which I also had yet to eat, before I had to go back to my own shop and deal with other thoughtless clots just like her. I was in the management team so worked pre open & post close so lunch was my only real chance to go to a lot of other shops.

Personally my beef is with judgemental idiots who complain about the queue rather than the lack of staffing provision or poor building layout or expect everyone to be an expert at navigating the transport they use daily themselves.

One day you too will be the distressed patient at the walk in centre struggling to focus on some of the answers, the lonely person whose main human contact is in shops and services or the confused visitor who doesn't know the protocol on the local transport system. You may also develop a disability which makes all or any of these things more difficult.

Well @MrsToothyBitch, lets hope the ‘thoughtless clots’ don’t shop at the shop you work at. Or, asbpart of the management team, maybe you could train staff to deal with those customers in an empathetic, considerate manner.

You snooze you lose.

Thats me every time.

Me too! As it is because I work from home most of the time I can nip into town early morning or late afternoon when it's quiet.

I accept that there's a few occasions in the week as a f/t working lone parent where you need to get somewhere fast, and very slow plodders can be irritating.

That's on you though, they can't all just pull over, get out of the queue, stop shopping, stop needing petrol, stop their own lives so you can busily get on past them.

I need to get somewhere a handful of times a week. Nothing is served by huffing and puffing, I now leave very very early indeed for everything as I'm one of the slow ones, and so need to allow more time to park and walk, it's shit, I don't like being disabled but there it is.

Most of the very busy people are not that busy, they have made being busy their entire persona. The very very busy people doing life-changing work are not like this, they are usually quite charming and weirdly manage to make time for other people, their kids and so on. I've noticed this so I don't think it's about being objectively busy.

I say this as someone who injured themselves being 'too busy' and rushing and not taking care, that stopped me being so busy. I basically can't be any more, so that's that.

That was never the system in the UK. The lifts are for those who can't use the stairs or escalators. When security guards used to be about, they'd tell people off for walking up them. How is pushing past people safe? They aren't built in a way that's safe to walk up. In Primark, fair enough they are very wide, but normal escalators aren't. They are there to get people who can't use the stairs up to the next level. Why can't you walk up the stairs if you can walk up the escalator?

Teenagers just don't see you because you are an adult and therefore invisible. And they are often staring at their mobile phone screens although grown adults seem to need to do it too. For goodness sake just put them away when you are walking along!

I agree that parents are a pain in the behind when they don't keep an eye on their kids who have not yet developed spatial awareness.

But the middle aged couples who refuse to let go hands are massively irritating too.

I just keep walking towards all categories of pavement hoggers and if they won't move over I just stop so they are forced to. The bigger issue is if you are coming up behind them and they don't notice you and there is no room to easily get past. I have to hope no cars are coming so I can nip past on the road.

I blame the parents - particularly those who allow their DC to use scooters on a busy pavement

And in shops and shopping centres. In what world is this ok? And then they have the cheek to moan about e-scooters!

@Ponoka7 so how are people complaining on this thread then for people standing on escalators then if its not the system in the UK? Majority of the people do it and unless you are the width of an elephant there is plenty of room for people to pass you on an escalator, keep moving, if not use the lift. Ver rarely there is stairs and escalators its mostly escalators and lifts - Lifts are designed for people who cant walk up the stairs.

When security guards used to be about, they'd tell people off for walking up them. How is pushing past people safe?

It's fine.

The "stand on the right, walk on the left" has been in use on the London Underground for over 150 years. There is no need whatsoever for anyone to push if people read and follow the signs, and don't take up more space than they should.

Because that's what it's all about, isn't it? It's about only taking your fair share, realising your impact on other people (by being unnecessarily slow or taking u too much space, or whatever) and acting considerately.

Exactly.

I live abroad- I had returned back home to see my dad before he died, he had taken a turn for the worse just as I boarded my flight. The smug git who told me to " chill out, I'm not hurrying for anyone " was most offended when I told him, loudly, that my son was waiting outside to take me to my dying father while he farted about blocking the exit . Wanker.

