Throwing up in public

[highlandelk]

I was unwell on holiday recently, food poisoning.

I was in a tourist attraction and suddenly felt very sick. It came on very quickly/ unexpectedly, and there was no time to get to a loo. I simply had to turn to face the nearest wall/ corner and just throw up. It was horrible and embarrassing, as there was a queue of people nearby waiting to get into something.

The people just watched me, some looked awkward, some looked disgusted. No one offered a kind word or asked if I was OK, they just stared. I found myself apologising to them and then I just went outside feeling awful and trying to clean myself up.

AIBU to think someone could have asked if I was OK? I was on my own.

Tbh it was just that the stares of disgust made me feel awful. Just a kind 'are you OK?' from one person would have been appreciated, even if there's nothing people can really do. I felt disgusting and embarrassed.

What a caring and compassionate view!

So, when you told the staff, did you offer to use their equipment to clean it up? Or have you left some poor member of staff to have to deal with your vomit?
Cleaning general dirt and rubbish is one thing, having to clean up someone elses bodily fluids or waste from either end is just grim and unfair.

You see I would hate people asking if I was “ok” and would expect disgust because vomit IS disgusting. I don’t think they think you are disgusting just the situation.

Honestly I think you just need to accept a yucky thing happened to you but you are in no way to blame (unless you caused it by getting unspeakably drunk or something).

I've a friend who is a regular Florence Nightingale who will leap in to help anyone at any time. We were on a day out recently and a chap hurled in the street near us, she rushed over to help and he turned and projectile vomited all over her. Bless her soul she still checked on him and gave him her water, while wearing his last meal.

I'm not as pure a soul as her and vomit gives me the heebie-jeebies, so I'm afraid on that basis I'd probably not have done anything either, though I hope I wouldn't have stood and stared at you in disgust. To be honest the times I have seen people puke in the street I've just assumed they were drunk and let them crack on. I imagine that's where most people's minds went too.

I would expect not because she was probably feeling awful. When I get stomach bug I just about manage to make the journey between my bed and the bathroom. Anything strenuous like cleaning would probably make me feel dizzy and physically sick again.

I voted YABU because I don’t think they were necessarily being rude.
I think they probably just didn’t want to draw more attention to you.

I’ve seen people be sick from drinking and I think I usually pretend not to notice, if it’s just once.

If they keep being sick then I’ll go over and ask them if they need help but there’s nothing I can actually do and I risk making them feel more embarrassed.

Also for me, sick is something I struggle with.
I used to work with SN kids and I could cope with most things apart from sick as it triggers my gag reflex and makes me sick.
So these people trying to help may have ended up being sick themselves.

I’m sorry you went through this though as it’s not nice for you, especially when you’re on your own.

OP, could have been worse. Have shit myself in public several times. I would rather vomit against a wall and be able to get away quickly!

We are human, we cant help these things.

I would rather that nobody helped me unless I was half dead! I prefer to be left alone if I am sick, especially in public.

If someone throws up but looks otherwise ok I’d leave them to it to be honest and assume bug/morning sickness/too much booze. If you were wobbling or fainting or looked seriously ill I’d check more.

A few years ago I was suddenly struck with extreme pain (turned out to be kidney stones) and I was being sick about every 15 minutes.

I ended up puking in the street, in so much pain I couldn't stand up, so I was actually lying down puking into the gutter and some ABSOLUTE LEGEND came out and gave me some tissues and water and asked if I needed any help. It was probably the single kindest thing anyone has ever done for me.

Anyway YANBU, it's not the practical help they can actually offer it's the reassurance that during your vulnerability and what is an embarrassing thing for many people someone acknowledged and comforted you.

I think people don't do this for one/more of 3 reasons:

1. It could be contagious: most causes of food poisoning are actually contagious, more often than not it's caused by Norovirus infection that is spread from the chefs hands to the food (but can also be found in Oysters and some other foods) and less often it's caused by bacteria (e-coli, salmonella etc.) Vomit caused by Norovirus actually contains millions of viral particles and you need to be exposed to about 10 to get sick, so being near it, is likely to make someone sick. I think there might be some evolutionary basis to avoiding vomit/ing.
2. It doesn't seem life or death: if you had fainted or had a seizure (even if you'd vomited at the same time) then it's much more likely that people would help.
3. Some people like myself (it's not uncommon) are emeto-phobic and absolutely terrified of people vomiting. It would actually ruin my holiday seeing someone vomit because I'd be so scared of myself or family members catching it. I'd have to go back to the hotel and shower etc. Obviously this is an extreme reaction but it's one of the most common phobias.

Well, OP was ill, it's not fair to judge her on not cleaning up. Have a heart, she's not being deliberately awful to the staff.

I would have been one looking disgusted because it's vomit and that repels me more than anything, but it wouldn't have been disgust at the ill person, just the puke. I'd probably have offered you a bottle of water if I had one though. It can't always be avoided so it's harsh to judge, especially as most people really wouldn't have wanted to be sick in public (or at all, but in public is worse).

No, I’d give anyone vomiting a wide berth, but I have a phobia of vomit. I don’t expect anyone to come to me when I’m vomiting. I’d rather deal with it alone.

I'm so sorry. I would of asked if you were okay. Some people are just so rude and have no compassion or empathy x

That's so gross

This is interesting OP.

I had hyperemesis gravidarum and despite being medicated I threw up every single fucking day bar 2 between weeks 5 and 42. Unfortunately I vomited in public several times (thank God for open bins though!). For several reasons I found myself in three different countries throughout the pregnancy and strangers' reactions were very different:

Country A: people stopped and tried to help with genuine concern and compassion. Gave me water, offered to walk me home, asked if I needed an ambulance!
Country B: people criticising me openly and assuming I was drunk.
Country C (UK): I was completely ignored

Ironically that pregnancy produced a child that is emetophobic - emetophobia is not uncommon and might be another reason why people steered clear.

Not a chance I would have wanted any “kind words” and “are you ok?” Had I been on your shoes OP

and so not a chance I would have done the same to you

If inside I would have asked for cleaning equipment and cleaned it up. No way would I have left it for a cleaner, likely on minimum wage. Outside I'd have asked for a bucket to swill it away. Bodily fluids are a health hazard and should be sorted out.

You're a Dr??

I feel for you. I was sick all day and night for my entire pregnancy and was sick in public multiple times. Not once did anyone stop and offer any help.

I'd be horrified if anyone even approached me in that situation. The kindest thing you can do is ignore. And the disgust reflex exists for a purpose i.e. to prevent people getting infected by contact with other people's vomit, which does carry germs.

No, I would have ran a mile. I have a vomit phobia and that would have really triggered me seeing that.
If it were me though I would have asked staff for cleaning stuff, I definitely would not have walked away from a pile of vomit like that and just expected someone else to clean up no matter how bad I felt.

The absolute last thing I would want would be strangers approaching to fuss over me. It’s happened to me with food poisoning, rush hour commute in central London and had to throw up in the gutter. It was embarrassing enough and best that I could just pretend to myself that several hundred people didn’t see. And no, I wouldn’t go near a vomming stranger, unless they then keeled over unconscious and I could do something like phone for an ambulance.

Yuck! Wouldn't you carry sea sickness bags with you everywhere in those circumstances? Someone has to empty those open bins. Foul.