To want a cleaner that will pick my clothes up off the floor?

[Zamphina]

Dp and I work very long hours during the week. We’re out of the house 9-10 minimum. We eat dinner in the office. When we get home we’re exhausted and just want to sleep. So often the kitchen has our breakfast stuff. We’ve left clothes on the floor. There might be sunday’s dishes on the table. The laundry has been left out drying.

We earn an OK salary and have a tiny flat to save money, so a cleaner coming 2-3 times a week for two hours a time won’t be an issue.

But obviously I’m slightly embarrassed for someone to see my home in such a mess. Are there any cleaners who will sort all of this? Pick up the clothes, put them on to wash, load the dishwasher, and clean the bathroom etc?

Ha 😂

Because the OP is exhausted and asked for help. I'm trying to counter the personalised attacks and the 'just do the thing' responses that she's clearly struggling to do. I can empathise with the OP, I had a similar overwhelm when I started work and I wasn't a lazy spoiled brat.

You're not exhausted in the morning though? You're not that exhausted to have laundry baskets next to where you keep dropping your clothes on the floor so even at night if you still can't pick them up off the floor and sling in it in the basket right next to it, you can in the morning. Im sorry its just sheer laziness you don't have 2 seconds to do that

I find this perspective so interesting. Do you apply it to everything, e.g. you wouldn't dream of going to the dentist to get your teeth cleaned because you should be flossing religiously every day? Or get your car valeted because you should be cleaning it yourself? Or get the windows washed because you should do it yourself? There's a value judgement applied to cleaning that is not applied to other jobs.

Working long hours doesn't mean someone can't be lazy. It just means they work long hours.

That's it.

You can be lazy in different areas of your life and not lazy in others. It's not a blanket statement about someone's life or character.

I just had a coffee and pastry delivered to me because I was too lazy to go to the shop 10 mins away. I'm not lazy at work because that's the job I get paid to do.

But I've never been so lazy that I'd be wanting to pay someone to pick up my dirty knickers off the floor because I do have some self-respect and respect for other people that I may employ.

Where did the OP say she wanted someone to pick dirty knickers off the floor? She said clothes - you are making quite the leap.

Those jobs aren't the same as picking up someone's pants from the floor. Equally, I clean my own car for this very reason. A Dentist is a medical professional that has had years of training to provide that medical care, how is that the same as cleaning. It doesn't take any training to be able to clean up your own mess. A window cleaner will be using a ladder and that is most likely something many people don't own or it is unsafe to do due to who they are. The dirt on windows is not dirt made by you the person. I find it a bit entitled I suppose to expect someone to pick up and clean up a mess I made, extenuating circumstances being the exception.

The thread title is literally 'Am I unreasonable to want a cleaner to pick my clothes up off the floor?'.

Not 'Am I unreasonable to leave my clothes on a chair for a cleaner to fold or launder'.

So that's why so many people were commenting on the OP wanting to pay someone to pick up their dirty clothes, including dirty knickers from the floor.

Because if the OP could manage to pick up their knickers and put them in a basket, they could pick up the rest of the clothes at the same time. So obviously, 'pick up my clothes off the floor' includes dirty knickers and pants of the DP.

That's why people are talking about underwear.

It's not really a leap, underwear is clothing , some dirty socks stuck at the bottom of trousers that have been chucked on tje floor - not exactly a leap.

No, just no. Slovenly, dirty and totally unreasonable to expect someone to come into your house and pick up your dirty clothes that you step out off and throw on the floor. Takes 2 seconds to put them in a laundry hamper. No excuse under the sun to justify that level of laziness. I'd expect more from a toddler.

@LolaSmiles But there’s a huge difference between thinking “I’ll just leave that for someone else to do” and asking “would it be possible to pay someone to do that for me”, isn’t there?

I guess I just can’t see why wanting to pay someone to do something you don’t want to do makes you inherently lazy, regardless of what that thing is. I can’t understand why we outsource some things and no-one bats an eyelid but we ask whether it’s possible to outsource something else and suddenly we’re lazy and entitled and have no respect for other people?

Like I just said to another poster. If OP specifically wants to pay someone to pick up their clothes off the floor, that's going to include underwear.

Unless OP is saying she can manage to pick up underwear to put in a basket but not other clothes at the same time? Which makes no sense at all. If she's already there picking up underwear from the floor and can put her knickers in a basket she can pick up the other clothes as it doesn't take additional time.

