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Original poster

To not bring back duty free for family

70 replies

rocknrollaa · 19/10/2023 17:30

I'm going on holiday soon. My relatives (who go abroad 2-3 times a year) have asked me to bring back duty free for them from the airport. I don't live near these relatives so it would just be in my house until I visit them at Christmas.

Had an argument which just resulted in me telling them I don't want to carry it around/ store it for the sake of them saving a few ££ on alcohol/ tobacco.

One of the relatives is a lifetime smoker and I don't want to fuel the habit because they have just been diagnosed with a health condition which is almost certainly a result of smoking, at least in part!

They are also well off and have more than enough money to buy these things at full price.

We had a big argument about it and they are telling me I'm being completely unreasonable. So am I?

OP posts:
TheSpottedZebra · 19/10/2023 17:33

Ì wouldn't buy tobacco for anyone.

YANBU.

Re the booze, I'd just say you stocked up for yourself.or you had a sore shoulder and didn't want to carry it. Or you forgot.

Natty13 · 19/10/2023 17:35

You're never unreasonable for saying no to a favour.

If people make saying no difficult for me (by arguing about my "no") then I just lie for an easy life. Cba arguing with idiots. I'd just agree then say they didn't have Bacardi in stock/cigarettes? All sold out. Empty shelves can you believe it!/the only cashier went on break and my flight was boarding so I couldn't wait to pay. They'll know you're lying but who cares?

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 19/10/2023 17:36

You used your limit up for someone else you owed a favour to, so sorry!

Original poster
rocknrollaa · 19/10/2023 17:37

@Natty13 Ha, that did occur to me to be honest, they just kept pushing it after I'd said no, so if they carry on I'll probably just relent but then not actually get it 😂

OP posts:
GasPanic · 19/10/2023 17:48

Depends. Would you ever like or expect them to do anything for you in the future ?

If not, then you can do what you want and not care.

However, if there is a point in life in the future that you would like them to return the favour, don't be surprised if it is something that becomes impossible.

qwerty123454 · 19/10/2023 17:51

Just don't do it and say you forgot when asked

Tinkerbyebye · 19/10/2023 17:53

You have said no, so don’t get it

i wouldn't buy cigarettes for anyone, just tell them you don’t want to be responsible for a deterioration in their health. As to alcohol, sorry you will be bringing back stuff for you

dont cave

JMSA · 19/10/2023 17:55

I would, because it's family. And who am I to make judgements based on someone else's health.

Original poster
rocknrollaa · 19/10/2023 17:55

GasPanic · 19/10/2023 17:48

Depends. Would you ever like or expect them to do anything for you in the future ?

If not, then you can do what you want and not care.

However, if there is a point in life in the future that you would like them to return the favour, don't be surprised if it is something that becomes impossible.

Well I wouldn't ask them to inconvenience themselves at the airport buying duty free for me just so I could save a few quid on some booze (especially if I was as well off as they are). So no I don't expect a like for like favour in return!

OP posts:
VisionsOfSplendour · 19/10/2023 17:55

I didn't realize that bringing duty free back was still a thing, it's a bit 1970s isn't it. How much difference in price is it

I wouldn't be doing it either

Original poster
rocknrollaa · 19/10/2023 17:58

VisionsOfSplendour · 19/10/2023 17:55

I didn't realize that bringing duty free back was still a thing, it's a bit 1970s isn't it. How much difference in price is it

I wouldn't be doing it either

Well quite... it's no VAT so I guess 20%? It would probably save them £30-50 (which is literally nothing to them)

OP posts:
Paperbagsaremine · 19/10/2023 17:58

"Oh God I forgot, sorreeee"

MrsKwazi · 19/10/2023 17:58

I refuse to buy/bring back tobacco for anyone. The few smokers that are left all know and they don’t even ask anymore. I work in healthcare. IDGAS about the criticism

Original poster
rocknrollaa · 19/10/2023 18:01

MrsKwazi · 19/10/2023 17:58

I refuse to buy/bring back tobacco for anyone. The few smokers that are left all know and they don’t even ask anymore. I work in healthcare. IDGAS about the criticism

Yes... I accept that they smoke and that's fine, their decision, whatever... but I don't want to be the one providing it for them! (Especially since this worrying diagnosis).

OP posts:
WednesdaysChild50 · 19/10/2023 18:06

Get a backbone and just say no

Coffeerum · 19/10/2023 18:07

Booze and thing never even look cheaper than they are in uk supermarkets anyway!

GasPanic · 19/10/2023 18:12

rocknrollaa · 19/10/2023 17:55

Well I wouldn't ask them to inconvenience themselves at the airport buying duty free for me just so I could save a few quid on some booze (especially if I was as well off as they are). So no I don't expect a like for like favour in return!

Show quote history

Yep. One thing is for sure in life, it's never worth keeping things cordial with loaded relatives.

I have some I do some stuff for now and again. They don't do much for me but have helped out other relatives of mine who help me so it's all give and take. Either you believe that is the way families work or not I guess.

sqirrelfriends · 19/10/2023 18:13

YANBU, I refuse to bring back tobacco for anyone.

IMO If they choose to smoke, fine. However I won’t play any part in it.

TheHappyCarrot · 19/10/2023 18:13

Technically, I think it's illegal to bring duty free back for other people.

newamsterdam · 19/10/2023 18:16

VisionsOfSplendour · 19/10/2023 17:55

I didn't realize that bringing duty free back was still a thing, it's a bit 1970s isn't it. How much difference in price is it

I wouldn't be doing it either

Are you kidding? It's a huge saving. Especially now in and out of the UK post Brexit.
I can save more than the cost of my flight on 2 bottles of spirits.

coolkatt · 19/10/2023 18:21

i

Photographsandmemories · 19/10/2023 18:21

Ciggies weigh nothing. I would bring them back for them. Such a trivial thing to create bad feeling over otherwise. And I don't smoke either but don't see myself as superior to those who do.

coolkatt · 19/10/2023 18:25

i hate when someeone usually my dad asks me to do
this, i absolutely abhor smoking and anything to do with cigarettes and tobacco i can't even touch a packet the smell is just vile even the outer wrapper makes me gag and so the thought of them in my suitcase and next to my clothing and stuff just turns my stomach. and it's not just a pack they are asking it's like the max amount allowed which takes up space i could used to bring myself and kids things back so then i get well just open the packs and spread them out which is even worse eugh getting the ick just thinking about it, so no, i stopped doing it, made up excuses other folk had asked me and now everyone gets the message not to even think about asking

dementedpixie · 19/10/2023 18:31

The duty free allowance is not that large so they can't be saving that much. I don't even bring cigarettes back for my mum and she knows not to ask!

Spacecowboys · 19/10/2023 18:35

I would if a family member asked. It’s not something that would inconvenience me
much at all tbh.