Would you agree that this one thing is enough of a reason that shows that this nanny is not for us ?

[sofachai]

I outlined a few things that are important to us when she first started.

Nothing outrageous.

I explained that I don't want to micro manage her and that I want her to be autonomous and make her own schedule of what she'd like to do with the children ( both preschoolers ). But to keep the important things to us in mind.

One of the things is that we really want our children to have fresh air every day and for her to take her out into our large / child friendly garden.

Nanny agreed. However, unless I remind her to it, she doesn't do it. I work from home in my office a lot, so I know when she goes out and when she doesn't. Unless I tell her to please take them out, it does not happen.

I've also reminded her 4 times that I would rather I didn't need to remind her to do it, as it's not my style and I just want her to respect that it's important to us. I've then left her to it, and again, a couple of weeks go by and she doesn't take the children outside.

She's been with us 6 months, but based on this alone, I think she's not the right fit for our family. I've given her many chances to get it right. She takes them out for a day or so and then she stops doing it for a couple of weeks, until I remind her again.

I feel bad about leaving her without a job so I will give her time to find another, but would you agree it's just a bad fit at this point ?

Do the children like her? If this is the only issue I would try and implement something to ensure she does do it.

Get a whiteboard and put daily goals on it and get the kids to mark it off. I did this with my child he was involved setting the goals too as he got older. Go out and play boules, trampoline, hop scotch etc. Learn a new word. Learn a new language. Read a book. Draw a picture. Lego. He loved crossing off the list. I have a whiteboard now for me. Drink less wine. Eat less food. Do more exercise. Nothing crossed off yet as only starting in November 😂

No phone time when working this is a must.

If you do replace her have more specific objectives in place and no phone scrolling.

YANBU, she’s not a good fit and sounds pretty lazy tbh

There's always one. I don't ' watch her '. I can just hear if they're inside or outside.

I'm not a nightmare boss by any means and have given her a lot of chances and have treated her with a lot of respect which I don't think has been reciprocated.

She knew I would be home a lot.

I spent the first 5 years of my career sitting next to my boss, it's not unusual for your boss to be around and see you working. Even if you're a nanny.

Why have you hired a non-driving nanny if there's no public transport and nothing in walking distance?

Do you children not go to any groups or classes?

This nanny might not be right for you but it sounds like you need to be a bit more thoughtful next time you recruit.

I said an hour of outdoor time a day to aim for. But it's ok if it's less when it's cold or raining etc.

My kids also go to nurseries and preschool, so thankfully they're not just at home all the time.

There is a complicated back story. She did drive but doesn't currently.

That would be a goodbye from me.
No outside time, too much tv and messing on her phone. She is getting paid for this!

I had a live in nanny for 11 years.
The same one. We live in a small country town and she doesn't drive.

Every day she would take my Dd out and as school years started she would do all the extra curriculum stuff too.

I would say you have two problems, she now isn't driving which is not convenient for where you live. She's also not complying to your "framework" asks.

Honestly I'd say move on, give her notice. Those are two big issues.

Definitely think you should let this one go. Even a casual childminder I once had worked to a rough schedule which involved an hour in the garden before lunch and nap.

Try one more time and ask for outside play to be at a specific time each day taking into account the DC’s other commitments.

Is she a nanny and not an au pair? It's seems crazy to be paying for a nanny to be staying in with the kids all day long. Whst does she do with them?

What hours does she watch them. Is it for a full working week? Do they go to preschool or anything.

Is there really nothing on locally?

I know it's not great for the kids but you would think staying in every day would be awful for the nanny. I'd be so bored.

They go to nursery most of the week and a couple of days with nanny.

She was full time before and was taking them out to do things too but we changed that to fewer hours ( also as nanny's situation changed, she could do only a couple of days ).

So now the kids are at nursery most of the week and have a couple of days with nanny. So I don't mind so much that they don't go anywhere, as they're out most of the week and weekend. A couple of days at home is ok for them, I just want them to have time in their garden.

Is she a teenager

I would get rid of her for the tv time, I don’t do it and don’t expect paid childcare to do it frequently.

That’s really bad. You’re not asking her to take them on a daily long-distance expedition, just let them into the garden. But she wants to sit fiddling with her phone instead. That isn’t just a preference or a style, it’s laziness.

Is she British / grew up here?

I have European relatives who are revolted by our UK weather and think it unhealthy for children to be in it.

I'm not saying that makes it ok but could be a factor?

I don’t understand why you don’t extend nursery. It would be cheaper and more stimulating for the children. This seems lose-lose.

She's not a good fit for you. It wasn't till we got our 2nd nanny that I realised what our 1st one should have been doing. It was a real eye-opener!

British born and bread.

Yeah that's what I want to do.

She doesn’t sound like the best fit but given the weather it may not be the best time to judge. if they are at nursery and being active for the majority of the week, I’d be less worried about some more relaxed days with the nanny. If it was just her I’d be more strict on enforcing the outside time/ be more likely to give her notice. The lack of driving may make the arrangement hard to work in the long term anyway as once the eldest is at school, there would be a massive benefit having the nanny around to do pick-ups, activities etc.

She sounds lazy to me. I think going out every day to the garden is a very small ask. I'd actually expect her to be taking them out every day...park, soft play, swimming, museums etc. I took my DC out at that age every single day whatever the weather.

I have a lot of experience employing helpers in the home and I'd definitely let her go. You've given her many opportunities to adjust to your request and she hasn't done it.

You maybe should tell her that if she doesn't get them in the garden daily you'll be upping their nursery hours.

you have enough reason to sack her
but if you wanted tp be generous, you could give her an ultimatum/improvement plan- children to be playing outside for at least an hour a day on 4 out of five days (or whatever you want)
set a review date
if met, keep her but with the warning you will review again in 6 weeks