To think he's taking the piss?

[Whatonearthhhhhh]

Hi all
We have converted part of our house into an Airbnb and are having an issue with a guest currently.

Our bedroom is directly above the living room of the Airbnb so we can hear the guests usually but have never bothered by any sound in the 3 years it has been running. Everyone who has stayed have been quiet professionals. We now have an 18 year old boy staying who is doing a training course nearby for a month. He has been here for 4 days.

Last night around 9pm, two other cars showed up at the house and two girls went into the Airbnb. I asked what was happening and he said they were revising as they have a test tomorrow. He then later told me that the girls would be staying over. I wasn't happy with this as it's a rental for a single person with only one bed, but I said it was ok for one night. He is openly gay so I wasn't worried about them sharing a bed. He has only just arrived and he is 18 after all so I don't want to be a complete party pooper. The Airbnb agreement specifies no more than one overnight guest at a time so I thought I was being nice. I did ask if they could keep noise to a minimum after 11pm though as DP and I have to be up very early. He sent a very long, apologetic text and was adamant they'd be asleep by 11pm with zero noise.

At Midnight, I was woken up by loud laughing and talking etc so I sent him a text to ask him to be quiet. My text read: 'Hi XXX, you agreed that there would be no noise after 11pm but I have just been woken up, please can you keep it down?'

They then all jumped in their cars about 12:30 and woke me up again, slamming doors and laughing etc on the drive. He still isn't back.

This morning, he posted on my local Facebook page asking about what other rentals available even though he is booked with us for a month! A friend of his commented asking why he needs a rental and this is what he commented back: 'my airbnb host wasn't happy I was revising so instead of actually getting it done I got kicked out and had to waste my time finding somewhere else to revise.'

He also updated his profile picture to one of him holding a glass of wine in hand, posing in the Airbnb, wearing the same outfit as yesterday so it was clearly taken on the supposed 'revision night'

I'm feeling a bit miffed really, I thought I was being nice letting him have the girls stay.

Essentially he's invited some mates over for a few drinks, lied to me that they're just revising so I would think it's a quiet night and let them stay over. Then completely disregarded me asking him to be quiet. Now he's making up lies on social media?

Am I being old and petty? This doesn't really sit right with me. Why is he lying on social media about the situation and just not respecting that he needs to be quiet after 11pm on a weeknight. So publicly as well in a small Facebook group. There really aren't that many airbnbs around here and ours is quite well known.

How do I handle this? I would love to say something because he seems to be taking the piss but at the same time don't want to lose the money he has paid.

Any thoughts?

Honestly, you sound hard work. He can't revise with friends and have a drink? You set a rule of one guest and immediately broke your own rule and then got cross about noise. Speaking to him/sending texts multiple times in one evening just seems ridiculous. Is a living space under your bedroom really that practical?

Reply to his Facebook post setting everything strap. Can you refund him and end the month's booking early?

I agree with this.

You aren't his mother.

I assume he's paid upfront?

Just leave him alone? He's not your child.

I'm not surprised he wants to find a new Airbnb to be honest, you sound like his mother with the constant checking up on him, demanding to know who he has there as well as the texting and facebook stalking. It's probably a good thing he is looking for a new airbnb as I don't think its a good fit for the both of you.

If the airbnb is so close to your own living quarters then I think you should make it clear it's professionals only, NO guests, and state no noise after 11pm in advance.

Why were you even asking him “what was happening” because a car came at 9pm?
Why do you even have the thought that you aren’t worried about him with the girls because he’s gay??
Honestly you sound like you shouldn’t be renting this part of your home out.

He is openly gay so I wasn't worried about them sharing a bed.

Because if he wasn't gay it would be worrying otherwise would it?

If you're going to run an air bnb you need to have rules and stick to them. You don't say "no additional guests" then say "ok just this once" then say "actually no I don't want the noise".
It is reasonable for you to not have to put up with noise after 11pm, but the key issue here is, he is clearly not the right sort of guest for your place. This situation was never going to end well, I dread to think the state your place would have been in after a month! Can you not screen your guests with that online platform (I don't use it but I would expect you to be able to screen people before accepting them)? An 18 year old young man was very unlikely to want to go to bed at 11pm and would have been better suited to a hotel.
Also NO young man has girls over at 11pm to "revise" regardless of his orientation.