I am not sure how trying to prove said Mumsnetters right is going to help anyone

**
Chanelbasketballandchain

Some people have just too much time on their hands, we get it, they are bored and like to faff. The rest of us have lives and things to do, be slow but at least get out of the flipping way!”

You’ll slow down one day, all of us do, marathon runners, Physics graduates, it comes to us all. You’ll remember what you said one difficult day in years to come (hopefully, if you remain mentally competent). I hope you feel a bit rotten about being so judgemental about other people when you do.

It won't but it'll give me some fun knowing impatient idiots are stewing in the queue behind me.

I hate being in a queue where the queue moves forward and some numpty just stands there leaving a big gap for ages.
The same in traffic jams - you get one car that leaves a big gap and it might not make the biggest difference at the end of the day but it gives me the rage 😂 queuing is not rocket science

Couldn't you have written it down before leaving home?

I agree when the queue actually does come to a complete standstill - just fill up the gap! If you see a queue in the other direction you can often see massive gaps and the queue would be half as long if they were filled in.

But if a queue is slow moving I try to help to keep it moving, rather than rushing up to the car in front and having to come to a complete stop. It doesn't always work as it depends on the speed of the queue.

The people who are paying the retired's pensions and healthcare costs, maybe?

And yes, I know they paid into the system themselves.

Anyway, you are always going to have the odd situation where you end up in a supermarket at lunchtime or some other busy time. But personally I don't like crowds and queues, so will always manage things so I can avoid them!

What has happened to good manners. We could help the confused person. Patience is a virtue we are taught.
Manners maketh the man is a good rule.
What irks me is folk who rush devoid of understanding and compassion. Be patient and less moaning please. The train, bus or train will not leave any sooner.

Maxus · Yesterday 10:52

You have no idea what to as going on with these women. They could have a stroke, dementia or something as long these lines which makes processing information much more difficult. Perhaps next time show consideration instead of assuming they are clueless.

Hmmm...maybe, very rarely - and it's usually clear in some way if this is the case.

But 99% of the time, I honestly don't think so. Some people really are clueless, selfish and entitled.

I was in M & S once, with big queues building up. A woman suddenly decided she didn't like the melon she'd chosen, so asked for it to be changed. Cashier rang for assistance and eventually someone came and went off into the shop to find another melon. To cut a long story short, she had to go 3 times before the woman declared herself happy with the fruit. She showed not one iota of embarrassment at having held up so many people. If you want that kind of service - GO TO FORTNUM AND MASON!

M and S could have handled it more efficiently, sure - but the lady doing the running around obviously didn't realise just how long it would all take!!

It's interesting that you see the people waiting in the queue as "impatient idiots" but don't see those taking a long time as "dithering idiots".

In reality, there will be some situations where one person is being impatient and some where the person really is dithering.

Certainly as someone who already struggles (autism) and who was physically injured, trying to hold it together in pain being made to stand in a queue for someone who has someone else to help them, calling me an "impatient idiot" isn't really on.

I didn't write about the full effect of what happened on my autism (disastrous) as I felt that wasn't really relevant to whether or not these two should have been holding everything up going in circles, but as so many posters are keen to consider hidden disabilities etc of the queue blockers, perhaps it is highly relevant that those being held up might have reasons they can't deal with that too!

The fact that in the only place that does have this custom (the tube) there have to be signs put up advising people of the fact, is very good evidence that it isn't the normal system. Just take the stairs, it'll be better for you.

It's not good manners to hold up a queue of people.
I'd be absolutely happy to help a confused person, but not one who isn't confused and is in fact just refusing to accept they have missed their appointment, or otherwise being entitled.
And the train or bus may well leave sooner without these people holding everything up.

I thought "Stand on the right" was completely routine worldwide for escalators....