to refuse to allow DS2 (15) to go to the V Festival weekend, with one friend?

[WendyWeber]

He wants to see Travis. We've said they can go for the day, but he only wants to go to the whole thing so we have dug in, and said no.

15 is too young, isn't it? His older sisters are going, and if he is there they will feel they have to be responsible and look out for him, and that's not fair (and they never went anywhere at 15 )

Travis aren't doing many concerts any more but the DDs said they'd only be on for 2 or 3 songs and he'd be better waiting for a proper gig...

Heyyyyy

If Travis are playing on a normal stage, they would be playing a set of a minimum of half an hour, more likely 45 minutes I would expect. To be honest, a festival is a pretty safe place for a teenage kid to go to experience a bit of freedom - there's medical tents and stewards everywhere, and people have a sense of community he wouldn't get, say, on a caravan site, or on holiday. The main thing you need to be fairly sure of is his attitude to drugs. To be totally honest, I wouldn't worry about any kid taking E or having a smoke at a festival - statistically, it's hugely unlikely anything will go wrong - but if you think he's remotely interested in taking acid, have a chat with him. It's really not a good place to take yr first trip. Chances are, though, that like the thousands of teenage kids who go to these things, he'll just be there for a couple of beers and pissing around until 4am making silly noises and eating chips. And tell him V's a bit like a corporate gig in a field - if he wants a real festival, try Bastival, Secret Garden, Big Chill, Green Man or Glastonbury xxx

go with him

Go with him???

Thanks, 2shoes, but no thanks

REALLY, LV? You think? I'm not concerned about drugs and drink (BTDTGTT, re drink at least) - more about them losing everything they own out of their tent. Or not finding their tent ever again. Or someone taking the tent as well as everything they own!

He mostly just wants to see Travis - he loves Travis - their only gigs recently have been Glasgow & Nottingham AFAIK.

I don't know what to doooo now. Tickets go on sale at 10am tomorrow....

(WWW should be WW of course, sorry )

(Though I daresay WWW would also shriek)

ds is 16 and NO WAY
i would let him go in a group if it had older sensible(known to me) people in it. but not 2, 15 yr olds.

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Hi, Aimsmum - no, not nearer 16, he turns 15 next month. The friend he would go with is a similar age but a nice sensible lad - well, DS2 is a nice sensible lad, mostly...

DD2 is coming here tomorrow morning to book their tickets - I will talk to her about it again, re them being there if needed but in no way responsible - that might work.

(He and his friends are doing Duke of Ed bronze expedition in June, plus a camping trip of their own in April, plus a cycling trip in the summer - they are fairly level-headed but, you know, lads together )

I would feel happier with him going with one friend than with a bigger group if he was mine. In my experience, 2 teenagers have two brains, but they lose a quarter of a brain for each additional person in the group. So, 2= 2 brains, 4=1.5 brains, 6=1 brain. 10 teenagers, by extrapolation have no brain at all......

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LOL, seeker

sc and SM, thanks for your thoughts too (trouble is I'm so old and suspicious )

SM, he says his friend says his parents are cool with it, but this has all just cropped up tonight so we haven't had a chance to speak to them - I'm guessing they are though, his friend is a nice straight lad, no bs with him.

DS2 also says that his friend says if he can't go to V with DS2 he'll go to Leeds with someone else - but he'd rather go to V with DS2 - but he will be going to something, whatever happens. I showed DS2 LV's message and he said yes, he would love to go to Glastonbury, but for this year he'd rather go to V (and see Travis, obv)

Thanks so much for all your thoughts, they have made us reconsider - I will think on

ww read your post and changed my mind. let him go

seeker ...and you're so right too!

ww. join forces with the friend's parents - what do they think?

also i think what sleep cat says makes a lot of sense. There is a point where the more responsibility you give a teen the more they rise to it.

Do sympathise though, you wish you didn't have to make these kind of decisions dontcha?

atm he has a a paper round, which pays incredibly well (£25 a week ) and in theory he saves £20 of that - he would be paying the whole thing himself, so as far as that's concerned it is up to him...

I've just checked out the V website, a weekend camping ticket is £145 + booking fee, or 7+ weeks' wages.

(I think it's looking now as if he will be going - I told DH what you have all said . The DDs will divorce me after the conversation we had earlier this evening...)

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Oh let him go!!

V is a very very very safe, sanitised and corporate festival, I would be far more concerned about Leeds where it is traditional to burn down all the portaloos every year! Really, nothing bad will happen to him there.

Oh, x-posted, I am glad on his behalf that you are going to let him go. Can't wait til I can take DS to festivals and be all embarrassing mum

I'm really pleased he's going too! My dad would never let me got to anything - so I either had to not go or lie. I love the thought of these young things trying their wings! [elderly emoticon}