Wow no wonder he left

Tbh you sound a bit intrusive. I'm not sure what business you have stopping him from sharing a bed with anyone male or female anyway? But I appreciate you don't want to be woken up late in the night if you live in the same house as your guests.

It sounds like you don't want him there for a month. It sounds like he doesn't want to be there for a month. It also sounds like he's actively looking for a new place to stay. So win-win I guess? As long as he's not on social media pointing out the Airbnb is yours specifically then I'm not sure there is anything to do as seemingly the situation will sort itself out when he finds a new place to stay.

He’s paying to stay in your Airbnb. Why are you asking what’s happening when girls show up at 9pm? You’re not his mum. Are you poking your nose in because he’s 18? His age is irrelevant. Stop being so unprofessional as a host

Your behaviour is appalling - poor lad!

I get that its temporary paying visitors in your home, but really its none of your business if he's revising or if he's having a threesome, who visits at 9pm and why... etc.
Stipulate that no noise after 11pm and before 7am before you rent the space out.

18 is an adult by the way, so a man, not a boy.
His age, gender and sexuality are neither relevant nor are they your business

We've recently given up the holiday let business, after 7 years and only due to moving out of the area. The only real problem we had was when we had young lads booked for a long weekend. NEVER AGAIN! After they'd gone we immediately cancelled any further bookings for four people, and decided to stick to couples only, which worked much better. Personally there is no way I'd have taken an 18 year old for a month, as the chances of the place being looked after, are slim to none. Then by breaking your own rule by allowing more than one visitor, you really shot yourself in the foot OP. In your shoes, I'd happily forego the money, give him a refund, and think yourself lucky that you've hopefully escaped without any damage to your let. Otherwise, if he's not happy, it's quite likely that things won't end well, especially if he can't find anywhere else to stay.

You sound like the nosy landlady of an old fashioned B&B. No noise after 11pm and no visitors. It sounds as if he has already decided to leave your premises. Maybe word your advert so that ONLY quiet studious professionals stay, going forward?

What the fuck am I reading? The OP is well within her rights to ask him to keep the fucking noise down!!

An 18 year old lad had a couple of friends over for a few hours on Halloween night, he apologised to your (frankly, intrusive) text and they'd all buggered off by 12.30pm? He sounds like a dream!

Refund him, tell him he needs to leave ASAP and quit snooping on him. His sexuality and profile picture are irrelevant, it's none of your business what he does in his own time. Poor fella.

Here's a story. When I came back from living abroad I was living in a bed and breakfast in County Wexford while I sorted a house out, and when I got the room I noticed a burn mark in the carpet. I told the owner as I was worried he might think I did it, and he told me this: A few years earlier, he had redecorated all the rooms, trying to make them more comfortable for his guests. He put in a brand new carpet, and two weeks later, a guest went out for the day and left her straighteners on, burning the carpet as I had seen.
I asked him what he did about it, as surely he must have been furious.
"Nothing. You've just got to let it go if you run a bed and breakfast," he said.
I'd never before really understood the level of professionalism or mindset you need to do that job well.

Do you see where I'm going with this OP? You sound like you're a bit too attached to your accommodation and need to let go (or only accept a very specific type of guest).

Such an unprofessional host, I’d want to leave if I were him too

So two 18 year old males would be OK if they were a couple?

Airbnb host here
Stick to the rules - people who try and bend them always end up taking the piss. Always.
More importantly, Airbnb insurance is only valid when named guests are staying. Extra randoms in the property invalidate that insurance.

this is why I hate staying anywhere that owners are nearby, leave him alone, or refund.

It would be the same in a hotel though. If someone were noisy after about 11pm and had extra guests in the room when they'd paid for single occupancy - the management would intervene.
If OP allowed overnight guests and there was a fire, an accident, some damage - the insurer would likely not pay out if the terms were broken.
OP may have handled it badly - different people have different views - but there's always a wider context than just "you're not his mother".