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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is pretty shitty behaviour re daughter’s interview

75 replies

bagpuss90 · 08/10/2023 14:58

My daughter applied for a Saturday job as a shampooist in a hairdressers. She got an interview yesterday afternoon - dressed up smartly and arrived 5 mins early . Then only to be told they’d already given the job to an applicant that morning. Just turned her away , didn’t do the interview. She rang me up in tears (she’d been quite nervous) 5 mins after her interview was meant to start (so she wasn’t late ) Should I leave it or ring up and complain? They had her contact details- they could have let her know - manners cost nothing . In some ways I’m thinking she had a lucky escape tho

OP posts:
StarlightLime · 08/10/2023 15:01

That's appalling. So bloody rude, but yes, she definitely dodged a bullet.

10HailMarys · 08/10/2023 15:02

What on earth do you think you would achieve by ringing up to complain?

Of course they should have let her know, but it was casual kids’ Saturday job in a hair salon and it’s not a formal recruitment process. Also it’s a job, not school, so candidates’ mums shouldn’t be getting involved in any way whatsoever.

Rainallnight · 08/10/2023 15:03

You shouldn’t ring up and complain. You could support her to send a professional sounding email to them expressing her disappointment. But otherwise, she has to chalk it up to a life lesson that the world of work can be shitty

reallypuzzledoverthis · 08/10/2023 15:04

She had a lucky escape there, wishing her luck in finding a job that appreciates her!

Jellycatspyjamas · 08/10/2023 15:04

It’s shitty behaviour but I wouldn’t call to complain. If your DD is old enough to look for a weekend job it’ll be good for her to learn how to cope with disappointment and unprofessional behaviour. At very least she’ll remember how it felt and it’ll inform her behaviour in her career.

Thebigblueballoon · 08/10/2023 15:04

Really bloody rude. But you’re right in thinking your daughter has had a lucky escape. Sounds like they’d treat her like poo if they had employed her. Hopefully her next experience will be far better. Just make sure you reassure her their crappy behaviour wasn’t her fault - she couldn’t have done anything to change the situation.

Aquamarine1029 · 08/10/2023 15:04

Should I leave it or ring up and complain?

Of course you should leave it. Good grief. Don't be "that" parent. A little disappointment is good for young people. It's something we all have to learn to manage and learn from. We get knocked down, we get back up and move forward.

SylvieLaufeydottir · 08/10/2023 15:04

You will do her absolutely zero favours by getting involved.

They can give the job to anyone they want for any reason, unless it constitutes illegal discrimination against a protected class. There will be lots and lots and lots of times in your life you don't get the job, and encouraging her to treat this as a) a terrible injustice and b) a tragedy is not the way to go.

MankyMinge · 08/10/2023 15:07

@bagpuss90 if your daughter wants to make a complaint that's up to her. It should not come from you. Otherwise this just reinforced their belief that she is a child who can be pushed around and treated like dirt.

uhtredofbattenberg · 08/10/2023 15:10

Its annoying but par for the course. My Dd applied for lots of jobs a few months ago. Many places didn't reply at all.
It would probably been a shit job anyway..

Good luck to her for her future job searching.

Fluffycloudsfloatinginthesky · 08/10/2023 15:10

My daughter turned up for an interview to be told she wasn’t 16 so they could not employ her. She had handed her cv into them and they had had it nearly a week but apparently ‘hadn’t had a chance to call her’. Turned out she had a lucky escape as her friend got a job and they paid terribly and treated her not that great and she has left after 3 months. Well know high street chain as well. My daughter got a much better job elsewhere.

Original poster
bagpuss90 · 08/10/2023 15:13

MankyMinge
that’s a good point

OP posts:
Alwaysoneoddsock · 08/10/2023 15:17

She is a child and she has been treated like dirt. Therefore, as an adult I would say something to them.

They may not have thought about how their actions made other people feel. If I was them I would welcome the feedback as you can’t afford to alienate future customers (the person they upset, their friends and families).

CosyCoffee · 08/10/2023 15:17

I would make a post on local Facebook groups naming and shaming the salon, as I would want to know if my hair salon behaved this way to young people looking for work. I have an anonymous Facebook profile specifically for this kind of thing.

Weedoormatnomore · 08/10/2023 15:27

Sounds like a lucky escape and terrible communication if she was only offered an interview the day before. Hope she finds something soon.

Thewizardbinbag · 08/10/2023 15:29

If this happened here, the girl’s mum would have posted a rant on all the local fb pages!

Runnerinthenight · 08/10/2023 15:29

I guarantee, it won't be long until this job is up for grabs again.

Your DD should not apply!!

poetryandwine · 08/10/2023 15:35

Rant anonymously —- that is, without disclosing your relationship to DD —- all you want, OP. Name and shame the salon if you like. They deserve it.

But ask yourself whether your aim is to help DD grow up, develop resilience and function in the world? That should answer your question.

CremeEggThief · 08/10/2023 15:38

YANBU that she was treated very unfairly, but YABU to think you complaining can do anything about it!

MammaTo · 08/10/2023 15:41

I know it’s hard but don’t phone up - it’s a life lesson in bullet dodging for your daughter. There’s going to be so many things in her working life where you’ll feel like ringing someone’s neck but she has to learn to deal with these things. Just be there for advice and guidance, it’s all you can do.

RedSquirrelsRock · 08/10/2023 15:45

Tbh, I know she would have had my best interests at heart, but I would have been motified had my mum complained on my behalf.
Be there for your dd when she needs you and asks for your help and support.

momonpurpose · 08/10/2023 15:53

10HailMarys · 08/10/2023 15:02

What on earth do you think you would achieve by ringing up to complain?

Of course they should have let her know, but it was casual kids’ Saturday job in a hair salon and it’s not a formal recruitment process. Also it’s a job, not school, so candidates’ mums shouldn’t be getting involved in any way whatsoever.

Please do not do this. All you will accomplish is making your daughter the joke of the Salon because of mummy's complaint.

Lucyintheskywithadiamond · 08/10/2023 16:29

CosyCoffee · 08/10/2023 15:17

I would make a post on local Facebook groups naming and shaming the salon, as I would want to know if my hair salon behaved this way to young people looking for work. I have an anonymous Facebook profile specifically for this kind of thing.

I would do the same. The way businesses treat their employees do determine if they get my business. Shit behaviour on their part.

shellyleppard · 08/10/2023 16:35

Yep it's shitty but.....life unfortunately is. It sounds like she dodged a bullet though..... good luck for the future. (Have an 18 year old going through similar)

43ontherocksporfavor · 08/10/2023 16:48

They are very rude. I can imagine it was a big deal to your daughter and all the nerves etc. She has definitely had a lucky escape. I wouldn’t bother phoning up, it won’t mean anything to them as they’re obviously a bit dim.

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