Inheritance/Wills/Step families

59 replies

CountryBumpkin02 · 03/11/2023 23:12

I'm married and my DH has 2 adult children, both nice, but we aren't close.
I have no children.
I will eventually inherit my parents property as I am an only child. Dad has already passed :-(
I would sell the house, but obviously then the funds from the sale would go into our joint marital account which is the only one we have. I'm fine with this and sharing with my DH as he has been the main bread winner and has been very generous with his money (some of which was from his parents inheritance). He also has rental properties from his inheritance which will eventually pass to his children, plus his half share of our house will go to them.
My concern is that if I was to pass away, it just doesn't sit right that my parents inheritance would pass to my DH as it would eventually would pass to his adult children.
I just wondered how others had navigated this issue.
Should I open another account - but then does this look awful on my DH?
Any advice appreciated!

OP posts:

TimeForACider · 04/11/2023 11:43

We have a trust will due to it being a second marriage with kids involved. We own the house as tenants in common (i think that’s the term) When the first of us passes, the other has a life time interest in the house. I’m leaving my half and all savings to my son. DH is leaving his half and all savings to his kids. His kids treat me with contempt so I don’t want them having any of my money. You can do something similar I presume, but replace the kids with nieces/nephews/friends/charities.

missskinnylegz · 04/11/2023 11:50

I think it's important to revisit your will every five years. Families change. My kids inherit our estate equally, but bearing in mind we all travel together often in an aeroplane, there's a chance we could be wiped out as a family at the same time. If That happened, there are instructions in my will as to whom I would like my money to go to. This changes from time to time, e.g. friends, distant relatives etc.

orandeyu · 04/11/2023 11:56

I'd just spend it to be honest! Can't take it with you can you? Enjoy the rest of your life!

My dad is a wealthy man, and he's in his 60s now. He's already told my brother and I he wants to spend as much as possible before he dies- and fair play! He's worked bloody hard for it.

OnGoldenPond · 04/11/2023 11:56

@CountryBumpkin02 good to see you are planning to get the wills drawn up and you will be properly provided for. Your OP sounded like your DH was planning to will all his assets directly to his DC without providing for you. I've seen this happen several times with second marriages and the surviving spouse was left in a very precarious position.

That said, you need to get on with it as until then you are subject to insolvency rules which might not work out well for you and creates more expense in sorting out probate.

caringcarer · 04/11/2023 12:04

So if your DH does his half of the house goes straight to his kids so you'd have to move out your home immediately. He could leave you a life time interest so you can continue to live there and his kids inherit after you die. If you want to leave a portion of your inheritance to DC in your family you can do that. Just make a will. Maybe leave half to your DH and half to DC in your family.

jlpth · 04/11/2023 14:08

Surely your mum can see that you have no children and that anything she leaves you is likely to end up going to your dh or dsc? So if she wants to prevent that and leave more to other family members, she can do that in her own will can’t she?

other than that, I am a bit confused as to why you would prefer to leave money to charity than your husband’s children.

wesurecouldstandgladioli · 04/11/2023 14:11

I would also give to my nieces and nephews and cousins rather than DSC, as you’re not close. Sounds like DSC will be sorted.

Purpleturtle45 · 05/11/2023 08:37

TheOneWhereWeDontGiveAPhuck · 03/11/2023 23:41

This is an odd way of thinking. He has been the breadwinner and clearly spent a lot more money than you have during the marriage, which might otherwise have been inheritance for his kids.

This

SpongeBob2022 · 05/11/2023 08:52

I actually think that he is in a more difficult position than you are to be honest. If he died then unless he has proper provision in place there is a risk for him that you would get everything and then decide to cut out his children completely in your own will at a later date. I suspect it is more complicated than this (I'm no expert) but the gist of it can happen as I've seen it.

I know you won't do this, plus he is putting things in place, I'm just making the point that his situation is actually more precarious than yours.

You could get your Mum's opinion if you wanted to....

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