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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dog annoying us in restaurant

326 replies

Onthegreeen · 27/10/2023 14:17

I was in a restaurant with a friend this morning. A dog at the next table kept wandering over around our table, putting his head onto our laps, swishing his tail against us etc.
We asked the owner if she could keep him at her own table at which point she said it was a dog friendly cafe and he was entitled to be there.
So were we, but we weren't entitled to wander around other tables annoying people. Children are welcome in the cafe but they're not entitled to go up and sit on some random customer's lap.

We couldn't be bothered getting into an argument so we just left. But AIBU to think she was bloody rude and self entitled.

OP posts:
Riola · 27/10/2023 16:25

SadnessIs · 27/10/2023 16:21

Went to one recently , most dogs on leads and very well behaved then one came in and as soon as saw our dc was barking and pulling in its lead to get to them. Settled for a bit and then when my ds (who has asd and Tourette’s) was making some noises the dog went absolutely mental again. By that point it was off lead and had been sitting quietly but ran over and starting growling at my youngest dc then ds got agitated and more noisy and the dog was really growling at him and the owners were sitting there doing nothing I had to say ‘get your dog now and put it on a lead !’ They huffed and puffed and said ‘he’s not keen on noisy children’ I said well don’t take him to a fucking cafe on a busy afternoon then

What a horrible experience for your child. Did they put it on a lead in the end? and did any staff intervene or apologise?

I feel if a business chooses to allow dogs they must take reasonable care to monitor things and get involved if a dog is acting aggressively or bothering people.

I’d provide some ‘feedback’ to the manager.

AnneValentine · 27/10/2023 16:26

I have taken to firmly stating “if your dog touches me again I’m going to assume it’s out of your control and hit it”.

Not once has that resulted in anything other than the dog being kept well away from me.

Dog owners who have that level of entitlement are beyond reason so make your position clear. They let down dog owners who have well trained and behaved dogs.

TooBusyGazingAtStarss · 27/10/2023 16:27

RallyRallyAppreciateIt · 27/10/2023 14:24

I hate the new breed of dog owners.
Theres a whole lot who expect you to be thrilled when their dog bounds over to you, jumps its muddy paws all over you, hassles your dog and has no recall. They then shout at you and give you abuse if you dare to ask them to keep their dog under control.

I hope you leave a review so others know the cafe don’t ask that owners keep dogs under control.

Its the same with their kids 🤣

oakleaffy · 27/10/2023 16:28

So many badly trained ( untrained) dogs about these days
More dog attacks than ever before as well.
Most people are clearly not capable of managing their dogs.
I have a dog, but one I can manage easily.
People get working Cockers, Border collies when they live in a city and go to local park for 20 mins
Plus weedy men with Bully breeds they haven’t a hope in hell of controlling.

Well mannered dogs are lovely.
” Reactive “ the new term for the Covid era dogs

AnneValentine · 27/10/2023 16:28

Ylvamoon · 27/10/2023 14:59

... and today's dog hater thred is:

DOG ANNOYING US IN RESTAURANT

So?

SadnessIs · 27/10/2023 16:28

Riola · 27/10/2023 16:25

What a horrible experience for your child. Did they put it on a lead in the end? and did any staff intervene or apologise?

I feel if a business chooses to allow dogs they must take reasonable care to monitor things and get involved if a dog is acting aggressively or bothering people.

I’d provide some ‘feedback’ to the manager.

Show quote history

Yes but very reluctantly, it was obvious too as soon as they entered that the dog was nervous/reactive around children as it was barking so much and pulling on it’s lead to get to my dc. At that point ds was quiet as well ! So of course when he started with his tics it just made things much worse. They weren’t quick to react at all and put the dog back on a lead. After they did the dog was still very noisy and they kept eye rolling in our direction !

Redebs · 27/10/2023 16:28

WilmaWonka · 27/10/2023 15:59

I always thought dogs were banned from food selling premises due to hygiene, I.e pissing or crapping on the floor which dogs are liable to do. How anyone could support it or find it necessary for a dog to be in a cafe I don’t know.

Bonkers!

As long as they don't go into the kitchen, they can do anything in the eating area.

SadnessIs · 27/10/2023 16:29

Staff did nothing the only thing I noticed was one waitress making a fuss of the dog and saying how cute it was !

SadnessIs · 27/10/2023 16:30

I do think if places especially cafes are dog friendly the dogs need to be on a lead at all times

WinterDeWinter · 27/10/2023 16:30

the fact that she's interpreted 'dog-friendly' as 'all customers must greet canines warmly and make them feel good about themselves' is making me larf.

