School certificates. Aibu?

[Glorie]

Aibu to feel like this? My DD is in reception and every Friday 3 children receive a certificate. Everyone had received one throughout this term and my DD and 2 others were today. Aibu to feel like they got one because they were last on the list. As in, the others in previous weeks were genuinely chosen and the last 3 were not because there was no others IFYSWIM. Just feel bad for DD as she’s tried so hard and has come on a lot in the 6 weeks since starting.

This is wild! I thought it was a classic "why hasn't my precious darling got star of the week yet" thread but the twist is your child HAS got star of the week. And you are still not happy.
YABVVU

I feel really, really sorry for someone in this scenario but it ain't your daughter. It's her classroom teacher. Sounds like he/she might be in for a bumpy ride.

Thanks everyone for your replies. I wouldn’t say anything about it to her teacher. It was just a thought that was all. Every week DD came out saying she wasn’t chosen. I am very proud of her and told her this.

So are there only 18 children in the class?

@arethereanyleftatall she had parents evening on Tuesday and was all very positive. She only turned 4 a week before school started and lots of her class are turning 5 already. I think took her a bit to settle in but she’s enjoying it now. I know that’s the most important thing.

There is 24 I think, it’s been a 6 week term, our half term starts Monday

I don't think she's any less deserving because she was one of the last.

My DD was always one of the last to get a certificate, every year. We knew why; they had to make sure everyone got one, so the moment Silly Billy behaved, that was his week. DD could be relied upon to produce some good work and behave well every week, so she could safely be left until last, because there would always be some reason they could give.

Not that odd, surely? There are only 10 in my DD's year group (they do the certs by year group not class), and the whole class ranges from about 17 to 22 (depending which year group they're twinned with).

Glorie You were looking forward to her certificate, to see what she'd been rewarded for and being the last has taken the edge of it because she had to have it that week. However I'm really surprised others haven't mentioned, because it's a really common complaint on Mumsnet, that it's often well behaved, fly under the radar children that get left to the last. My two quickly realised that the children with poorer behaviour, got more certificates and stickers. Obviously as an incentive to keep some children on the right track which is fair enough. So, maybe your DD didn't get her certificate just because she was last on the list but she was last on the list because she's a pleasure to teach!

This might sound like an odd explanation, but I think it could well be that your DD is reliably doing well, behaving and putting in effort and that is why she has been left until last. Some children will be struggling at school and they will have had a certificate in the week when they have done something exceptional for them, as part of the "catch them doing something good and praise them" principle.

My DD1 was an absolute golden child at school, but she used to get her star of the week certificate quite randomly. It was either because no one else had done something that stood out that week or because the teacher was ill or out doing training, so just guessed that DD1 had been good all week. It used to annoy DD1 because everyone else would have something specific as a reason for their star of the week certificate, but hers would be "excellent role model" or similar, when she had just been the same, reliable, capable child week after week. I did try to explain to DD1 that there wasn't much they could praise her for as she always consistently put in effort and fully engaged with lessons and she didn't find doing so difficult.

Apologies Ianthanum had already said it. Teachers try and catch the more challenging children being good and reward them. Your DD could well be doing all the right things so ended up, with one of the last certificates.

Still doesn't add up. So either everyone didn't get one and your DD was among the last, or other kids got completely left out this half term and might first on the list in the next one.

Also, some teachers leave the really good kids for last as they know they could give awards to them every single week, whereas with the trickier (behaviourally,academically or socially) children they have to catch them being good or reward a specific achievement.

You're overthinking this and placing waaaay too much importance on it.

Brilliant.

I'll add two...

AIBU that I can't take my two year old to watch every nativity play. How can I possibly get childcare I've never heard of babysitters, and don't have any friends and my husband is a man
AIBU that someone else brought their two year old and he screamed throughout my pfbs line.
AIBU that the PTA mum brought her two year old, whilst she simultaneously sorted the cake stall and thus couldn't watch her child. She should obviously pay for childcare and stop being cliquey able to make friends

Firstly, someone has to be last so why shouldn’t it be your kid once in a while?

Secondly, this is a reception class and the certificates mean absolutely nothing. They’re just to make the kids feel grown up. You’re massively overthinking this. It’s not like this is her A levels.

This is the exact reason why I am trying to convince my 18 year old, who has just started Uni, not to go into teaching.

FFS parents will complain about anything and some just want to make teachers lives a bloody misery. They do an amazing job and have to put up with this type of precious shit day in, day out.