To say to DP "you are not putting on weight"

[P23678]

DP is 27 male. Works FT and WFH. He tries to do 10k steps every day (either before or after work) as his job is sedentary. Since we have had the warm weather, he has been living in shorts and t-shirts. Now with the colder weather incoming, he decided to wear more appropriate clothing. Yesterday, he couldn’t get his jeans buttoned up but his t-shirts, polo and shirts all still fit fine.

He said, I am putting on weight. I said, perhaps your body shape has changed or that's because you are sitting down a lot. He then went off looking worried and tried some other clothes on. Again, the tops were fine, just struggled to get the buttons done up on trousers and jeans.

His diet hasn’t changed much. He doesn’t snack during the day. Apart from the few biscuits and sweets after the evening meal.

He was a lot bigger last year, but made a conscious effort to drop around 3 stone. He was around the 13stone mark. He is now around 10st7lbs. 5feet 7 tall. So is conscious that he could easily go back to that size, if he is not careful.

He has said that he is going to write down everything he eats. Also, he said he is not having any biscuits and/or sweets before bed tonight. To see if that makes any difference.

Any ideas? Is it the WFH? and the fact that the 10k steps isn't enough activity?

No I'm really not. I don't really watch what other people put in their trolleys but it wouldn't occur to me or dh to buy multiple packs of biscuits a week. We see one we like, we grab a pack. We eat some in an evening or two but when they've run out, we don't, and we don't think much about it either way. We have cooked dinners and don't get hungry before bed. I think that's way more normal. Just can't imagine grabbing four or more packs of biscuits to put in the trolley

If he likes a few biscuits every night then he needs about an hours fairly intensive exercise a day to counteract that.
If he can't be arsed, then no treats.

I suspect that he does not carry much if any muscle and so any weight gain goes straight to his middle.

Anything you can get out and do together? Indoor climbing is a lot of fun and makes you quite lean and muscular. It's usually very sociable too.

He needs to do proper cardio exercise, and possibly some weight training. 10k steps isn’t enough.

He does eat healthy meals. I know it's the extra snacks that are causing the gain. He said he eats nuts during the day. Which he never told me about, the other day.

He didn't have any biscuits or any sweets last night. I am going to support him.

He said he also wants to start doing some other form of exercise as opposed to just doing 10k steps everyday. Though he does walk quite fast and is often out of breath when he comes back, from the walk. However, that could be due to lack of fitness.

@Caerulea I did say to him that his shape may have changed. As he is getting older. Also, he said he's never really been slim. He's always been on the heavier side.

I think I will just support him in whatever he decides to do.

Well when he "finished" the diet he was 10st. He's now 10st7. So a definite gain. I just don't see the extra on him!

My husband is 12stone at that height and has visible abs and a 30 inch waist so it does seem very skinny to me!

What age is he?
My dad was about 10 and half stone at 23 , Like my sons.
You can bet grandad wasn't that once passed 40
Naturally filled out like most men.

Sorry op just notice he's 27.
So yes still maintain natural body changes.
Get him the next sized jeans.
32 on a man looks good so he's fine.

@TammyJones he does have the next size up. And they fit him. As he didn't get rid once they became too big. He doesn't have anything bigger though. He got rid of a lot that was way too big, after he lost the weight.

Sugar does that. Keeping the same weight is 99% what you eat and 1% exercise imho.

Sorry if I'm being dim but your thread title says he's not putting on weight?

If he weighs himself he'll know whether he is or isn't?

@KajsaKavat he didn't have any biscuits or snacks yesterday. He found it quite difficult. But said he's still tracking to ensure he's not eating extras.

@WhateverMate I meant i didn't notice or certainly couldn't tell he had put weight on.

Everyone benefits from exercise, and maintaining a healthy weight is only part of this. Well-being, low blood pressure, bone density, balance, flexibility, muscle strength etc. etc. all protect your physical and mental health into middle and old age. How is this not better understood?

It's a bmi of 23, 11st 5 is the upper limit of the healthy weight range for that height.

OK but you said...

He said, I am putting on weight. I said, perhaps your body shape has changed or that's because you are sitting down a lot. He then went off looking worried and tried some other clothes on. Again, the tops were fine, just struggled to get the buttons done up on trousers and jeans.

Why would you say that to him when you both know he's gained weight?

It's just a simple fact.

It sounds like you are writing about your son rather than partner.

Ok, well that clarifies it a bit better, or perhaps I missed that bit sorry if so

So in answer strictly to your query, yes you're being unreasonble to say he isnt putting on weight if he's asking you that, as the facts are the facts!!

But as others have said, probably a bit of better body distribution would resolve the issue.

I say that a someone who really doesnt do enough exercise or movement. I dont know where I'd find the time to do 10k steps a day even if I could manage that amount, it takes me well over an hour to walk 3 miles and I just dont have the time in the day to do that, good on him for managing that, I think 10k steps is 5 miles is it?