Elodie09 · 27/10/2023 16:31

Some dogs don't smell too good either, especially when wet. I was having lunch with a dog owning friend the other day and two huge , wet dogs came in wagging hairy tails and shaking themselves whilst wandering through the restaurant.
Neither of us enjoyed it.

Riola · 27/10/2023 16:32

@Jimbojobsworth
Aside from the hand washing issue which is really bad - did the waitress even spray the area with disinfectant after picking it up? 🤢
I assume not.

ActDottie · 27/10/2023 16:32

Yanbu and I take my dogs to cafes all the time, but I keep them on a lead near me.

Bloom15 · 27/10/2023 16:33

HiCandles · 27/10/2023 14:34

I absolutely hate this new culture of dog friendliness everywhere. I totally agree with you. I don't dislike dogs or other people's children or other adults, but I want to enjoy my meal in peace with the people I chose to come with. It's so rude to let your dog wander up and annoy people. Unfortunately the type that does this is never going to listen to you asking nicely, because they wouldn't allow their dog to do it in the first place if they were a reasonable thoughtful human being. I would've done the same as you OP - but also told the staff. If they didn't handle it well I would leave a Google and TripAdvisor review about it.

Completely agree with this.

It is so frustrating

Riola · 27/10/2023 16:33

@SadnessIs that’s awful. They clearly didn’t care one bit about the safety or comfort of your children.

jannier · 27/10/2023 16:34

Onthegreeen · 27/10/2023 14:38

The staff could clearly see what was happening. One of them was also nearby when we asked the woman to keep her dog at her own table. They obviously didn't see anything wrong with this behaviour.

Show quote history

Why not speak to staff directly ?

ThePoshUns · 27/10/2023 16:34

YANBU
I occasionally take my dog to pubs and restaurants , but she's on her leas and sits at my feet under the table.
No way would I let her disturb other customers like that.
I fully appreciate that not everyone likes dogs even in ' dog- friendly' establishments.
Just because somewhere is 'dog-friendly' doesn't mean other customers have to be.
Some people are sadly just thick.

sollenwir · 27/10/2023 16:34

TooBusyGazingAtStarss · 27/10/2023 16:27

Its the same with their kids 🤣

Show quote history

Except, it's not because dogs and kids are not remotely comparable.

Redebs · 27/10/2023 16:34

Can we stop comparing dogs to children please?
It's ridiculous!
Dogs are animals.

PinkflowersWhiteBerries · 27/10/2023 16:35

YANBU. I love my dogs, but they rarely get taken to cafes and if they do, they are kept close by on a lead.
We do have a local gentleman who allows his large hair dog ( who is otherwise very lovely) to mooch around tables in the pub. He is a local treasure and so no-one challenges him, but it drives me nuts.

sollenwir · 27/10/2023 16:36

Redebs · 27/10/2023 16:34

Can we stop comparing dogs to children please?
It's ridiculous!
Dogs are animals.

Agreed, and have made the same point already.
It's a stupid comparison.

SadnessIs · 27/10/2023 16:36

Riola · 27/10/2023 16:33

@SadnessIs that’s awful. They clearly didn’t care one bit about the safety or comfort of your children.

The barking was irritating when it was on a lead but not terrible what really worried me was the growling and how it intensified - the dog clearly wasn’t happy and I was shocked how the owner wasn’t bothered , it was growling and lip licking and displaying warning signs - they just said he doesn’t like noisy children well if you knew that you wouldn’t let a dog off it’s lead after it had been barking at children already !!

Username620 · 27/10/2023 16:36

Marstonroadmrsreturns · 27/10/2023 15:33

When I was a child, we tied our dogs up outside shops, cafes, the library, etc. When did people stop doing this? Also, coats, when did dogs start wearing coats?

I presume some people are scared their pedigree dogs will be stolen. I don’t take my dog to the shops for this reason.
I hate it when people haven’t trained or don’t control their dogs but it seems to be much more of a British thing.
I was out in a restaurant in Germany with my dog last week. There were 4 other dogs there and all 5 of them were lying quietly under the tables. Not a single growl or bark.

ThePoshUns · 27/10/2023 16:36

SeaPool · 27/10/2023 15:12

Dog friendly means the dog can come in and sit quietly beside their owner without bothering anyone. It doesn't mean the dog can strut around holding court. One of the proudest moments I've ever had with my dog was when we stood up to leave a pub after a meal the lady at the next table said, 'Oh, I didn't even know you had a dog with you.'

Edited

Agree! I've had the same and I feel proud of my dog and myself

TooBusyGazingAtStarss · 27/10/2023 16:37

@sollenwir I am not comparing dogs to children. Just saying this is how they would be with their kids as well.