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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask how much you spend on your children at birthdays/Christmas?

175 replies

glossypeach · 20/10/2023 21:31

I know it’s all relative to finances, ages and just generally how much you’re willing to spend - but I’m curious. So how much do spend on your children at Christmas and on their birthdays?

OP posts:
PuttingDownRoots · 20/10/2023 21:33

It depends what they want/need! Its been between £20-£150.

Pinkshoppingbag · 20/10/2023 21:34

Probably too much! But I only have one.

Bornonsunday · 20/10/2023 21:34

Around £200 each - 4 teenage kids, but we used to spend £100 or less when I wasn't working. Slightly depends what they want need though so sometimes a bit more or less.

Comedycook · 20/10/2023 21:35

About £200-300

Terfosaurus · 20/10/2023 21:36

About £40 for birthdays.
£80ish for Christmas. Maybe up to £100 if I can afford it. But I'm lucky that my Mum is happy to club together to buy things they want that are out of budget.

WhisperingAngle · 20/10/2023 21:36

Depends! His 17th birthday - a fairly new car.

His 2nd birthday - Bob the Builder toys, Duplo - maybe £75. This Christmas (18) maybe £500 ish. Finances change, circumstances change.

CeeJay81 · 20/10/2023 21:37

£100 For Birthdays, £200ish at Xmas. Was a bit less when younger.

TheChosenTwo · 20/10/2023 21:37

Quite a lot really. We have 3dc and huge families we also buy for - I’ve never actually worked out what we spend, I do it all over 2 weekends in December, couldn’t bare to drag it out longer than it really takes! One weekend to go to the shops in person and one weekend to order things online.
Love shopping for my dc though; it’s one of my favourite bits of Christmas shopping, doing their stockings. Dds are probably too old for one now but they insist! Love choosing them earrings and some nice skincare and goodies that they would buy themselves.

DilemmaDelilah · 20/10/2023 21:38

Birthdays up to £50. Christmas up to £30 - there are a lot of presents to buy! And they are adults with partners and children of their own.
Those who engage in the annual 'Let's see who gives their child the biggest pile of presents' competition will think me very mean, but it works for us - I refuse to go into debt to buy presents.

MatildaonMain · 20/10/2023 21:38

About £150

He’s 3, so fairly inexpensive to buy for at the moment - I expect it will increase as he ages.

TappingTed · 20/10/2023 21:39

Varies over the years... and what they'd like or want... one year dd got a MacBook...but others maybe only £50 main present...

Generally around £200 birthday £300 xmas...this year ds (11) will get a new xbox as a joint birthday/xmas gift...

MissingMoominMamma · 20/10/2023 21:40

£200 each, unless there’s something really specific that we know they want. This includes DIL now too.

CuteCillian · 20/10/2023 21:40

In my head, about £100 each on stocking fillers and little bits and then a main pressie, this could vary from £25 to much higher depending on what has been asked for/fits in with finances.

Nodancingshoes · 20/10/2023 21:40

About £100/£150 birthdays and up to £500 Christmas. I save all year for Christmas in the works 'Thrift' club

FuckingHellAdele · 20/10/2023 21:41

Quite a lot, but they're older now and we can afford it.

When they were younger and money was tighter, I definitely went for the who cares if it's cheap, look at the size of that box! approach

DilemmaDelilah · 20/10/2023 21:42

As a matter of interest... Why more at Christmas than on their birthdays? My opinion (which you are free to disagree with) is that birthdays are more special because they are just about the birthday person. Obviously some of you don't think that way. I'm not implying that you are wrong in any way... but it would be interesting to know the thinking behind it?

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 20/10/2023 21:45

DilemmaDelilah · 20/10/2023 21:42

As a matter of interest... Why more at Christmas than on their birthdays? My opinion (which you are free to disagree with) is that birthdays are more special because they are just about the birthday person. Obviously some of you don't think that way. I'm not implying that you are wrong in any way... but it would be interesting to know the thinking behind it?

Stocking fillers

Terfosaurus · 20/10/2023 21:46

DilemmaDelilah · 20/10/2023 21:42

As a matter of interest... Why more at Christmas than on their birthdays? My opinion (which you are free to disagree with) is that birthdays are more special because they are just about the birthday person. Obviously some of you don't think that way. I'm not implying that you are wrong in any way... but it would be interesting to know the thinking behind it?

I often wonder that myself tbh, even though I spend more at Christmas. I suppose because Christmas includes Stockings/cracker presents so they get more at Christmas than they do a birthday.

harrietm87 · 20/10/2023 21:47

@DilemmaDelilah cant speak for everyone obviously but we get several
christmas presents plus a stocking for our kids (who are small and still believe in Father Christmas), but usually only one or two presents for their birthday, so can end up spending more at Christmas.

Saying that, so far I’ve saved the bikes for birthday presents because they are such big gifts.

DinnaeFashYersel · 20/10/2023 21:47

It really depends on what they want last year they got big presents - PlayStation and laptop. But this year they haven't asked for anything like that do probably about £100 each.

Restinpeacefavouritecoathanger · 20/10/2023 21:48

My daughter will have approx £75 on her this Christmas - she is one and does not need much.
So far we have --
Musical book £15
I'll be buying a sensory tube (one of those with floating fish) seen that for £25
A few bits and bobs to unwrap under the tree £15

So she will have another £20 if I see anything.

Think on top I'll probably buy her a few bits of clothes for her next size like pyjamas but I don't count that.

Girasoli · 20/10/2023 21:51

The less money for birthdays thing might be that primary school age kids tend to have parties with either a handful of friends or the whole class so they get loads of toys already for their birthdays.

I probably spend around £50 each for birthdays (sometimes less) and around £100 each for Christmas. DC are 3 and 7.

DilemmaDelilah · 20/10/2023 21:57

Ah - silly me. I didn't include the stocking fillers. I don't do stockings for my children any more as they are adults... I stopped when they were 21, but we always had a rule that stocking things were just little... and certain things had to be in every year. Satsuma, chocolate coins, big tube of smarties, nice socks, nice pants, bubble bath. When I was very poor there were useful things like gloves in there, as well as some cheap little toys, but I certainly never went overboard on stockings.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 20/10/2023 22:10

I think also what you spend can differ depending on if you have extended family that gets gifts for your LOs

Sparehair · 20/10/2023 22:12

Dc are 13&11. This Christmas will probably be about 300 each. However, this will include stuff I basically would have to buy anyway- both are getting a new ski helmet and ds is getting leg pads and arm guard for cricket. Stockings are pants, socks, books, shower gel, hair ties, phone charger, stationary etc.