AIBU to ask how much you spend on your children at birthdays/Christmas?

[glossypeach]

I know it’s all relative to finances, ages and just generally how much you’re willing to spend - but I’m curious. So how much do spend on your children at Christmas and on their birthdays?

Very little expenditure when they were younger, but now the two DD are older, £500 cash each for Christmas and birthdays and £200 on smaller gifts to open.

I've always wondered why they get more at Christmas than birthdays but they do and I don't think I could swap now.
Birthdays, usually no more than about £100 on presents but since a playstation game is about £60 it's not a huge pile.
Christmas is more but all depends what they need/want. Last year was a PS5 and laptop, this year one has asked for a couple of games so £120ish and the other will get the same in vouchers for their favourite shops.
Then stockings on top of that, always get a bit of Lego and a few other random things to open.
No other presents from family tho, just a fiver in a card from a couple of aunties.
I suppose it's sometimes quite a lot but we never go in debt to buy things and apart from clothes they need throughout the year they don't get anything else.

Op things to consider when comparing "budgets"

Some posters will say they spend £50, ignoring the £250 from Dad and the other £300 between the grandparents and the Aunties.

Some people include things like music, Dance and sports lessons as a Christmas / Birthday gift others consider it a monthly spend.

To some a stocking is a few sweets, pencil, comic and a wind up Santa.
Others the stocking is really a huge sack with games, clothes, lots of wee extras etc.

Some people will only buy drawing supplies and books at Christmas again others will put in the supermarket trolley without thinking about it.

Also some will make their budget go for miles buying second hand etc their kids might get £200 worth of stuff picked up for £75 from Facebook.

Also families with kids close in age may well get away with sharing consoles. Only children will need a whole console to themselves.

Buy what your kids need and don't go wild or get into debt.

£200 each approx for Xmas, sometimes more, it’s not always exactly equal, around £100 on birthday
s.

Quite a lot - don't have a set budget and I've bought stuff through the year (mostly give toys at Christmas and birthdays and rarely at other times through the year). I'd guess I've spent £200 already on 5yo DC and I'll get more as I see deals or nice products online. Also spend hundreds on theatre and experiences like Santa Specials, maybe £800 on different productions and days out through Nov/Dec (inc entry for PILs). We have an 18m old too but not spending much on her as we've kept all the toddler toys and she still gets in free to a lot of venues.

£30-70 for birthday and same for Christmas. Both combined came in well under £150

Our DD is coming up for 2 so early days still...

Gosh. You guys spend loads! We very comfortable - but this Xmas I’ll spend less than 50/each on my boys (5+2)

I’m up cycling a second hand ikea kitchen for smallest - and 5 yo has some new Lego soldiers and a wooden fort (also fb market place + a lick of paint) - suspect my creative efforts will be less appreciated in a couple of years time though

DH and I just chatting - and actually the dog is getting the most expensive Xmas present this year / he’s getting old and creaky and I’ve ordered him a big memory foam dog bed
wirh washable covers. So he can be a comfy + only medium stinky old boy.

Last year they wanted latest gadgets switch for dd iPhone for ds so a fair bit on each, this year they have all the extensive gadgets and not much they have really asked for so will be a lot less different every year as to what they want.

@Hooplahooping kids get bigger so do the price tags. A bike for a 12 yo is a lot more expensive than a bike for a 5 yo. But it's still just a bike.

Same with clothes, trainers and electronics (phones, watches, headphones, consoles)

Embrace the big cheapish bits of plastic while they last.

£50 each for DC and DGC for birthdays. £200 each for adult DC and a £60 stocking each. £50 for each DGS and a £50 stocking each. I also do gifting to my 3 DC so they each get £500 twice a year. They spent it how they please. My DD always pays hers off her mortgage. My 2 DS spend it on their home or put it towards a holiday.

I try and only buy second hand for them. For environmental and money reasons. They have either been too young to notice or old enough to agree
Spend around £50 each (about 200 each therefore if new). Occasionally will need to be more (is a laptop for school) or less (kids carboot stuff/charity shop is so cheap it would be overwhelming to get it all and unnecessary).

Always do a mix of fun, edible and practical.

@Sugarfree23 Some posters will say they spend £50, ignoring the £250 from Dad and the other £300 between the grandparents and the Aunties.

But OP asked what I spend, not how much gets spent overall which is a different question. My budget is £x regardless of how much other people spend on them.

