To want a cleaner that will pick my clothes up off the floor?

[Zamphina]

Dp and I work very long hours during the week. We’re out of the house 9-10 minimum. We eat dinner in the office. When we get home we’re exhausted and just want to sleep. So often the kitchen has our breakfast stuff. We’ve left clothes on the floor. There might be sunday’s dishes on the table. The laundry has been left out drying.

We earn an OK salary and have a tiny flat to save money, so a cleaner coming 2-3 times a week for two hours a time won’t be an issue.

But obviously I’m slightly embarrassed for someone to see my home in such a mess. Are there any cleaners who will sort all of this? Pick up the clothes, put them on to wash, load the dishwasher, and clean the bathroom etc?

Ok

Some truly amazing responses here.

Why on earth would you pick up after yourself, do laundry, dishwasher etc if you can pay someone else to do it without much of a financial sacrifice? I mean, hey, a laundry basket probably won’t kill you so things look reasonable on the days the cleaner isn’t there, but otherwise don’t let the petty brigade on here guilt you into anything.

Your time is economically more valuable than the cleaner’s so naturally you would maximise your time in the office while you’re building your careers and when you’re not working you should be relaxing rather than doing laundry. Who would choose to be home with the dishwasher over furthering your career or going to the cinema?

There is zero shame in paying someone to tidy, clean, wash, iron etc for you. Way worse jobs in the world.

Agree! Before I had kids I was out the house 11 hours a day and my house was spotless. The evenings were so much time without kids to run after!

DH and I had jobs and hours like this. I get it - there is no time or energy for ANYTHING.

My suggestion is to have a cleaner who comes on Monday. You can have a quick tidy up on a Sunday. I know sometimes even Sundays will get shafted by work but it will hopefully be rare that both of you are working all day on a Sunday.

If you want someone who comes twice a week then you’ll need someone who’s happy to do some tidying. They do exist but be up front about what is required.

People talking about 9-10 hours out of the house being normal - no, they are out of the house 13 hours minimum and often longer. Read the thread.

Lots of harsh responses, really not needed. You're asking if you can pay someone a service for how things are in your household, not for anyone to judge what you do in your own home behind closed doors. It seems you can get a housekeeper and a cleaner combined so definitely go for it Op :) it is hard starting out in a career but will pay off. I admire the hours you're doing, the ambition now will pay off! Having a cleaner will make this time much easier for you too. Best of luck

Just depends how you've been brought up I suppose. I can afford a cleaner but I don't have one, and if I did it wouldn't be to pick up after me, I'd be embarrassed to be that lazy.

Finding the replies to this post utterly bizarre tbh.

I am very very messy (clothes over floor, dishes everywhere etc) but in a senior, high-paying job. I tidy for my cleaner, but when I haven't got time I tell her to leave the messy rooms.

She happily goes into the rooms and tidies up all my mess. She even told me the other day she sees me as a little sister and wants to help - she's tidied all my drawers, organised everything. I pay her well and we get on great, she's lovely.

I don't think you'll have any issue finding a cleaner happy to pick up and tidy your mess - you just need to be upfront about it. I also don't see what the problem with this is if you can afford to pay someone to do this for you.

Sounds like you need a nannies, leaving them on the floor is teenagerish. Stop demeaning another human being.

It was completely obvious she meant 9am (and often earlier) to 10pm.

And if it wasn’t completely obvious, it’s been clarified numerous times on the thread.

Nothing to do with upbringing - just a different perspective on how you use a service. The OP can hardly be described as lazy given how much she works. It’s a simple trade-off between what constitutes relative value of time. And the service provider is not here to do you a favour (thus creating embarrassment by asking too much of them) but to do a defined job for which you pay them. If they need to do more work because you’re untidy, they’ll get paid more. Win-win.

Genuinely asking and not trying to sound argumentative but how is it demeaning if they're being paid and choosing that work? I don't see it as too dissimilar to letting my nails get in a state for my nail lady to give me a pedicure. Yes I can do it myself and if I weren't paying her then sorting out my manky feet might be demeaning but as a job it's not, it's paid work.

I guess if you talk to the potential cleaner upfront and lay out what you want they can choose if you pay enough to pick up dirty knickers / sweaty clothes etc. But good luck finding that person. I’d want a high salary for that and to be honest would still be a bit judgemental.

I admire the hours they're putting in too, and wish them well. I know a lot of people who put in hours like this (in medicine, law, and finance).

But throwing your clothes in a laundry basket is as easy as letting them fall where they may - just put a basket in the bedroom and one in the bathroom - and carrying your dinner stuff and pots to the sink takes ten minutes max after you've eaten, and that includes scraping your pots and plates into the bin.

There are a lot of people in successful careers who think clearing up their own shit is beneath them. Fine, get a cleaner but to not even be able to put your laundry in a basket is utterly pathetic. I don't even tolerate that from my children. There's a basic level of functioning you should be able to achieve.

Come on, no-one grows up dreaming of being a cleaner when they grow up. It’s honest, hard work but often done because of a lack of options (having to work around childcare etc). There’s something very disrespectful about wanting to pay someone to pick your dirty pants up off the floor.

Leaving clothes on the floor instead of just putting them in a wash basket is lazy, I don't care how many hours they work. People use it as an excuse for slovenliness, it's grim.

The OP can hardly be described as lazy given how much she works.

She has prioritised high status work and high earnings and is using her choice as an excuse, and the fact she's offering some desperate soul money, to get someone else to come to her home and touch smelly, sweaty, perhaps even crusty clothing.

A lot of people would be embarrassed at their inability to adult.

Would the people who think this is fine be happy with their children just dumping their dirty clothes on the bedroom floor for someone else to sort out?

I think throwing dirty laundry in a laundry basket takes the same amount of time as throwing them on the floor, this one you should be able to manage.
Leaving food / dirty plates out for long is going to attract mice, especially at this time of year.
It is hard to stay on top of things when you are working long hours but you need to get into the habit of doing the basics, some of the things you mentioned takes minutes to do, especially between two

How is picking up someone’s clothes more demeaning than cleaning their toilet?

Either both are demeaning and nobody should have a cleaner, or neither is.

I can't believe people are saying the OP is lazy when they work such long hours. I dread to think what state my flat would be in if I worked like that.

Kudos to you for working so hard. I couldn't do it.
What's the OP's working hours got to do with it?It's about half a second more effort to decide to put clothes in a laundry hamper rather than toss them on the floor.

What's really funny on this thread is that if someone earns a lot of money then they couldn't possibly be being lazy because they work long hours (presumably because it's just super hard being awesome all day that using a laundry hamper is a difficult task).

It's lazy to do regardless of earning power.

OP can make whatever household arrangements they want and spend their money on whatever domestic business arrangement will facilitate the life they choose though.

Christ, you couldn't pay me any amount of money to work in an office until 10pm every night

If you are going to bed in darkness, because it’s 1am and your partner has already gone to bed, it is NOT just as easy to put your clothes in the basket as on the floor.

You’d leave your skidders (or your kids) in the loo for a cleaner to scrub…..?

I don’t think so.

To many people, this is akin to expecting a cleaner to pick up dirty underwear.