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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My son's company is irritating me today. Help

41 replies

Gellhell · 21/10/2023 17:42

He has a hacking cough he can't help. But he's had it all week and it's a really dramatic over the top cough. He's had it all week and it's getting on my wick.

He played football today. I took him, got his kit, made breakfast. His team won but because he personally didn't score a goal, he has been sullen all the way home.

I went to the allotment and beach to get seaweed ft said allotment today. I said if he helped me fill a bag of seaweed I'd get him an ice-cream. He didn't.

At the allotment he stood there chanting I'm bored over and over.

I've had enough of the little twat today. Am I a terrible human? Help.

OP posts:
Sofaz34 · 21/10/2023 17:43

Haha, no not at all. He sounds intolerable but hopefully it's just a day thing.

Wonkasworld · 21/10/2023 17:45

Confusing thread title, OP 😁

katmarie · 21/10/2023 17:45

Depends, how old is he? If he's 11, then yanbu, they can be little arses. If he's 23, you have bigger problems Grin

Original poster
Gellhell · 21/10/2023 17:46

Yes he's 11!

OP posts:
Ollifer · 21/10/2023 17:47

I thought he was like 15 but then when u said about bribing him with an ice cream I was confused, how old is he ? 😁

Ktime · 21/10/2023 17:47

YANBU. Can you offload him on to anyone?

Aquamarine1029 · 21/10/2023 17:48

At the allotment he stood there chanting I'm bored over and over.

You should have told him he can either be quiet or he can sit in the car. He's 11, well old enough to be told his behaviour and whinging is making other people miserable. He can go be miserable somewhere else.

WeighDownOnMeStayTillMorning · 21/10/2023 17:49

Ha ha I knew he was 11 by the description as I have one just like him.

Solidarity 🍷

Theunamedcat · 21/10/2023 17:51

I had thought this thread was started by the mum of a child on the train today he did nothing but scream wail and say no she was responding with flop like calmness I'm pretty sure after the first hour she is on some serious drugs because his wailing was nails on chalkboard pitch that had several people fantasising about shoving him out the door at the next stop and leaving him every demand was met with a reward every reward was met with a scream and NOOOOOOOO WAAAAAHHH (snot trails)

She kept changing seats after each tantrum so she gave everyone a break from it all but realistically pissed off three carriages of people instead of just one

It passes like spiky shit

Gymnopedie · 21/10/2023 17:54

OP if I were you I'd start saving up for his dressing gown of doom. He's clearly going to be One of Those.

Wonkasworld · 21/10/2023 17:55

Gymnopedie · 21/10/2023 17:54

OP if I were you I'd start saving up for his dressing gown of doom. He's clearly going to be One of Those.

😂

EvenBetta · 21/10/2023 17:57

Aquamarine1029 · 21/10/2023 17:48

At the allotment he stood there chanting I'm bored over and over.

You should have told him he can either be quiet or he can sit in the car. He's 11, well old enough to be told his behaviour and whinging is making other people miserable. He can go be miserable somewhere else.

This. Why allow him to be whiny and annoying?

Original poster
Gellhell · 21/10/2023 17:58

I hope I'm not raising Mr entitled of the male species. I've been congratulating myself for not loosing my shit. Now I've come on here to safely offload. Thanks for hearing me 😃😬

OP posts:
Original poster
Gellhell · 21/10/2023 17:59

Yes he did sit in the car eventually after I told him to do so!!

OP posts:
Ohhelpicantthinkofaname · 21/10/2023 18:03

11 year old boys are an irritating bunch. He’ll be ok in a few years 😂

Loubelle70 · 21/10/2023 18:08

DGS same lol. Age 12...everything OTT lol. love him to bits..but shhh he's annoying at times too 😲😂. Hes always 'bored' but usually when hes not got your full attention.
I feel ya OP. My grandson drives his mum up the wall bless her... he's entering teens and hes tantrum after tantrum, everyone is wtf lol

itsgettingweird · 21/10/2023 18:23

Hahahahahaha - no yanbu!

My son does a sport. I called a family meeting (it's just me and him) to discuss house rules and I said I felt he wanted one where I didn't make him do anything boring.

His face lit up when he thought this house rule would be great.

So we wrote a house rule

~ don't have to do anything that's boring.

Cue the following week.

DS "mum what time are we leaving for my sports event"

ME " we aren't going. I find it boring hanging around waiting or you all day so I'm loving this new house rule"

DS "but ....... Shock"

He's never complained about being bored since. 🤣🤣🤣 (and we obviously scraps the house rules!)

Plonkdropdown · 21/10/2023 18:37

🤣🤣 👌🏿

Pherian · 21/10/2023 19:28

I have an 11 year old. He's not like this. He loses at football all the time and can get a bit moody. He will go into his room and play his play station and chat to his friends and them he seems to perk up.

Maybe he just needs some time to chill by himself playing his games console, watching youtube and chatting to his friends.

Give him a day off to himself.

MargaretThursday · 21/10/2023 19:53

Tbf if I'd had a hacking cough all week, having played football then I'd really not be feeling like hanging round the beach and allotment.
Hot chocolate and warm bath at home followed by a nice book would have been all I'd have been up for.

Original poster
Gellhell · 21/10/2023 21:01

I know. But I actually said give football a miss. He absolutely wasn't going to.

And after lunch I couldn't stand being trapped in the house listening to the devil song of YouTubers. I also suggested a nice hot chic but he opted for toxic waste instead 🤢.

OP posts:
boomtickhouse · 21/10/2023 21:51

Feeding him toxic waste shit really isn't going to help his mood or behaviour.

I think they are a funny age at 11. No little kids but not independent either. Mine struggles to know what to do with himself sometimes and has zero concept of time management.

Q2C4 · 21/10/2023 22:06

Aquamarine1029 · 21/10/2023 17:48

At the allotment he stood there chanting I'm bored over and over.

You should have told him he can either be quiet or he can sit in the car. He's 11, well old enough to be told his behaviour and whinging is making other people miserable. He can go be miserable somewhere else.

And how do you enforce that? You can't force him to do either.

Mumsanetta · 21/10/2023 22:14

Q2C4 · 21/10/2023 22:06

And how do you enforce that? You can't force him to do either.

Show quote history

How do you enforce that? I’ve never understood this when talking about behaviour management of kids. I mean, how do you enforce anything? Society is built on the enforcement of rules. If an 11 ye old doesn’t do as their asked there are a million ways to make them and the very first serious attempt is likely to work eg no YouTube for the rest of the week 🤷‍♀️

Q2C4 · 21/10/2023 22:26

No YouTube for the rest of the week is unlikely to cheer him up (or OP who'd be in for a miserable week enforcing that one). It wouldn't guarantee he'd go & sit in the car either.

Sounds to me as though he didn't want to be at the beach or the allotment, so I'm not surprised he wasn't happy about it. Trying to force someone to be happy about a situation they don't like or to mask their feelings and pretend to be happy about it is a potentially problematic route to go down in my opinion.