Average £400 per child. I am anal about spending as close as possible to the same amount. One year I managed to get DC1 and DC2 to within 50p of each other!!

Trying to cut down now that they are all adults in their 20s but struggling with the idea that the present pile will be less.

While knowing at the same time, that the three of them will get one present for me!!

My children don't have any grandparents and don't receive Christmas gifts from any other family member, so I have always felt I had to make up for that.

About £100 at birthday's and same at Christmas. But they are autistic so we are buying iPads or tvs often through the year when they break as we can't expect them to wait until Christmas as they don't understand.

Yes that's exactly my point. Some kids will only get from mum & dad. Some will get from mum and dad separately and a load from extended family.

Which makes comparing budgets a bit meaningless.

MN can very often be a place where people brag about how frugal they are at Christmas. Yeah I only spend £50 (but they get lots more from Granny etc etc)

Usually about 80 for birthdays and 150 for Xmas.

This year it'll be more as one is having a games console. Definitely the most ill have spent and hoping it's a one off as I'm a single parent. But something the rest of us can enjoy too I guess.

Oh right. I kind of see what you're saying. I have a frugal (by MN standards) Christmas. We also have a large family. But I'd have a frugal Christmas if we didn't. Because that's how I do things. So to me the extended family is totally unrelated to what I do or don't spend.

Different amounts at different ages. Under 3, maybe £50-100 each.
From when they were about 3 and actually really wanted specific things, anything from £300-£600 each usually. A couple of times it was more because they asked for a PC.

Now they're teens, we tend to give them £500 cash and then buy them some bits. Clothes, trainers, aftershave, perfume, art stuff, things for their rooms.

They're both good savers and don't waste money so it works really well.

@Terfosaurus what the extended family spend does play a part.

Say a child has outgrown their bike, but has their heart set on Barbies House.
If its only the parents who are spending on the child they may feel they need to get both total spend say £250. But if extended family are spending too they are in a position to suggest Grannies split and get the bike between them. The parents can legitimately say they only spent £100.

Other families might say we'll wait until spring or birthday for the bike even if it's more then their normal birthday budget.

Same if its a console or something, if only parents are buying they need to get games too. If you have some generous relatives they can get the games. Therefore, reducing what the parents are spending.

What the Op is asking is only a small part of the bigger picture.

About £400-£500 birthday and £600-£700 Christmas they are 7&8. They dont have anybody else that buys them for either so we make it extra special and buy that little bit more.
Christmas will be less this year as they had expensive consoles last year therefore dont need them this year.

Yes I understand what you're saying. And yes some families do what you've described.

But answering for me and what I do, the extended family don't play a part in what I spend.

For example, DS2 often gets a large lego set from my Mum and me. If for any reason my Mum couldn't/wouldn't join money to buy that then DS wouldn't get it. My budget would remain the same. He'd get a smaller set.

I know what OP has asked is only part of the bigger picture, but I'm answering what she asked. Because that's how questions work.

As someone who works closely with families from all different backgrounds, I really struggle to believe so many claim to spend less than £100 on birthdays and Christmas. That really doesn't go far. Most children/teens have at least either bikes/consoles/phones/laptops/tablets/Lego sets/scooters/trampolines or the latest toy fads that cost much more than the total of some of these budgets and it doesn't really add up .

Because some people combine budgets with other family members. (Which doesn't mean their budget is more than they've said, just that the overall spend is)
Or look out for deals. Or buy 2nd hand. Or knock offs/back of a lorry etc.

Or the people saying they spend less than £100 aren't the families buying that expensive stuff.

Last year my DS1 wanted expensive ear buds. They were about £150. Using a combination of deals and trade-ins I paid £70. So within my budget.

I would have thought that knowing your mother went into debt for presents that "filled the floor" would make you more inclined to be sensible about what you buy for your own child at Christmas. Have you considered counselling?

We have a high household income.

DC get stocking & one "big" gift from us (things like a bike/scooter or a lego set etc). The stocking isn't huge and has sweets, orange, socks, bath bomb, book, felt tips or similar crafty thing, small toy like a lego poly bag, card game etc).

One set of grandparents spend about 40, the others about 25, then 4 aunts/uncles spend about 15 each on things like books, games, hama bead kits etc.

I think they are pretty lucky, they are always delighted.