Having a bit of a disagreement with the school. AIBU

[Blueystolemyinsanity]

in our school half way through year 5 and 6 it’s actively encouraged that we allow the children to gain some independence in walking home from school - I have no issue with this and it I want My daughter to feel confident by the time she gets to secondary school.
I would not say I was an over anxious parent as in my children have always been able to do things everyone else does.
the school is situated on a road and the gate leads directly to a zebras crossing, it’s a fairly busy road but speed limit is less than 35.
2 years ago they introduced school coats with logo but they are very dark blue and once the clocks change it will be dark when DD leaves school. I want her to be able to wear a brighter colour winter coat

AIBU ? Or have I some how shifted in to a lunatic anxious mum 🤣🙈

I would have thought your child should be able to wear any coat you want?

Get her a fluorescent bag or armband?

Get her a flashing arm bad/ hi vis vest.

Are the coats compulsory ?

I think you have a point. I only buy bright coats for my kids for this reason. In our school they gave out high vis vests to every child to wear on their way to school. I would suggest this to the school but I’d be reluctant to make a fuss about changing the coat. You could give her a high vis armband or stick the strips on her school bag if you get nowhere

Seems fair enough. They should be encouraging the kids to be safe

It's uniform, so I imagine not. As that is how uniform works.

Get her a reflective armband, OP.

School usually finishes at 3pm... its never dark then?

What time is your primary aged child leaving school? Is around 3pm not standard? Is it really dark where you are at that time? It wouldn't be round here.

I would stick a fluorescent vest on her over the top of her coat.

https://www.halfords.com/cycling/cycling-clothing/hi-vis/halfords-hi-vis-vest-kids-103352.html

We live rurally and everybody wears them. They are very effective in headlights.

Your concern is valid. As a part of encouraging the children walk home they should also be making them think about how to make themselves visible- reflectors, vests etc. Preferably handed out from school.
Dark clothing, early dark nights and poor street lighting make people virtually invisible.

Make sure she's got something reflective on her bag.
I don't think the school can insist on the coat. Is it an independent school?
Someone should have engaged their brain about this but you could point it out to them.

Surely lots of children will be leaving and crossing the road at the same time so cars will be aware of lots of children. I would add a reflective band or hat/scarf and tell them to cross together with others not on their own.

I agree OP. I think some people assume they are more visible than they really are.

You are being unreasonable. Uniform is there for a reason.

Is the crossing staffed? Our primary has senior staff out there every morning/ afternoon.

If not I wouldn't let my 11 year old cross a road in the dark.

@Blueystolemyinsanity
its the same argument at many schools 🥹. It's completely ridiculous!!

what would your Dd actually use/wear??

we bought flashing dog tags/leaded/ collar etc because the eldest was dog mad & happy to add them to her school bag & she was happy to add fluro stripes to her school coat sleeves and have a bobble hat with a flashing bobble on the top.

wild horses would not have got her into a fluro vest.

Are the school coats definitely mandatory? I've never known a primary school to mandate coats, and it seems like an odd choice of colour when they'll be walking home. I never realised just how invisible people in dark clothing are at night time until I started driving outside of a major (well-lit) city.

I'm hoping they can see sense OP that you can either put her in a brighter coat or let her wear something reflective. Will she go for a hi-vis jacket over the top of her coat or might she be at that age where it's too embarrassing? Otherwise a bright torch might be an option to be more visible?

What reason? To make them invisible on dark winter afternoons?

There's uniform and there's common sense. Take your pick.

@DaftQuestionForToday haha yeh mine neither
will have a look at some of the other options you have listed !
she finishes school at 3.45 probablr doesn’t get out until near 4 and 3 days a week finishes at 4.45 ( coding, music and art )

Waiting for the "reason" why primary aged children need to be walking home in dark clothing after dark. 🧐

I have no issue with uniform …. But coats are not work in the school building so I think we should be able to put them in any coat.

If you're that worried paint her in fluorescent yellow.

To make them hard to see?

What time does your school finish, that it is dark ?

That said, you can put something on top of the coat - from arm bands to a complete vest.

Well in that case I'd either buy a hi vis vest, or just tell the school she's not wearing the school coat on the days she finishes late.