It's not 'a leap' at all. If someone claims they need to pay someone to pick up their clothes from the floor because they're just too tired or lazy, its going to include underwear.

I don't understand what is the point of working hard all hours, being at home hardly ever and with zero energy left to function in your own home.
You're better off living in a hotel with a full daily cleaning and laundry on a B&B basis.
Zero stress regarding cleaning, washing, cooking etc.
Rent out your current residence and stay in a hotel until work schedules settle down.

No, but I'm dealing with a child on my own with no support from a partner while working full time. That's just as much work as a 13 hour job.

But you're talking about having a cleaner, and in the vast majority of cases what a cleaner is doing is dusting, hoovering, washing floors etc. I personally think it's more disgusting to not floss and expect your dentist to scrape that build up off your teeth than someone hoovering my stairs. The 'picking up dirty knickers' has just entered this conversation as a way to cast even more judgement on the OP I reckon. But we won't convince each other and that's okay.

Im not saying your life is easy, Im saying it's different. If you came here saying 'I'm exhausted with my workload and at home responsibilities. I know I should eat healthier and exercise more for my health but I just keep defaulting to the take aways and collapsing on the couch. Can I get someone to come into the house and cook for me each week?'. Would you like support and encouragement about how to achieve that or to be told you're lazy and disgusting and hear about all the people who can do all you do and more and home cook every day and work out 3 times a week. I see that as equivalent, because I don't attach a higher moral value to cleaning than any other responsibility that we have as an adult.

We are not talking about someone hoovering your stairs, we are talking about stepping out of your dirty clothes and throwing them on the floor and expecting someone else to come in and pick them up and wash them. It's the height of ignorance, it's the epitome of laziness and it is not on. Bend down pick up your dirty clothes and underwear and out them in the laundry basket for the cleaner to wash. She's already coming in to yesterdays dinner dishes still on the table and not even in the sink, or on the side. HOW long does it take to put your clothes in a feckin hamper. 2 seconds. No, she wants the cleaner to pick them up where she stood out of them. My 4 year old wouldn't do that.

Picking up someone's dirty laundry that has been discarded on the floor is not cleaning. It's rude, disrespectful, entitled and lazy.

Actually @Goldenbear was saying that and it was the overarching perspective of 'I'd never have a cleaner' that I was responding to because some people do have that view.

You made a ridiculous comparison of valeting your car and going to the dentist and getting your windows washed...they don't compare at all with stepping out of dirty clothes and expecting someone else to pick them up.

@Hellaweirdhuh chair/floor - kind of the same.

I tend to take off clothes and leave them in a pile on the floor if dirty to ensure they don't get mixed up with clean clothes or a pair of trousers that I may wear more than once before washing.

This thread just shows how insane so many people are and why it's so hard getting paid help in this country, because you get cleaners who say that they don't wash dishes or pick clothes from the floor!

It's the same because not flossing is also because you are too lazy to.

Not picking clothes from the floor is akin to not putting dishes in the sink or dishwasher after using them. Both of which I occasionally do if rushing!

You pick up a pair of trousers off the floor where you discarded them with other dirty clothes to wear again....ok then.

That's a very weak straw man argument.

The OP is literally 'Am I unreasonable to want a cleaner to pick my clothes up off the floor'.

So many, many people said yes. Not unreasonable to want a cleaner. And not unreasonable to work long hours and find it hard to keep on top of housework.

But unreasonable to be so lazy that the OP feels unable to stagger a few steps in a tiny flat to put their dirty clothes including dirty underwear into a basket and specifically ask if they were unreasonable to want a cleaner to pick their dirty clothes including knickers off the floor because it's apparently just too hard for 2 able bodied graduates earning way above the national average to manage that.

And you, and a few others seem to think it's not in any way lazy to not do so and try to suggest it's the same as a full-time working lone parent ordering a takeaway and VERY hypotthetically hiring a caterer instead if they can afford it. Quick clue BTW, most couldn't afford it because ya know, lone parenting and all that.

I don't think there would be many posters who would accuse that OP of being lazy or disgusting because well, they wouldn't be, and nothing about it would be viewed as lazy or disgusting.

This thread is why I don't bother asking anything on MN.

So many batshit crazy people who can't comprehend that people have very different lifestyles to their own.

Many women on this thread are likely of the view that it's lazy to even have a cleaner. For many people, especially if you have a high paid and stressful job, spending 6 hours of scarce time cleaning or the effort of separating dirty clothes by colour to wash IS a big waste of time...